Sorry - didn't answer your questions there. Ds is absoultely great and I love him more every day (if that's possible!)
Things with H are weird. We get on well. Things are amicable between us. But he's finding it hard to accept NM and has started making comments as though he thinks he may have made a mistake... I really feel it may be too late though. I've lost all respect for him - he's had 12 months to realise he made a mistake and countless opportunities to just say/do the right thing and try to put it right.
But all he can say (still!) is that 'he doesn't know'... and I'm fed up of that now. If he doesn't know if he wants me by now then it's too late really - I'm with someone who definitely does! And it's such a nice feeling
If he came back now I think I'd forever feel that I should be somehow 'grateful' to him for coming back and I think that would just lead to resentment. He don't think he realises just how much he's lost. I think he will realise it soon though. But like I say, it will be too late