Decided to get pregnant before divorce

[applecrunch92]

So before you guys start judging me, I have been going back and forth in my mind about this for quite a while. So I've been married for nearly 2 years now and have a 7 month old DS, it's been extremely difficult in my marriage which resulted in us depressing for 5 months with no contact what's so ever.
Long story short we've reconciled due to family and have now decided to give it ago.
It's been a month now of us living back together and I can honestly say that I do not love him at all!! Now more than ever it's clear to me that he isn't the one that I'd want to spend the rest of my life with.
So I've decided to seek divorce but before having the chat with him I'd try to conceive as I want DS to have a sibling form the same father. I mean who knows how long I'd find another partner, I'd never want DS to grow up alone. Regardless I'll be a single mother anyway so 2 kids to me won't make that much of a difference.
I know that you guys must be thinking I'm crazy, but I'd rather get having kids out the way rather than meeting someone in 5 years time and having to constantly think about giving DS a sibling. The plus side is that they'll have each other. Has anyone been through this? Am I crazy for thinking like this ? There's no way that I'd want to spend the rest of my life with my husband so they're won't be another chance.
I need as much advice as I could get, I've been thinking about this Non stop.

I personally think it's better than all this blended family bollocks that just doesn't work.

Just a little sweeping generalisation, huh?

Oh he's only slapped you about a bit in the past

Well that's alright then, he sounds like excellent father material

Someone saying a man can't be tricked into getting someone pregnant is naive. Especially in this case when he would trust her, she just has to say I've got the coil, take the pill etc and he would trust she is telling the truth.

If you're depressed and struggling to sleep with him I think just that alone is enough of an answer that you shouldn't be doing this.

Plus if you do meet someone else and have a child, by your reasoning of not wanting your DS to be alone/have the same dad, then the same situation would stand for the next baby with a different father so it'll be two kids with this man and two kids with the next.... is that really what you want?

Being a single mum of two (or more) is so much harder than being a single mum of one.

When I was a single mum of two I used to look at my single mum friends with one and wish I was in their position. It was easier for them to find childcare at short notice, men without kids were more likely to date them, they were able to work with much less hassle....

I would not deliberately make myself a single mum of two kids.

@applecrunch92 'a few slaps' IS physical abuse. I don't understand how you can't see that.

Every baby is different.
P

Butter fingers, posted too soon.

Perhaps your baby is an ‘easy’ one as babies go so that’s why you’re thinking you could so easily cope with two alone. You haven’t experienced a toddler yet, they are difficult as hell. I had three in the space of 2.5 years and it’s not something for the faint hearted, however ‘easy going’ your children are.

Having two Fathers on the scene isn’t a bad thing, it’s actually rather common nowadays. It’s preferable to having another child with an abusive bastard you don’t love surely.

I'm wondering if the op posted this hypothetical scenario just to get reactions, it seems so far fetched.

I mean, who seriously wants a child with someone they don't intend to stay with? It's bizarre.

This thread is completely batshit even by MN standards.

I think that you should just be happy,to have the one child in your life,and not go into this awful deception process.You seem to just wan't to set this pattern of your life, only how You wan't it to be. I don't know how you can plan your life out like this,you are dealing with people here,and not a shopping list.