If you found a vibrator in your DH’s drawer...

[Applesarenotoranges]

Specifically, if you found 2 new vibrators, an enema and already knew about a butt plug.

None used with you...

What would you think?

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You know, since I was a teenager, magazines have regularly published articles along the lines of 'want to know the sexiest thing that you can possibly do to a man?' (Answer: shove your finger up his arse).

But every single man I've spoken to about this has said 'Nooooooo fucking way!' Well, with the exception of a gay friend.

It's a weird one.

I've been out with a couple of men who have loved it, but they haven't asked, I've had to follow the signs

oh for goodness sake talk to him or slip him a finger and see how that goes Your sexlife could go to a whole new level

You can acknowledge that the anus and rectum if either sex are not intended for sexual intercourse without being disgusted by it.
Yes I know, that would be my take on it.

What a passive aggressive, leading, smarmy way of trying to call someone homophobic.
I disagree with everything you have written here GilbertMarkham. I asked a direct, closed question.

I mean I think I would feel a bit hurt that he wasn’t sharing with me. Wait that sounded unhygienic I don’t mean sharing in that sense I mean being open about it and allowing me to watch or help him use it but it wouldn’t overly concern me. You should ask if perhaps he would like the plug up his bum while you are on top that seems to be a real favourite with many men.

@DioneTheDiabolist

Are you disgusted by gay men having anal sex Carlottacoffee?

Well I don’t tend to think about when my brother is having sex with his boyfriend tbh, it’s none of my business. But I can assure you he thinks vagina sex is rank and smelly- So I think we are pretty even Stevens on it.

Was you trying to catch me out as homophobic 😂😂😂

@DanceItOut

I mean I think I would feel a bit hurt that he wasn’t sharing with me. Wait that sounded unhygienic I don’t mean sharing in that sense I mean being open about it and allowing me to watch or help him use it but it wouldn’t overly concern me. You should ask if perhaps he would like the plug up his bum while you are on top that seems to be a real favourite with many men.

God I’m so vanilla

Too much information!

Sounds like he lived one up the bum during masturbation.

I'd probs ask him about it and if he'd like to try that together.

Liking something up the bum doesn't worry me (Male g spot hello) but I'd like to be able to discuss it

Was you trying to catch me out as homophobic 😂😂😂

Certainly seemed that way to me.

oh for goodness sake talk to him or slip him a finger and see how that goes Your sexlife could go to a whole new level

Maybe some people dont want to stick their fingers up their partner's ass. Imagine that.

Leave him alone. If he wants you to know what he is up to he will tell you. He is a grown man who is doing nothing adulterous, dangerous or illegal as far as you know. Even married people are allowed a little privacy.

He probably didn't tell you for fear you would blab about it to strangers on mumsnet...

He’s sticking them up someone else’s bum

@Localocal

Leave him alone. If he wants you to know what he is up to he will tell you. He is a grown man who is doing nothing adulterous, dangerous or illegal as far as you know. Even married people are allowed a little privacy.

He probably didn't tell you for fear you would blab about it to strangers on mumsnet...

How would I know he’s not doing something adulterous? It was partly why I was asking. And as for “blabbing” on MN, why would that matter to him? It’s anonymous, after all...

My first thoughts would be that he's bisexual, my second thoughts would be that he's using it on himself to masturbate and my third thoughts would be to slip a finger up there and see the reaction. Not that that would give me any answers so I'd probably have to confront him about it.

I don't understand why you can't just ask him all your questions? I would definitely ask my husband. Also just because someone finds anal sex gross doesn't make them homophobic for those suggesting that.

It sounds like he likes anal play (hence the emema). Maybe he’s embarrassed so hasn’t said anything but plenty of men enjoy the prostate massage as it makes their orgasms more intense. Maybe indulge him and buy a strap on to surprise him with!

I wouldn’t like it & it would be the end of a relationship for me, especially if there had been no discussion or inclusion about it.
More importantly... how do YOU feel about it? X

I wouldn’t like it & it would be the end of a relationship for me, especially if there had been no discussion or inclusion about it.

Is the man not allowed any privacy? He doesn't need to discuss it or include OP.

Concerned.

I also think he's probably just embarrassed. He likely uses the enema to clear out properly before using them so there's no mess for anyone to discover or question. I just don't think cheating is part of any of this, purely because I can't imagine allowing a partner to bring their own vibrator to use on me as I'd wonder why they had it, where it came from and who else they'd used it with. It would make more sense that the woman brought it/took it home, surely. Also, i know it is a kink for a fraction of people (nothing wrong with it) but I wouldn't let someone use an enema on me either, I'd do it myself beforehand! So it's unlikely that he's got it for someone else to use. So that leads me to believe they are his, his only and he enjoys it. Hope you chat about it properly and possibly enjoy it together!

An enema?!
Unless he suffers with chronic constipation I’d be worried he might be having some bum fun with a male friend.

Get a strap on

I couldn’t date any man into “ass play” sorry just not for me, total turn off.

I’d think he likes to play with his bum, no big deal.