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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

NEW FAB AND GLAM

952 replies

Dior · 17/08/2007 13:32

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LilyLoo · 17/08/2007 13:36

Well done Dior, although i don't come on that much it's nice to know your all still around
PC i cannot believe him, Has he no concept of what being a 'dad' means ?

Dior · 17/08/2007 13:38

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Baffy · 17/08/2007 13:39

Brill thanks Dior

Dior · 17/08/2007 13:42

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LilyLoo · 17/08/2007 13:43

I really good thanks, starting to expand now though !
We just got over our first year since i find out about dp! It was on Monday when we arrived back from our hols. I can't believe a year has gone since all that happened. I t was werid i knew the date, time and everything, i suppose i'll never forget it. I just said to dp it's a year today you know and he never said anything just looked quite sheepish. It's not something we talk about anymore and it seems to be ok that way. I never thought i would be 5 months pg though this time last year. Didn't think i'd ever eat or sleep again!
Hows things with you ?

Dior · 17/08/2007 13:44

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Baffy · 17/08/2007 13:47

Lily that's fantastic! Look where you are a year down the line... I'm very

It's great knowing there are happy endings out there, whatever way it goes. It was March that I actually found out H was having the affair... I wonder where I'll be next March...

LilyLoo · 17/08/2007 13:56

Princess i don't think he has it in him!
But things are different in lot's of ways it's better , i suppose it will never be perfect but i can live with that.
It's odd really as i suppose i was just one of them people who got on with things before and since this i question a lot more things and look into things more deeply if that makes sense.
I wish things could improve for you Dior.
I hope you can be happy again Baffy a year can make all the difference, i suppose i lived to tell the tale. Just your outcome will be different. Who knows which way is the right way to deal with it we just do what we think is right at the time. There's no manual is there!

Paddlechick666 · 17/08/2007 14:00

found you!

at work dior so no MSN.

lily, glad things are good with you.

re: H, i wish he realised how much I'd bloody love to just leave him alone!

i wish i could just walk away and get on with the rest of my life and vainly hope that i meet someone worth it one day.

have to say tho, don't have much faith in that happening. after 24 years of relationship disasters behind me the future hardly looks optimistic!

Baffy · 17/08/2007 14:34

pc sounds like it's about time you met your prince charming then!
he's out there somewhere I'm sure of it!!

Baffy · 17/08/2007 15:34

Oh shit!!

Don't know if I said I had a job interview this Wednesday. And it went terribly and the tests were awful and the interview was so hard!!!!

Well they just called to offer me the job!!!!!!!!! Plus a company car!!!!!!!

Finally some good news

If I take it my commute goes from 3 hours a day to 40 mins maximum! I can then get myself a new house for me and ds. I will save about £200 a month in petrol. And it has free parking on site (no more city centre parking and then having to walk for miles to get to the office!!!!)

I'm soooooooo happy!!!!!!!

TimeForMe · 17/08/2007 15:49

Congratulations!!!!

I am so very pleased for you. The start of many good things to come.

Your life begins.......

xx

Baffy · 17/08/2007 15:59

Thank you

Off home now and then I've got a night out tonight so can do some celebrating!

Catch up soon xx

Dior · 17/08/2007 16:10

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ernest · 17/08/2007 16:25

wow, just popped in for a rare update and seen your news buffy. If any one deserves a lucky break it's you. I am SO pleased to hear about your job. That's really really brilliant, and without sounding melodramatic, really, that much less commuting a day will be massively life changing, not to mention getting a place for you and ds. I am really very pleased for you. Well done and good luck xxx

ps When do you start?

contentiouscat · 17/08/2007 16:31

Oh congrats - you can get a life back now rather than spending such a chunk of it in the car!

Dior · 17/08/2007 16:32

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sugar34plum · 17/08/2007 16:49

hi all. baffy thats brilliant news congratulations xx

Pc how are you?

ernest? Dior? time for me? Im a bit behind but hoping your all ok?

Lily im so pleased your past the past! And a new baby its fantastic.

Doe sthe msn group still exist? Im back on msn but to thick to find anything!

Dior · 17/08/2007 16:50

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ernest · 17/08/2007 16:58

thanks dior, well, where are we? DH got job in milan, He assumed we would all move, I told him I not agreed, maybe in a few months (tbh stalling.... I love my home here in switzerland). We went to visit Milan - not - to make a decision. Was ok, but i do NOT want to go there, esp for the kids - millions of reasons. ANyway, as far as Milan is concerned, he's def. going, maybe Nov, we are ?????? Kids don't want to move. We are, as a couple getting on v ery well at mo. Had great holiday, despite everything.

Manage d to visit lovely mil 3 times. She's really bad. Until last week was to all intents and purposes in a coma - she's uneble to move any limbs, could not look at anyone, showed no recognition. She could open her eyes and grimace, but that's all (been in ITU for 8 weeks following op to remove brain tumour, then got 3 serious infections). Now she starting to show some movement, and some awareness & recognition, so family getting hopes up, then yesterday, found out seh's got another tumour on spinal cord at brain stem, inoperable. They can't give us any idea of time, but I guess it's not too good I love my mil so much. Hope she can at least get out of ITU.

And finally - I start work for the 1st time in 8 years on Tuesday. I'm completely teriffied. And boys go back to school on Monday, ds 2 actally starts for 1st time on Monday, ds1 turns 8 on Thursday (had a count down for the last 2 months, so I also can't wait!) so busy week ahead.

Oh and I forgot to pay the phone bill before we went away, then we got the reminders while we were away, which we, of course, didn't see, as we were away, and yesterday, for 1st time on my life, we got cut off . Particularly bad time as can't phone UK for mil updates.

how are you. Briefly read pc's post about absentee H. but would love an update on everyone else, including you of course! Things same/better/worse?

kipperthedog · 17/08/2007 20:55

Hi everyone, also found you on rare visit here these days! Hope to have a bit more time from now on to catch up with you all

Baffy, so pleased for you re job, I'm sure it'll make a huge difference. How are things atm?

Brief update on me. H and I seperating atm, finding it really hard but know it's for the best .

kipperthedog · 17/08/2007 20:56

OSJ btw

Dior · 17/08/2007 21:36

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macdoodle · 18/08/2007 10:09

Hi everyone so nice to hear some nice news for a change...
Baffy soooooo pleased for you what a difference that will make to your life - a new start sounds like...and just shows even when our self confidence is at its lowest we must be doing something right
Ernest - so sorry about your MIL nothing to say really just try and make the last days/weeks/however long count...congrats on the job ..... and about the moving only you know what is right
Lily - bit of you as I am in similar situation - my baby due Boxing Day another gorgeous girl and am just over a year since found out about affair ...H I think still wants us back and we are getting on ok but I know in my heart that I will not be able to live with it or trust him and so sad for my DC (and even for him but funny enough not for me I am ready to move on now)...but am soo glad you have worked it out for your family
Paddlechick - any news on missing H ?? hope you can just find some closure ??
Dior - look at all the wonderful outcomes it can and will be resoved one way or another - you just have to belive in YOURSELF and not be worn down ...
OSJ - nice to see you back as long as you are doing what is right for you - seperating is hard but sometimes is best way

Hope that is everyone sorry if missed anyones news ...

As for me well we carry on - OW baby is few weeks now H is seeing baby - no idea what relationship with OW is like don't ask but don't trust her or him (know he went with to register baby his name as father on birth cert but not used as surname for baby TG)....can't deal at all don't want to know- told him don't want DD to know until after my baby is born she is so excited about being big sis think will take shine off for her and really can't see rush to tell her ??
We are friendly but very superficial don't really talk came with me for 20 week scan but TBH he just looked so sad and I feel sad for this LO as well and sad for him he just threw it all away and now he has to deal with not being with any of his children (not to mention what will happen with business)..
As for me am trying to concentrate on new baby and DD, and am having lots of work to house to make some more room (new kitchen ) and am having exactly what I want no compromises for H.....TBH think I am ready to move on but am going to wait till after baby born to confront H about moving on (financially divorce etc).....so a year later and well better in myself and have my much longed for 2nd baby - the rest will just have to wait

HappyWoman · 18/08/2007 13:09

Hi everyone
At last a new name for a new phase of my life. You will not believe where i am - i am in america on holiday with the children alone!!

H could not get 3 weeks off work so i came on my own and i go and pick him up from the airport this afternoon!!

I have driven for the first time on my own (on the wrong side of the road) - wow i am still on a bit of a high from it. We are in a fabulous villa with a pool and a short walk from the most amazing white powder sand. Sorry must not go as you will all be jealous.

We actually came here last year (not the same villa) when it was going on and i have a few ghosts to exorsize(sp feeling a bit thick at the moment). Her H actually found out while we were here (well she let him find out as i am sure she hated the fact that we were having such a good time and she wanted to put the pressure on him).

I have also got a job i love and it fits in with childcare ect.

Ernest - i have been thinking about you and great to hear about the job. I would take it very slowly where the move is concerned - i once moved to a place i was not 100% sure of and i really wish i hadnt it turned out to be the worst thing ever (but at least both h and i agreed on it). Dont agree to anything you may regret - he needs to respect you and the boys enough now take your needs into account. Difficult i know but just know that i am here for you.

Great news baffy - i think you have turned a corner now and it will be better from now on.

Hi to everyone else too - i get confused with everyones story but i will try and keep up.
i am not always online here - too much to do and the signal is not great so may not get back to you for a while.

take care everyone
catch up in sept.

HW