Dating thread 172: from developing a rhino hind to finding love in the unusual places...the rollercoaster of dating!

[CodLiverOil556]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

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Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item. 😘

Oh that's lovely @KermitRulesOK. Although I think MrSG is, in fact, the best kisser ever. I'll move over and make some room here on the smitten bench for you. Hopefully you'll be DTD soon 😉.

Incidentally, MrSG is also 5'6 and I think it's just the right height.

There are loads of frogs (and, yes, some roads) out there. But there are some lovely ones.

Sobbing loudly in your car is much better than doing it in the canteen/office/anywhere where there are other people really, @NoMoreWeepingAndWanking.

@WooMaWang it's on the cards for tomorrow night and I can't wait - we're both a bit nervous about our bodies but I'm sure the more we get into the better it'll be

@NoMoreWeepingAndWanking aww sweetheart, it'll get easier - you just need time. In my experience the more you let whatever emotion out the better it is.

I think it's interesting as people often write off shorter men but actually some of these recent successes are with shorter men. My FWB must be about 5ft 7 and works perfectly even though when I swipe, I don't tend to look at anyone under 5ft 10. Might be where I'm going wrong.

In other news, ex partner has split with his gf. No doubt she has realised the extent of his alcoholism and he is continuously calling me begging me to stay here. Such a stress.

Mr Ad is only a bit taller than me too (probably about 5 8/9") and shorter than I would usually look for but works fine 😊

@Eesha my exh broke up with the OW a few days ago and texted me to let me know. Two years too late, unfortunately and I hope he is suffering.

It seems that there's an epidemic of exes' GF's realising the error of their ways and dumping them on this thread. I can't say I feel hugely sympathetic about it.

I'm obviously sympathetic to those of you currently being bothered by the newly dumped exes. But the exes themselves deserve to feel like shit really.

@WooMaWang thing is he doesn't want us together per se, he just wants to move in here as convenient but I've already had two mutual friends say no as he will never leave. I'm a sucker for a sob story and feel bad for him but the drink rules his life. Plus I think will really confuse the kids if daddy moves back in....

I might try looking at slightly shorter men now!!!

Mr G is an inch shorter than me, and it makes zero difference.

Do you all do a lot of messaging back and forth with your new irons? I'm finding myself holding back from getting into the quick back and forth because it's often what I miss the most when it's gone, so I try and play it cool and just text to arrange actual meet ups, but then I wonder if they think I'm not that interested because I don't message much...

I'm a bit messenger - in fact I've sacked irons off that don't message me often enough. It takes seconds to ping a message off to someone but I also understand being busy at work and stuff as I am sometime

I know, I have also sacked irons off for ignoring my messages on whatsapp. I'm not doing that, I always reply but I'm not encouraging long conversations or sending frequent messages because I'm trying to play it cool! Can't seem to find the balance though!

Lol! Maybe try the not so cool and see where it gets you - from the off MrM have sent long messages

My usual go-to is back and forth on whatsapp and it got me nowhere - last guy I had an fwb thing with for a few weeks just faded away and I really missed the messaging. So this time I haven't given anyone my number and I'm just replying to messages on the apps as and when. Let's see what happens 🤷‍♀️

I'm big on messaging too- I do meet up with irons quickly as prefer that. But when I'm chatting with them pre and post meeting, lots of messaging.

Do I go out with Mr Hendricks tonight? I kind of really want to, but then there's the effort of getting ready... although I like doing that, it'll be a rush tonight. I hate it when it's a rush...

Also it'll be third date and so given it's only meant to be casual then is sex going to be on the cards? I never done the seeing two guys at once thing so feels a bit weird...

STBX was telling me, when he told me about his girlf moving up here, about how there had been a cock up eith her leaving her (apparently) abusive ex and maybe i should post on mumsnet to see ehat they thought. The new school cobtacted old school to ask about the kids moving and the old school contacted the girlfriend's husband to ask him what was going on.

Now in times past when she was just his friend i was very sympathetic ti her issues and full of friendly and helpful advice. My response now she's the bitch who took my husband was "well technically the school didn't do anything wrong. He is the children's father" then i looked at him blankly.

Why the fuck does he think i care? A very bitter, secret part of me actually hoped her ex would beat the shit out of both the cheating bastards.

My friends give their relationship less than 2 years. We'll see.

@NoMoreWeepingAndWanking My ex and his OW made it to 1 year and 10 months.
I think the reality of getting involved with a married father of two finally got too much for her and she was jealous of the time my ex was spending with HIS children.
Next time maybe he won't go for a woman 13 years his junior and she a married man with responsibilities. Twats.

@NoMoreWeepingAndWanking 9 hours!!! Sex with someone new is really awkward, I genuinely don’t know how people manage to have sex during ONS without it being a cringe fest.

@KermitRulesOK aww, that’s lovely.

@WooMaWang I’m so pleased for you, i hope the settling in period is okay.

Haven’t seen MrNN in about two weeks, I’ve grown a big moustache as part of my halloween/gay christmas outfit on Saturday, looking suitably creepy, lucky boy.

Thanks for the kind words. I really appreciated them. Feeling a lot less shit now. Just trying to remind myself he’s still the selfish, unavailable opportunist he always was.
I’d had a coffee date on Saturday with a guy I really clicked with on text but in person there was just no spark and I think I kept comparing him to Fireman.

😔
I was mortified looking over those texts. I’m like putty in his hands... what an ego stroke. 😡

Wondering if I might shelf the idea of dating for a bit. There is just one iron I’m chatting to at the moment and if he doesn’t ask to meet soon I think I’m done with it all for now.

Only skipping in and out. Hope you are ok @NoMoreWeepingAndWanking

@KhaleesiTargaryen delete all the messages now. Reading them again isn't going to help. Do we have to find where you live and seize your phone?

Inthetempest what did you decide?

I think part of my problem is that I can quite quickly write people off if they're not very entertaining and then I can't really be bothered with back and forth "how was your day" and so on.

Mr SH (25 yo) has said he'd really like to see me again (after cancelling our Sunday meet up) and he's so entertaining that I'm drawn back in even though I feel that he's probably going to mess around quite a bit and it's already all on his terms. But he's so funny and the chat is so good that the others just pale in comparison!

@saltysally 😂 I’ve just deleted it all, thanks. Feel better already.

Peanut he's not replied to my last message yet... I wonder if he is waiting for me to message him about going out tonight..... because tbf he asked me earlier and I wasn't exactly committal about it...

I have a really nice new dress that I quite fancy wearing out though. Shall I message him?

What are you going to do about Mr SH? I mean I'd probably meet him again if I were you... but I probably am not that sensible!