Is height really important ?

[fortunacookie]

Had a social distance date with a guy yesterday. Was a little disappointed to see he looked shorter than the 5'11 that was on his profile (I'm 5'7 so quite tall) but then when we got talking I found him a nice person and we seemed to get on great.

Just wondered others thoughts on height and those who have a partner what are your heights ? Does it bother you ?

'But my tall male friends have always preferred tall females who are at least the same height as them'

I'm 46 and 5'3 (maybe 5'2 with gravity/ age shrinkage!) and I liked taller men, didn't have too much trouble finding blokes tbh!

My tallest was 6'5 (and yes I was 17 and still sad enough to note that) and if he had only gone out with women 6'5 or taller his dating pool would be pretty small!

Even DH at 6'1, the amount of women in the UK that height or taller is pretty low!

Did your tall male friends really all totally rule out any women who weren't at least as tall as them? That is pretty unusual!

I have seen threads from women a certain shape / type asking if they should tailor their profile around a bit and the general consensus was to be honest and put some full length pics.

People can’t help how they look, granted but also people can’t help who they are attracted to. If their dating pool is too narrow then they won’t find anyone so they will have to figure it out for themselves, either stay single or be a bit more open 🤷🏼‍♀️

It all depends on what you're attracted to doesn't it? Some women like tall men, some people prefer a certain body type, hair colour etc. Different strokes for different folks.

Loosely translated- 6' on OLD actually means 5'9

I like a man to be taller than me (I'm 5ft 10) as that's what I find attractive, I also prefer dark haired men. However if I was attracted to someone my height or a bit shorter & or blonde I wouldn't discount them. DH is dark & 6ft 2, would love him to be 6ft 4 but hey no ones perfect especially not me!

I'm attracted to taller men. We're allowed to go for what we're attracted to. If anything i've realised that as I've got older. Attraction is extremely important.

As for lying about their height, I actually think that a lot of people don't lie, they just genuinely believe they are the height they say they are, probably because they know loads of men the same height who say they are 5"11 or whatever when they're not...so they genuinely believe that.

In my experience most short men say that they're 5 foot 9....so if someone told me they were that height I would think they were way smaller!!

you’d be amazed how few people actually know how tall they are, it’s like they’ve just plucked them out of the air mostly, rofl

I'm constantly told i'm much taller than my height because someone else is 'x'. I'm 100% on my height due to a past career.

Anyone is allowed to fancy who they like. Personally for me i am tall so all my relationships have been with women who are 5.10-5.11 and a size 10. I have plenty of female friends who i’ve never fancied - including my oldest who i’ve known 45 years but she had always been to short and too curvey for me.

In my experience most short men say that they're 5 foot 9....

Grabbing a notepad and a pen....

Always said i'd only date tall guys - my now boyfriend is 5"8 (I am 5"7) and I am BESOTTED. And I am more attracted to shorter blokes in general now.
He has had every joke/insult thrown at him about his height over the years. I've never seen it bother him (possibly because he's never once been short of female attention in the 15 years i've known him, which is also true of all the other 'petite' men I know!)

“I'm constantly told i'm much taller than my height because someone else is 'x'. I'm 100% on my height due to a past career.”

Yep, lol, I’m really tall because loads of people are 5ft 8 and are visibly shorter than me... I’m 5 ft 7.5 accurately measured multiple times...

So for the op

Whether you fancy someone or not is v personal and not a matter of rules/ right/ wrong

If you fancy him and like him, go for it

It doesn't sound like this guy is shorter than you

If he is then you might get some looks/ haha comments but so what

The lying is not so great but if it's s compulsory piece of info I can see why he did it.

If he's 5'9 and put 5'11 that's one thing.
If he's 5'5 and put 5'11 that's a very different story!

Good luck op!

@Wherearemymarbles

Anyone is allowed to fancy who they like. Personally for me i am tall so all my relationships have been with women who are 5.10-5.11 and a size 10. I have plenty of female friends who i’ve never fancied - including my oldest who i’ve known 45 years but she had always been to short and too curvey for me.

Jesus

Most women prefer a tall man, but it seems that most men prefer a slim woman, so fair enough I suppose. Exactly. I don't know why certain posters are pretending that most men don't have a preference for slim women.

I don't personally care about height at all. My tallest bf was 6,2, my shortest was 5,2, and my current is 5,10. I'm 5,1 - might feel different if I was taller I guess. I went on a date from OLD once with a man who was much shorter than his profile stated. The date was fine and I didn't care about his height, but I didn't see him again because of the lying. If he hadn't lied I would have seen him again. Someone upthread asked "what have men got to lose by lying?" If they've conned a woman into going on date with them when they don't meet a criteria she's specified then they have wasted her time. I don't care whether they don't have anything to lose. If she's said no shorter men then no means no. You are straight away showing that you don't think her time is valuable and you don't respect her boundaries. So no sympathy for men (or anyone really) who lies on a profile to trick someone into a date. That for me is an instant deal breaker.

In my experience most tall men are quite skinny with spindly arms/legs, which does nothing for me as I'm an arms/shoulders girl. Yes you get the odd buff one but they're quite rare. I would prefer a man of average height with a good build.

@LimerickTherapy 5'6 is quite tall for a woman. Certainly over average I think?

Wow such a great response ! And a very mixed bag of replies...I'm going to go on another date as I did like him and my obsession with height hasn't really got me anywhere so far as I'm still single after years of dating

Very interested in the statistics response, I always look at height and then swipe regardless of how they look...maybe I am missing out on that special person because of one thing I assume I want

Yeah I wouldn't describe 5'6 as petite fir a woman either Limerick

I think petite is 5ft3 and under, I'm 5ft4 and not classed as petite

In the shops petite is 5'3 and under.

It's not just about height but cut.

Shorter sleeves. Narrower shoulders. Waist in the right place.

I'm on the cusp but the first time I tried on petite clothes I was WOW! they actually fitted.

I've seen people (who are not nice) on here say eg why do petite sizes go to larger sizes that's rubbish by definition.

No. Being larger does not make your arms and legs get longer, your shoulders wider, your waist shift down by 2 inches.

Sorry rant :D

I am 5'3 (maybe 5'2 now) and at top end of petite. It means short. 5'6 is quite tall I would say! Although women are definitely getting taller.

Ah op maybe ignore the height and look at the other bits?

It is an area a lot of men would lie about anyway probs.

I've not been dating since pre smart phones so my advice prob shit. Although I did try to help a friend... We got one in the pub and I was swiping.. nope nope nope nope nope. And they said what's wrong with him? Etc. Just. Nope.

Internet dating is pretty shit for women from what I can see.

If it wasn't for lockdown I'd say the time honoured thing of try some stuff irl. Sorry I know that's v out of date. And not doable at the mo.

It’s the lying about height which would bother me. It would be annoying to spot this kind of little lie or insecurity about oneself the first time you literally lay eyes on them in real life.

It would bother me because it indicates someone is willing to manipulate me into a date situation because their insecurity about their height is a bugbear to them & this somehow trumps a potential online date’s right to pick & choose their match based on actual facts.

It’s like what if they were a “coordinator” and just added a little to make themselves a “manager” or instead of living in Bondi, they actually live in Randwick or something. It seems shallow to lie about these things

I am 5 foot and sometimes people have confident characters & a cool personality & they will seem “big” to me despite being short. Also someone could be a stockier build and appear huge next to someone more lithe in stature.

It’s not the height, it’s the deception which means I would immediately bin them. What other little things are they willing to lie about in order to seem more appealing?

You’re short, get over it. We all have physical features we dislike. It doesn’t mean we lie. This would turn me right off & instantly get THE ICK

Ps When I went to London 1st time in 2005 TopShop petite range was a life changer ! First time getting a little blazer & not having to roll up the arms ! The jeans you don’t have to take up, the sit perfectly at your ankle & you don’t loose the shape at the bottom

Don’t tell me the TopShop in Sydney is real - it may say TopShop & sell the brand but that is NOT a TopShop. It’s a disappointment is what it is !