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Original poster

what should I tell my dd? i need to leave home (and dh)for a few days to think

279 replies

whattdoido · 29/02/2016 19:09

I need to leave home for a few days with my 6year old school going dd. I need to tell dd something that would be plausible both to her and to all her friends/teachers.

If dd didnt have school then I would be going to spend time with family. Im trying to cause miminum disruption and upset to dd. So/but I will most liikely be going to stay in a hotel for a few days.

OP posts:
Micah · 29/02/2016 19:12

Work trip/job interview/see an old friend?

Few days at a spa
City break

"Just going away for a few days break" is perfectly reasonable too. I think most parents understand that one!

Original poster
whattdoido · 29/02/2016 19:16

I cant camp on soneones floor as I have ill health. Otherwise that would make life easier as I would tell dd that we were doing some fun visiting.

I really do need to leave though as dh has started drinking (alcoholic) and he needs to know this is completely unacceptable

OP posts:
Original poster
whattdoido · 29/02/2016 19:17

I want dd to continue attending school. Im not ready for big decisions right now

OP posts:
DoreenLethal · 29/02/2016 19:18

How about to the school 'my husband is an alcoholic and I need to get myself and my daughter away' To your daughter 'we are going for a surprise holiday yay'.

Kirriemuir · 29/02/2016 19:18

Work being done at the house?

XanderHarris · 29/02/2016 19:19

So she's going with you?

NameAgeLocation · 29/02/2016 19:21

I like Doreen's idea.

You do not have to be ashamed of your DH being an alcoholic.

PenelopePitstops · 29/02/2016 19:21

You've booked a surprise stay in a hotel for a few days.

Stay near school, and just be honest to the teachers. They will find it easier to support dd if they know the truth.

SanityClause · 29/02/2016 19:23

If you aren't going to stay with family or friends, you could stay in a local B&B, perhaps, and she could still go to school.

Perhaps then, you could pretend to be a "secret hotel inspector".

Original poster
whattdoido · 29/02/2016 19:24

Yes most definitely taking dd with me. Im leaving so she doesnt have to see this shit. I dont want to say anything to school. I don't want social services banging at my door.

OP posts:
Original poster
whattdoido · 29/02/2016 19:26

Yes I do plan to stay close to school. B&B is a fantastic idea. Thanks x

OP posts:
moreshitandnofuckingredemption · 29/02/2016 19:30

Some sort of work at home - damp-proofing or draught-proofing, something where you wouldn't expect to see a difference when you went back.

moreshitandnofuckingredemption · 29/02/2016 19:32

Although I also like the hotel inspector idea, your DD may tell her friends, who tell their parents. Building work is more plausible.

DoreenLethal · 29/02/2016 19:32

Social services would not bang on your door for getting away from your alcoholic husband. That's the problem with our society - hiding this sort of behaviour under the carpet does nobody any good.

Mrscog · 29/02/2016 19:34

Definitely building work/asbestos checks or something. Very plausible.

Blu · 29/02/2016 19:34

Go to a local B&B, hotel, air BnB or Travelodge.
Tell your dd it is fun sometimes to have a little holiday, like sometimes you have a bed-picnic, or a lounge picnic, sometimes you have a home holiday.

OR

You won a ticket to stay in a hotel and think it would make a change

OR

The carpet / wardrobe/ kitchen cleaner is making you sneeze so you will be staying somewhere else for a while until it wears off.

7to25 · 29/02/2016 19:35

Having asbestos removed.

ICantFindAFreeNickName2 · 29/02/2016 19:38

How about a mice infestation

Original poster
whattdoido · 29/02/2016 19:41

You lot are fantastic Flowers

Where can I say my asbestos is please?

OP posts:
Millymollymoo8 · 29/02/2016 19:43

In the ceiling!

CountessOfStrathearn · 29/02/2016 19:43

I'd really encourage you to be honest with school. They will be able to support DD much better if they know what is happening and SS, in the unlikely event they got involved, would see your taking steps to protect DD in a very, very positive light.

As for DD, I can understand why you'd want to say something different. Asbestos is often found in the ceiling or in the loft of older house.

Hope things get better for you!

Lynnm63 · 29/02/2016 19:44

If you're in a fairly new build then you won't have asbestos but I guess you know that. If it's an old house it could be in the walls for insulation.

ImperialBlether · 29/02/2016 19:51

I don't blame you for doing this, but what are you hoping to achieve from it?

Original poster
whattdoido · 29/02/2016 19:53

I'm hoping that my husband will see that I'm serious and just what he will lose if he continues with this behaviour. He is a recovering alcoholic by the way. He has been dry for months until this lapse so he does know how to live dry.

Obviously he will accuse me of trying to control/blackmail him by leaving

OP posts:
xxreeldancerxx · 29/02/2016 19:55

I would be honest with school just in case your husband makes contact with them to see if your daughter is attending .....

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