What if one of your sons 'steals' your other sons gf?

[MorrisZapp]

Obviously the girlfriend is a sentient being and can't be stolen but the world won't see it that way and nor will your dumped, heartbroken son.
This has happened in my wider family. The sons are in their twenties and the first son had been together with his lovely girlfriend for years.
I just don't know how to feel about it all. I'm so desperately heartbroken for my nephew, he's lost everything. But my other nephew is a kind, gentle person who I know would never deliberately hurt anyone.
God I feel for their mum. Is there any way if enough time passes they can find a way back to a normal family relationship? I'm actually relieved this Christmas will be so socially limited now as I just don't see how we could accommodate this bewildering new normal. Has this happened in anyone else's family?

I know that all three parties are kind people but I accept others may find that odd.

Yes, they are finding it odd. Because it's not true. The test of whether a person is good, moral, truly kind and 'nice' isn't if you are all those things when it's easy. It's whether you are still all those things when it's a challenge.

Your nephew and his girlfriend have shown their colours.

Bloody hell betrayedsister, I wouldn’t blame you for going permanent NC with your family over that!

It's just a total no-no. If you can't find a girlfriend from all the women available, but have to resort to taking your brothers, then there is something seriously wrong with you. You can't take a girlfriend from anyone, she isn't a thing she is a human being and if she wants to ditch one brother and date the other that is not her being taken.

That might have called a rift, but would not have caused as much damage as cheating and 'stealing' the girlfriend. Didn't the OP say she didn't know if cheating was involved?

BumFacedCat, I really don't know why I didn't. I suppose I felt I didn't really have the option. I didn't know NC was a "thing".

I think my mum feels terrible about it all now, but my other siblings think the whole thing was a fuss over nothing. To be fair to them they had no idea how in love I was. My father viewed it all as a distasteful episode not to be spoken of.

I really do have a very superficial relationship with most of them now. But I do observe some of the niceties around weddings, funerals and the odd Christmas. And now that my mum is getting frail, I am beginning to remember all the great things she did - the boyfriend episode was an aberration and I expect she had no idea how to react, and let herself be led by my father who was terribly into appearances and hated swearing.