Am I right in thinking this is strange

[ceme]

DH claims to have a booked a hotel room for his male friend for tonight (friend travelled over last month, stayed one night couple weeks ago). He went straight from work to meet friend and go out for dinner. Came home just before 1am to drop their leftovers and then left to say he staying at hotel with friend. I think that’s odd. What you guys think?

Gay? When I was in the process of coming out to myself I used to stay overnight with the woman I went on to have a seven yr relationship with. I explained the overnight stays in various ways to other people.

I'd be staking out the hotel. Sitting in the lobby with the lifts in view from 8ish

^^This.

A double bed booking? No way is that innocent.

But he's being so obvious... does he just not give a shit about being found out?
So sorry OP...you deserve much better than being treated like that...no one deserves to be treated like that.

Definitely sounds as though something dodgy going on OP. Hope you're at the hotel now, what an awful situation for you. Can only imagine how sick you feel. ☹️ 💐

Gosh, I think a lot of people have been watching too much telly.

You don't need to stake out the hotel, that's just insane. You know he's up to something, you know he's booked a hotel and his story makes no sense, you know he's cheated before - and your relationship is for shit.

You don't need to waste your time or effort staking out the hotel like a nutter.

Stay home, pack up his crap and start your divorce on Tuesday.

Why wont the hotel put you through.. they have no right to intervene with calls especially if it's an emergency

I would not go to the hotel!

The point is he’s already lied. Told the op he is staying with a friend and not mentioned the hotel. The op doesn’t have to have proof of anything else.

Hang on, why is he bribing leftovers back? That's weird!

Could you contact friend and casually ask him about your husbands whereabouts?

He's sharing a double bed with a male friend ?

Call hotel tell them it's an emergency and put you through to dh.

Do you have children at home?

Call the hotel and ask to be out through now - can't possibly be too early now?!

So weird I don’t know what to say. He’s either gay or having an affair. One or the other. I would demand to know the truth when he gets home. Pack his bags whilst you wait and chuck him out whatever.

They might be planning to have an all nighter, bit of MDMA?

Unless she has concrete proof he will find a way to worm his way out of it.
I'd stakeout.
Definitely sounds weird

Sending strength.

I hope you’re ok, OP ❤️
Unfortunately, it’s more common than people seem to think for a man to suppress his sexuality and feelings for men, and end up married with children. It’s happened in my own family.
Did you go to the hotel? I would, and if you’re able to take pictures if he does leave with someone. It will be precious evidence if a divorce ever turns messy.
Thinking of you

@treeplop I thought the same thing.

How ridiculous that the hotel won't put a call through. What would happen in a real emergency?

A double bed with a friend?! No way that's never right is it. Stake out is your only option. Bring a flask of coffee with you and watch the entrance/exit.

A double bed for a guy mate? They aren't 13 year old girls topping and tailing at a sleepover.

It does seem odd but if he has form and yet so blatantly disregards how you feel and doesn't make sure you are comfortable, feel secure etc then even if this is innocent, that's the bigger issue.

As he's cheated before and you know you can't trust him, I wouldn't bother doing a stake out. I'd see a solicitor and divorce him. Then be really glad he was out of my life and I never had to deal with his nonsense again.

I hope all is innocent op good luck x

Hang on, the friend just stayed last week?
Does the friend have a partner you could get in touch with?