I do not how to react to my British colleague courtship

[superstar5219]

Hi ladies (and gents)
Was brought to this site as I’ve been living in the UK for not so long and I have a British colleague at work interested in me.
Issue is this is the first time a British guy shows such a deep interest in me, good thing is I like him, he's posh, I guess a middle class man, middle 30's, lots of matches between both of us, BUT…..and I don’t know how to react to his courtship.
I know he is interested in me as plenty of websites say his hints/behaviours are the typical British man hints/behavior to let you know they are interested in a woman...He's constantly following me around, keeping eye contact, arranged with me private conversations in the kitchen of our workplace.
However, I come from a latin country, where men are too intrusive, quite direct and straightforward since the very beginning of the courtship process, this means they lead and women's opinion are barely taken in account during the courtship.
So, what should I do? I feel petrified as he's extremely handsome and I don't know what to do or what to say in front of him as he is obviously waiting for my reaction to his approach/courtship.
I sent him some skype messages telling him I wanted to speak to him to break the ice after so many eye contacts and him following me around, he agreed to have chats in the kitchen (as I previously said) then the next week I sent him an email asking for a time but he didn't reply, he just kept the eye contact with me.
Why didn't he reply? He keeps avoiding replays to my emails but sends me subtle invitations to speak to him in the kitchen.
Need to say he's extremely shy too, got red/blush last Friday when I went to his desk asking for help for job task as he has more experience and more years in the company.
What should I do? How should I react to his approach?

Ask if he fancies going for a drink after work?

You're both very shy so I would have thought the email approach would have worked....strange he didnt reply.

You have to be a bit braver! Be a bit more obvious you like him so he has the confidence to progress things. Could you ask him to grab a coffee at lunch or something?

Perhaps he's just keeping an eye on you because he's terrified?

He might be conciliator blushing when speaking to you? I’d agree with the drink after work or find out if you have any common interests and arrange an informal date.

Or you could go on lunch together? Nip to the local chippy and get to know each other over traditional fish chips and a dandelion and burdock?

Conscious of *

Eye contact?

I wouldn’t be completely sure he’s interested if he’s not replying to your emails.

Work email may be monitored.

Arrange to meet outside work.

Not the red blush!

In one of your kitchen meetings, ask him about what he enjoys doing in his free time. Take an interest in something he says and tell him you're doing it next weekend. If he doesn't bite your hand off (not literally, that isn't part of British courtship rituals) then move on as he is probably in a relationship.

What happens in Latin countries when a guy at work fancies you? This is intriguing!

He might just be embarrassed that you're staring at him though. Invite him out for a drink after work. Don't chase him though. If he is interested in you he will make it clear. Mixed signals usually means he is not single and / or not interested.

Quite often people have "work wives", basically lots of intimate conversations at work but never goes outside of work. They have an actual wife or girlfriend at home. Beware. Don't get the wrong idea.

Hi ladies!
Thanks for your replays.

I need to dig more on his current marital status as per some of your answers.

@BitOfFun
He's terrified of what?

It sounds like he might already be in a long term relationship and is not available. if that is true, it is poor form for him to flirt with you and make constant eye contact. He would not be a good person.

Of you bombarding him with emails and collaring him in the kitchen?

@Lweji
I thought exactly the same, emails are monitored… he’s been there for 13 years, I’ve been for 6 months so far, so he knows something I don’t know.

All work emails, Skype etc should be kept by the company for 7 years

Suggest, you keep your conversations at work professional

Go for a coffee outside work

Blushing doesn’t mean anything, I do it whenever someone I don’t know well talks to me. Combination of nerves and social anxiety, and feeling uncomfortable with a stranger.

@BitOfFun
He was quite happy when I sent him both emails, I could noticed that on his face, our desk are facing each other by kind of 18 yards.
And he was the one that suggested the kitchen, not me. And I haven't gone to the kitchen with him yet.
Actually, I came across him in the kitchen because I went for a coffee and he did it again, staring at me while he was speaking to another colleague, I didn't do anything, just went for my cofee.

This is a bit strange.

A guy looking at you does not mean that he likes you

Men look at many women

@0ffwithherHead364
There you are, so this mean if our chats go beyond professional and are read by the wrong person or things go wrong can be easily used in a potential harassment/sexual harassment complaint/grievance.

I wouldn’t do this to him, it’s not my nature, but as he doesn’t know me he may be protecting himself by no replaying, quite smart.

He looked at you
And talked to you in the kitchen.

That means nothing!

OP, I'd agree with others - you are fine here to invite him for a coffee outside work, or lunch, or a drink. He won't think you're being pushy or bold - it's quite acceptable for women to do that here. It will be easier to find out about him/his personal situation/whether he's really interested away from work.
Also, if he says no, then he's not interested.
It's a bit weird that he stares at you so much and doesn't say anything, imo.

...he 'follows you around' ...lol ok. Sure he's not just creepy? Lol.