I've largely disconnected from this thread - as a man who was on the receiving end of domestic violence and abuse from my ex-wife, the sexist comments on here from women who immediately rush to defend a woman who assaults her partner are just a little too predictable. But I have to say @TotesEmoshTerri that your comments are just beyond the pale.
You seriously believe that being assaulted by his partner "should be a wake up call" to this man?
This man, who the OP herself said does more than his fair share around the house and with the children.
This man whose only 'offence' was to be later home than he said he would be.
You actually believe that this justifies assaulting him? Not just that, but that he should learn a lesson from it?
I guess women who are assaulted by controlling and violent partners should also learn their lesson? Know their place? Be home when they're told? Not do anything outside the home?
This behaviour is how it starts. One partner feels they have the right to take out their frustrations on the other. And they accept it. Because it wasn't that bad - I wasn't really hurt - and it's a one off. Right? And I was late back, so it was probably my fault. Right? I should probably learn a lesson.
And then it happens again. And you know it's your fault, because it was last time. Any maybe it hurts a bit more this time. But you're a man. You can't be a victim of domestic abuse, right? She's just tired. Struggling. At the end of her tether. You need to do more to help her. That'll make things better. Right?
Until it doesn't. But you probably deserved it, anyway. And you're only a man.
There's a very short message that I want to give you on behalf of all victims of domestic violence when you tell us it's our fault, @TotesEmoshTerri. But I won't. Because I'm a gentleman. And a grown up. And so I know that abusive behaviour is wrong. Always. Even if the recipient has a penis.