Dating thread 161: (Can anybody find me) somebody to love..?

[Sunshineandflipflops]

The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

1. Develop a thick skin.
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
4. Trust your gut instinct.
5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
6. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
7. If it's not fun, stop.
8. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

AverageGuy not sure how old you are? I'm on Fab looking for a fwb and I ignore all the profiles that just have dick pics.
I'd rather see some 'normal' photos. And I don't want to read great details of someone's sexual conquests or preferences.

I also know that a lot of men lie about their age on there. The last bloke I met had knocked 8 years off his age. I confess I've brought my age down below 50 because I'm not looking for a relationship with them, so I don't think age matters so much.

But there are a lot of young, very fit looking men there. So I appreciate it's difficult to get noticed.

Sunshine naughty, naughty. But I'm happy for you that you had a good evening. What happens next is up to you. Don't let him push you into anything you don't want.

Cassettes I know age and being a grandad means nothing. Our messaging has been very nice and friendly but with zero flirtation.
My last relationship was with someone 8 years younger. Most of my friends are younger than me.
Whenever I've had a date with someone older than me, I've generally thought they were nice but I don't fancy them at all.
I'm trying to go with an open mind and the view that if we get on then he's probably worth a second date to help me decide if he's friend or phwoar!

I guess unless something/someone comes along who would make me want to not spend time with Mr SAS in that way, then I'm just enjoying myself.

Mr Art is nice but he's not doing anything to wow me and he is a bit filthy, which i'm not against but would like more than sex/sex talk with someone ideally. Then there's the living with parents/not having a car thing too.

We were just chatting about meeting up for a 4th date and the only evening I'm free this week, he isn't so I won't be able to see him for another week now anyway so not really enough to keep my undivided interest at the moment.

He sounded surprised/disappointed that I only have the one free evening this week so I told him i f he's prefer to date someone with more free time then I would understand. This is the problem when one of you has kids and the other doesn't I guess and was one of my concerns.

myold 58 this week.... pass the zimmer frame..

I'm honest about my age in all my profiles. Can't see the point in lying.

I don't have a dick pick on my public fab profile. Just some body shots (no face).

Arrgh, can't count. I should have said 57... Still feel I need the zimmer frame though..

averageguy give your head a wobble please - 57 is no age at all! I’m 57 this year and honestly feel more alive and in better shape than ever. It sounds like you are a catch, but in Fab you really have to slog away as a man, being respectful but witty etc in messages and jumping in at every opportunity. DW about size - for every Size Queen there will be women who want other things

Cassetes Thanks. I definitely don't feel 57.. I'm only about 12 in my head..

Not sure I'm a "catch" though - unless it's something you can get rid of with anti-biotics

I've started to be more pro-active on fab. using the forums etc, and have had more views, so it does seem to be about "presence". The problem is the dating apps seem to take up far too much time...

@averageguy if you describe yourself as average, and I mean as a person not anything else, you won't stand out, imo. Everyone has something special about them, we all have attractive qualities.

@MyOldBrainStoppedWorking I agree six years is not much at all. Enjoy your date!

Where/what is FAB ? Is it an app? I've googled it but there are loads of sites Fab related ...

ceebee it’s Fab Swingers, a website not an app. Best not to Google it when at work

Averageguy I agrer with Cassettes. I'm 55 now. I did okay on Fab (Imet Mr BC on there and am now happily on the loved up bench 💕) but men have to work at it a bit - definitely message like you're on a dating site, rather than chat to women like they're just something you'd fuck and run. A bit of flirting, humour and some interest in the woman as person will help - good luck!

Ginmel batshitcrazywoman thanks. I appreciate the pointers! I do try and treat the women on fab like real people (iyswim), and am always respectful, and try to be humorous (not sure it always comes across though! ) and flirty. I have at least had a few "thanks, but no thanks" messages back, which is something.

Loo update and need quick advice.

On third date with Mr Shakes. Having amazing time and want to sleep with him. Would it be bad if I suggested going to his?

@LooUpdate I think if it seems like the vibe is right then no harm.

looupdate Nothing like a spot of afternoon delight! If you are feeling it, go for it!

Might be running out of time and we're both drunk. Such a shame. It's like being an a date with my best friend that I want to fuck

@LooUpdate 😂
Next time then...

I felt like that over the weekend with Mr SAS. So I did

Hi everyone, techs question. I’ve just dipped my toe into the murky waters of online dating only to hit a snag straight away (mixed metaphors, sorry)! I signed up to POF yesterday but cannot log in at all, tried clearing cache, cookies, different browsers etc, P.C./mobile nothing. I try to reset password but no email arrives ( but I have had the confirmation of registration throughHaving googled I can see this appears to be a very common issue, have any of you experienced it? My major worry is I now have a POF profile I can never delete!

I recall tentatively suggesting going to his and it hasn't happened. That's bad right?

fmfl Silly question, are you sure you typed your correct email address in? I did this once , and never got the password reset emails... I'd just start again with a new user name.

looupdate maybe suggest again? I'm completely speaking for myself here, but I think us guys are awful at picking up "signals"..

Averageguy thanks, pretty sure it’s correct as I could swear I got a registration email from them...perhaps I’ll just give it up as a bad job and try another site! Could anyone suggest any good sites? Don’t mind a fee if it sorts out the wheat from the chaff!

fmfl there is a link to a post with descriptions of a lot of the dating sites on the thread title page, but here it is again: -

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

They are all a lottery, and OLD is a real numbers game...

Thank you, I should have rtft.

@FMFL No idea about Pof I'm afraid as I signed up once and was so bombarded with messages from weirdos that I deleted again within a day!

I paid a subscription for Match.com for 6 months and had a few dates through that but have just used Tinder and Bumble since. I think you tend to see the same people on most of them anyway to be honest.