Onit's still on it! Thread 3

[onitlikeacarbonnet]

Hello to anyone who's still here

Links to previous threads.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2658829-Anyone-up-DH-is-leaving-me

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2690159-Anyone-up-DH-is-leaving-me-follow-up-thread-Onits-on-it

I'm carrying on with this as I'm certain I'd be in a much unhappier state without the support I've received here.
This has become my journal of sorts and I hope it's something I can look back on in time to see how far I've come.
I also hope it helps to document the truth of my situation for the future and perhaps, if read by others, will offer help and hope to them too.

Onit you need to take deep breaths.
As already said, meds take time to work. Initially it can feel worse rather than better. The key for now is perseverance. You will reel the benefits once your system realigns.
At the moment you're overwhelmed. Look what you've coped with so far? And you haven't just got through it- you have been stellar. Magnificent even. Whatever happens next, you will get through it and it won't ever be as bad as you anticipate.
Do you write lists?
I find lists to be a great way to deal with practicalities when things get on top of me.
Write a to do list with the most important at the top- put your personal care/shower time on the list. Work through it slowly one at a time and tick it off.
I know at the moment it must feel like you're dragging your carcus through treacle but it will get better.

You need to get a grip not just for the little onits but for yourself.
You deserve to be looked after. You are your own best friend, please take care of yourself

My suggestion for the list:

have bath (my preference, I run the bath so it's there, then I am more likely to actually get in, though I might have to run more hot by then (!)) or shower - (I used to wait till I had a moment of feeling like one, then Run to shower before feeling wore off)

review your supplies
rest up, slob around
get book tomorrow as planned
rest up, slob around

Well you are at the exact same stage as me Christmas wise.
I've got to get food for Christmas dinner, 5 presents still to buy, (one is homemade so I need to finish the fucking thing),everything to wrap for Christmas plus DD's birthday, food to get for DD's party, deliver some presents for some people.

Been to the girls football this morning now slobbing around putting it all off.

I'm in a minute going to do some lists do each day until Christmas so I will make myself do it.

First off, need to jump in the shower as didn't have time this morning.

Come on onit, you can get in with me

Will then today buy 3 of the 5 presents, and deliver at least one.

Tomorrow as much food shop as can be done at this point and remaining present purchase and delivery.Work on the homemade item.

Listen, Christmas was always going to be a) a bastard-given what's happened this year and b) potentially a time of year that could sink you-it's so over hyped and over emotional on top of everything else... You have done so so well. One week tomorrow and Christmas is done and things can start getting back the the new normal as far as possible. You've got this, you can do it.

(But also cut yourself some slack-ad's are no joke-it pretty strong medication and if effects everyone differently-make you to do lists, but include, time to rest up-at the top of them).

Good that you have a friend round-that always helps, when I've been
Low, in that it forces me to get dressed at least.

Thinking of you onit-and so proud of all you've achieved so far.

Onit, you have done so much more than me !!! I make my own Xmas cards, & I have just about made them, tomorrow I will write the bastards & then Monday in the post..... (they will be late !)
tra la la......
The ONLY things that really need doing on your list. are
1, shower, clean teeth, clean clothes
2, sort out kids presents (have you told them you're not feeling well ?)
3 make sure there is something for Xmas, a chicken is fine ! you don't have to do the whole turkey malarky. the Dcs won't know the difference & they will be having it again anyway.

1. STOP knocking yourself.You have been a legend of reasonableness inspite of the ongoing bullshit LCB continues to throw at you. & As PP said, only 7 more days & its over. Give these meds a chance, if it doesn't improve, get back to Dr.

Friend has been and gone. House is a bomb site. But it doesn't matter. Dcs in front of a movie. Pasta for tea. Bath and bed.
I will go through the box of gifts tonight if I do nothing else. And hang up the washing.
Dcs have a party tomorrow so I'll dump and run and go to shops for anything missing. Then head back with them after the party to get LCBs thing.
I'll get a list done. I usually have one and this week I didn't. Obviously I don't function without it

My brain feels like treacle. I've lost 2lbs this week (not a bad thing) becausecmy appetite has disappeared. Though I have eaten a sandwich, a yum yum and mini doughnut which is better than yesterday.

Thanks for the cheerleading. I really need it right now. Overwhelmed isn't the word. I just want my mum

Yes dc know I'm under the weather. They're being good but I'm letting them away with murder too.

Of course tonight Dd decides to be difficult about going to bed. My fault entirely. She's overtired and I didn't get them upstairs early enough.
I've had a cuppa though and another yum yum and got the washing hung up at least.

Did I hear "cuppa"? Take care x

Just keep on keeping on. You're doing amazing.

Ive been through the already bought stuff. I've written a list of things still to get.
Feeling a little less overwhelmed. Thank you

Glad to hear you sounding better, just thought I'd pop another little bit of encouragement your way to start your day!

You're doing well. We all put ourselves, as women, under so much pressure anyway at Christmas, and you've got everything else that you're dealing with on top of that. Be kind to yourself.

Could LCBs book be ordered online? Saving a trip round the shops?

Thank you.
Feeling very rough this morning.
But I've no option but to get on as most things are dc related today.

But omg this is hard.

Too late for online now and they need to choose. I'll be going to the supermarket so he'll get whatever is there.
I used to put so much thought into his gifts. Ever tag had a message with a little clue to what was inside.

Fucker

Book bought. Even got him one I know he'll love as opposed to what dc were looking at.
But it was picked in less than 5 mins. We went for a bacon roll after
I'm proud of myself for not missing dcs swimming lessons then went straight to a party after that.
Went back to the shops and picked up a few more bits so I'm much less frazzled.
I have managed to bugger my back. I might have to take the first diazepam to get through the night if it doesn't ease up. I'm walking like John Wayne here

Counselling tomorrow. I bought her a wee gift ( just a notebook and pens) but wondering if that's inappropriate?

Not inappropriate at all onit. Just another indication as to what a lovely thoughtful lady you are.

Look at what you've accomplished over the last few days. Can you imagine what you're going to be capable of when this shit is holding you down?

When the smog clears onit you will conquer whatever you choose to.

Well done

It's times like this that I wish Tesco did a range of presents for LCB. Clap cream, twat face soap, "I'm a nob" underpants.

I guess it must be overwhelming to prepare for Christmas, I can't do anything constructive but if I could then know that I would (I'd even do your ironing!)

*isn't

Oh MrsD if only . There must be a massive gap in the market.
I did see a ladybird book a few months ago called mid life crisis which I giggled at.

over, it sounds like you are feeling a little bit better? sorry to hear you have done your back... you need anti inflammatory /pain killers. (like nurofen) could you get a rdv at an osteo ?
KOKO....
(I got my Xmas cards done, now need to get to the PO, but am dog sitting a puppy.......it's NUTS here !)

Slept really badly. Pain woke me for a while. Ds wet the bed and then this morning Dd managed to pee all over the bathroom because she didn't get there in time.
At least all the urine soaked washing got done at once.
I'm back in bed for a nap (missing a school thing ) to try and catch up. Just an hour though.

I'm KOKO.

What's rdv, mix?

Hi Onit, I'm another one who's read through the whole thread and am also cheering you on. You are coping with everything so well -- even your rants have humour, empathy and intelligence in them rather than just swearing, anger and pain (which would be fully justified!). So I just wanted to add another message of support for how well you're handling what's been thrown at you, even though I don't have anything constructive to offer as advice.

You sound a lovely lady and your DCs are lucky to have you. Keep on keeping on and we're all here for you!

I thought of you, just been in Morrisons and the sell a Mr Man book. Mr Mid Life Crisis :)