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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Blowjob every morning

213 replies

segc94 · 19/09/2017 19:23

What would you say/think if you heard a guy say 'my girlfriend/wife gives me a blowjob every morning'

I called bull shit.

OP posts:
Dahlietta · 19/09/2017 20:57

Is he a polygamist with 7 wives? One day a week - that's just about doable.

DrMorbius · 19/09/2017 20:57

don't disrespect the @anyfucker* she is awesome and I love her
OMG AF minion's.........can't think of anything worse Envy

LexieLulu · 19/09/2017 20:59

Imagine daily willy "morning breath"... clammy peen first thing can't taste nice

Oblomov17 · 19/09/2017 21:03

Why would he tell you this?

But probably true. Why not? Plenty of mn'ers claim to be rampant and have very high sex drives and apparently are having sex daily.

So why not this?

Brahms3rdracket · 19/09/2017 21:05

@DrMorbius couldn't agree more. Truly pathetic

Smeaton · 19/09/2017 21:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
segc94 · 19/09/2017 21:09

Smeaton lovely 😋**

OP posts:
BattleaxeGalactica · 19/09/2017 21:11

Nonsense on stilts. To coin a phrase.

Is this 'colleague' sixteen? Hmm

Original poster
segc94 · 19/09/2017 21:14

Battleaxe shockingly no!

OP posts:
Christinayangstwistedsista · 19/09/2017 21:15

They must have lock jaw

SweetLuck · 19/09/2017 21:16

Plenty of mn'ers claim to be rampant and have very high sex drives and apparently are having sex daily

Eh Confused I have literally never seen this!

Christinayangstwistedsista · 19/09/2017 21:17

DrMorbius

Aw you love Anyfucker really, don't you hun?

BattleaxeGalactica · 19/09/2017 21:18

They must have lock jaw

And walk round looking like Marley's ghost Grin

Christinayangstwistedsista · 19/09/2017 21:20

I prefer a nice coffee in the morning

Jux · 19/09/2017 21:21

I agree with AF. I'm sure I'm not the only one.
And there are excellent reasons why she's so well respected here.

OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow · 19/09/2017 21:23

Well my dh is lucky to get a cuppa (but it don't half make your knob sore)
I'll get me coat.

2littlemoos · 19/09/2017 21:24

That really she must be a prostitute

OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow · 19/09/2017 21:26

Oo hooo! Just seen this Babycow maybe she should learn to respect others rather than assume the worst from an innocent post. She sounds boring sorry 🤷🏼‍♀️ cute she's got fans though ☺️
Popcorn, popcorn, get ya popcorn here!

IsMyUserNameRubbish · 19/09/2017 21:31

Hopefully he means with the hairdryer.

MerryInthechelseahotel · 19/09/2017 21:33

Hey seg you sound like a right charmer not

Original poster
segc94 · 19/09/2017 21:37

Merryinthechelseahotel I do hope you've misconstrued some of my sarcasm... if not then I give up 😂 MN is not the place for me

OP posts:
Iris65 · 19/09/2017 21:37

I'd ask him how he stays so flexible. I mean most men can't even touch their toes.

Isadora2007 · 19/09/2017 21:38

Maybe she is on a high protein diet? Nice protein shake first thing! ✅

Original poster
segc94 · 19/09/2017 21:38

Iris

OP posts:
Iris65 · 19/09/2017 21:39

Since he specifies wife or girlfriend I would tell him he was doing it wrong and offer to draw a diagram.

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