Decided to get pregnant before divorce

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So before you guys start judging me, I have been going back and forth in my mind about this for quite a while. So I've been married for nearly 2 years now and have a 7 month old DS, it's been extremely difficult in my marriage which resulted in us depressing for 5 months with no contact what's so ever.
Long story short we've reconciled due to family and have now decided to give it ago.
It's been a month now of us living back together and I can honestly say that I do not love him at all!! Now more than ever it's clear to me that he isn't the one that I'd want to spend the rest of my life with.
So I've decided to seek divorce but before having the chat with him I'd try to conceive as I want DS to have a sibling form the same father. I mean who knows how long I'd find another partner, I'd never want DS to grow up alone. Regardless I'll be a single mother anyway so 2 kids to me won't make that much of a difference.
I know that you guys must be thinking I'm crazy, but I'd rather get having kids out the way rather than meeting someone in 5 years time and having to constantly think about giving DS a sibling. The plus side is that they'll have each other. Has anyone been through this? Am I crazy for thinking like this ? There's no way that I'd want to spend the rest of my life with my husband so they're won't be another chance.
I need as much advice as I could get, I've been thinking about this Non stop.

Separating **

Is this something you'd discuss with your dh first? Or would it be like an 'accident' and he'd have no idea it was planned?

Tell your husband, he has a right to know what he's signing up for if you have another child together. He might agree.

What does your husband think of this plan?

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Do you think your new baby will thank you for being so selfish in bringing him/her into the world without having a father in their life?
And you don’t love him, but you’ll have sex with him to have a baby? Wtf is wrong with you? 🙄....

Your husband has a right to all the information.

It would be totally wrong to trick him into supporting a second child with you when you have zero intention of staying with him.

Based on your post alone I think that’s incredibly selfish and unfair on your husband ! If you chat openly about it and he agrees well fair enough but to be tricked in this manner is simply despicable

I've decided to seek divorce but before having the chat with him I'd try to conceive

So, you want to "trick" him into another baby whilst he thinks you have a future and then divorce him when you're pregnant. And you can't see any problem with that at all...?

Jesus, it's all about you. What if he doesn't want to support TWO children that live apart from him.

I can't believe you are ok with this deception. Horrible thing to do.

What do I think of your plans? It’s fraud. Presumably you’re going to claim maintenance from him, so it’s financial gain on top of the dishonest and generally shitty nature of it.

Are you really prepared for the potential (and very long term) fallout from this too? You already don’t get on. Exactly how fraught do you want to make your interactions with stbx on hand overs etc?

At the end of the day your married so theoretically in a committed relationship even if you have decided it may not be long term for you. Ask yourself if you can live with your decision should he find out, whether having 2 children to care for is quite as easy as you think, how old you let the baby be before you left and if your DH actually earns enough to financially provide fairly for 2 children. I appreciate your urge for a second child but you may want to consider these things first. DM tried to convince DF that me and DB were just 2 happy accidents when she clearly stopped taking the pill to conceive. This only came out when we were teenagers and pointed out the convenient timing.

Selfish.....your DH will never be able to build a real relationship with that child if he's tricked into it and kicked out the moment two lines appear on a BFP test

Bet you'd go after him for child maintenance on both kids too

No, I don't think you are crazy. I don't know how badly things have broken down in your marriage or if you are on friendly terms but just don't love him anymore but if you think you can make it work and it is right for you and DS then I wouldn't judge. There is nothing wrong in wanting a sibling for your DS and making your own little family. Lots of single women have children with unknown sperm doners the only difference in your case is that you know yours. Good luck op

Morals, OP, morals.

I think if he is fully informed and onboard with it then fine.

So you married 2 years ago. Got pregnant around 8 months later. Split up after baby was born. Now back together for a month. Did you ever love him? Or did you regret marrying him as soon as you said I Do?

Don't trick him, I am all for supporting women whose partners wall away and pay no Child Maintenance but you give women a bad name

Are you going to trick your husband into doing this? If so, consider whether you would happily con another person out of 115,000 GBP, that apparently being half the cost of supporting a child until the age of 21 in the UK.

I think you need to be 100% clear in your intentions that you wish to fall pregnant before separating. He needs to know this and as other posters have said, he may be on board with it. That being said, it can take up to 12 months of regular sex when ttc even if both partners are perfectly healthy in the fertility department so you and he both need to know what you are signing up for.

I know someone who did this and it delayed the divorce process. She had to birth before it could be finalized. She never received support for any of their children - so what was one more? Then she successfully dated (via OLD) and remarried. Course that last "divorce child" as she was referred to never had a relationship with the dad and is in therapy.

I feel sorry for the ex husband to be and the baby. What a selfish woman. If you don’t want your children to have 2 different fathers, then have some dignity and stop at one. 🙄 ffs.

I actually regretted marrying him within the first two weeks of marriage. I'll provide a little bit of insight I think it might help with understanding my thought process. Within two weeks of marriage we got into an argument and he because physical (slapped 5x) this started to become a continuous pattern. Which eventually lead to our separation due to him not being respectful. The lack of love also comes from him not having an emotional connection with me I feel alone and sad in this relationship.
He convinced me that he'd changed which why we're where were at.
After living with him again after the separation there's no way I would spend the rest of my life with him.
And to answer everyone's questions no I won't be tricking him into a baby I'll tell him that I'd want a baby ( he has mentioned that he wouldn't mind) however what he doesn't know is that eventually I will be leaving, I just don't know when the right time would be.

That's still tricking/not being honest with him.

Awful idea. Its unethical to start. Plus it may put off other potential partners. If you then wanted to have a child with another partner you may not be able to afford it/have space in home and cars. You don't get tax credits for a third child for example which puts my partner and I off having a child together (his first but my third).

I know someone who did that. In her case, she fully supports both kids financially and her ex has no involvement in their care either. I don’t know whether he was aware of the plan but it’s worked for her little family.