Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Husband taking an Uber at strange time

203 replies

YoMommasMomma · 30/05/2018 13:54

I was away from home this weekend with my DD and when we returned I saw an emailed receipt from Uber (my husband uses my laptop to check his email and leaves himself logged on, we are very open with passwords and use each other computer/phone) which showed that he got a taxi from our house to another address about 15 mins away at 12:10am in the morning.

I am concerned as this seems very odd. The questions in my mind are - he has a car so why didn't he drive if he was going to meet a friend? He said he didn't go out that night (sometimes he goes to meet friends for a few drinks when we are away) so why is he lying? Did he have someone over to our house and pay for their cab home? This would be odd if it was a friend as they all drive and why would he pay for their taxi? I am worrying that he had another women over and paid for her cab home.

There was also a half drunk glass of baileys in the kitchen when I returned and it was in a wine glass. He does drink baileys but would usually drink it from a normal glass.

It is all very strange and I know I have to ask him and I am sure there is a reasonable explanation but worried there isn't one.

I also feel so pathetic for even typing this right now. I guess I really just wanted peoples opinions to see if you also think this is suspicious and if you has any ideas for what to do, other than just ask him about it. Thank you.

OP posts:
Constance88 · 30/05/2018 14:01

You are not pathetic for being concerned! It is strange but there may be a reasonable explanation. Have you just straight out asked him?

ILikeMyChickenFried · 30/05/2018 14:02

Getting a taxi at gone midnight to go out is odd to me but I wouldn't like to guess why.

You'd have thought he would have tried harder to cover for himself if he was up to no good though.

YoMommasMomma · 30/05/2018 14:02

No I haven't yet, I am worried that he will think it's silly of me to ask and will ask why I was reading the emails. We are open with each other but it was a bit nosey of me to read his Uber receipt email, there was no reason for me to read it.

OP posts:
GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 30/05/2018 14:03

If he definitely said he didn't go out then yes, I would assume someone came over and he booked them an Uber home.

The only way you will know is by asking him. As he left his email open as usual, it may well be innocent and you weren't snooping.

Have you googled the other address?

Check other uber email receipts too.

Constance88 · 30/05/2018 14:03

Sorry I have just seen that you said apart from asking him, sorry! I think if you were to ask him however, his answer may give you all you need to know. If he goes on the defensive then that is suspicious. If you don’t want to ask him and you mention you’re both open with phones etc, I’d check his phone when he was in the shower or something

Itsjustmarley · 30/05/2018 14:05

Can you see the address it went to? Suppose you can check the address out?

I mean I would be a bit suspicious of a receipt from an Uber but then your partner is saying he doesn't know anything about it. If he's lying about it anyway I doubt you'd get the truth if you asked more about it so you may have to play detective and just see where it went?

YoMommasMomma · 30/05/2018 14:05

I have googled the address and it is a residential flat as far as I can tell from google and street view. I will have to ask him Sad and as you said he reaction will be telling.

OP posts:
BettyPitts · 30/05/2018 14:05

Just ask

Mumof2boys2018 · 30/05/2018 14:08

Your just going to have to be blunt and ask. Otherwise it will play on your mind if he's got nothing to hide there won't be an issue xx

PattiStanger · 30/05/2018 14:09

Have you got any other reason to be suspicious?

The uber is concerning, the glass he used for a glass of baileys less so imo, wouldn't there be 2 glasses if he'd had someone over?

Constance88 · 30/05/2018 14:09

Go with your gut if you do ask him. Has he been shady or unfaithful before? If it seems out of character there could be an honest explanation. It seems weird for him to leave it open; can’t be trying very hard to hide it!

hellsbellsmelons · 30/05/2018 14:17

Not looking good OP to be honest.
But you never know. There could be a reasonable explanation.
If I'm honest, if I had the full address, I'd be going round there to see who it is who lives there.
But your gut is telling you something.
Always listen to it.
It doesn't feel right to you and probably isn't.
Do you have access to his devices? Phone, ipad?
Could you have a quick snoop if you are both so open and honest with this kind of thing?

TammySwansonTwo · 30/05/2018 14:18

I’m sorry OP this doesn’t sound good at all.

dirtybadger · 30/05/2018 14:18

The drink isnt too suspicious.

The uber is a bit suspicious

Lying about what he did that night seems highly suspicious...the only reason I can think would be getting an uber for a friend, who doesnt have an account? I dont have uber because we dont have it where I live, so sometimes when I visit my friend she will sort me an uber and I pay her back.

If there isnt anything more to find out, then you may as well ask him. If there are avenues for digging a bit, then dont ask until you have done that. Because if it was something suspicious he will cover it up, and you will end up very confused. If you find nothing concrete but his later answer shows he is lying about details, well...

If he says the uber is for X....it wll be pretty easy to test. Does X live there? He cant make his friend move into some womans house (if it is an OW) so I suspect he will struggle to come up with a satisfactory excuse if that is the case.

Mymadworld · 30/05/2018 14:20

I would ask who lives at xx address & see what he has to say. I think if there is anything going on the minute you tell him everything you know he will deny & know to start covering his tracks in future

YoMommasMomma · 30/05/2018 14:26

Thank you for your messages and I think I do need to do a bit more investigation and then ask him. I am not sure if I could go to the address and if I did whoever lives there're might not come or for ages. It just all seems so odd. He is usually totally trustworthy but we have been going through a tough patch recently so I am worried.

OP posts:
SymphonyofShadows · 30/05/2018 14:29

I'd look into it a bit more before I asked, and I wouldn't let on how much I knew when I did. Hope it's nothing OP.

Slapbetcommissioner · 30/05/2018 14:29

No receipt for an uber back? If not I'd assume he had someone round and paid for their uber back.

kissthealderman · 30/05/2018 14:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

YoMommasMomma · 30/05/2018 14:36

I was thinking maybe he brought weed but why would he not drive to get it? Very occasionally I know he smokes it but not at our house. Would a prostitute let him book her Uber and therefore know her address? Can't believe I am even thinking of that, this is honestly he first time I have ever been suspicious of anything he has done. Which just makes me feel worse

OP posts:
Slapbetcommissioner · 30/05/2018 15:04

My first thought would be affair to be honest.

He paid for an uber one way to a home in your local area

The drink

Saying he stayed in

I hope I'm wrong for your sake though.

Chapterandverse · 30/05/2018 16:05

If the uber was just one way then I'd say someone found their own way to yours and he booked an uber home for them.

If you have the address is there any way of finding out who lives there? Electoral roll or something?

The Baileys isn't strange - is it? But if you already have suspicions then I can see why you think it might be.

I'd just ask him if it were me.

OrangeAztec · 30/05/2018 16:15

I would ask him casually if he went out that night and if he says no say: "I thought so, my Uber account has been hacked it's charged me for a trip at midnight, I'll contact their fraud department to look into it and get my money back." That would probably force a spluttering excuse from him be if he's lying he's guilty.

SuperSuperSuper · 30/05/2018 16:15

The Bailey's isn't particularly strange, especially as there was just one glass.

The Uber is weird. It could be that he brought someone to the house after the pub or whatever, and then booked them an Uber home. Ask him who lives in that block. It could be a colleague.

isthismylifenow · 30/05/2018 16:26

What Orange said. Sorry OP it does seem a bit odd

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.