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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Guy having long monologues during the date

156 replies

IvyMayaZ · 19/07/2020 13:20

Started Dating great guy. Same goals in life, values, amazing sex, connection....
However, he likes to have a long talks about his passions. For example stars talking about a movie in so much details that he talks for 30mins. If I try to jump in conversation just to ask question he just says “let me finish first I’ll get there”. At the end I feel stupid because he end the conversation and there is nothing else I feel I can contribute with. I am really trying to start conversations myself and I hoped we will get to point where our conversation flow a bit more. He decided yesterday to ask if I have any passions and that he wants us to be 50/50 not him talking all the time (we texted prior meeting for 3months so he knows I’m busy single mum and just like typical things - movie here and there, I study university, go gym - no big passions). I just found it a bit rude - I thought when he talks so much and doesn’t want me to interrupt at all for 30mins he just loves to talk. Any thoughts ?

OP posts:
MarthasGinYard · 21/07/2020 12:45

Reminds me of someone I dated who was wonderful at first. Actually ended up being very controlling, and hated if I ever butted into his any of his spiels and suggested anything other than his bedroom repatiore.

Prob just me projecting

I wouldn't bother with a date to explain though OP

Trust your instincts

cameocat · 21/07/2020 13:18

DH's best friend is like this. He talks at you, not to you. I am bored senseless by it and have had evenings where I have literally said nothing. It is mind numbing!

Fortunately we live in different countries now so I do t have to suffer him very often.

Well done for getting rid!

SandieCheeks · 21/07/2020 13:28

If I try to jump in conversation just to ask question he just says “let me finish first I’ll get there”.

Oh my god Shock

If you wanted to salvage anything I would just be super blunt - stop him and say "I haven't seen XMen 4 and don't really want to hear about it. Let's talk about something else - did you read about XYZ in the news?"

comingintomyown · 21/07/2020 14:15

Why don’t you just send a polite message rather than subject yourself to any more of it ? Rest assured he’s so thick skinned it won’t be a mean thing to do

Alcoholisshit · 26/07/2020 10:18

What happened?

TheGodmother · 26/07/2020 10:36

Well done for dumping him!

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