He's not treating you like a real person, is he? You don't behave like that with people you recognise as living, breathing human beings, just like you, do you?
I've heard a philosophy Professor explain that notions of full (political) subjectivity should be partially suspended within marriage, so you could argue that, I guess.
However, I think it's utterly, utterly creepy. And so, I think, do you.
The question, now, I think, is for you to understand why and how your boundaries have been so eroded that you need outside support in order to acknowledge your own feelings of unease.
I suspect that the job of recognising and valuing your own feelings and boundaries may need time and support - against a background of your relationship continuing to undermine them.
I know it's a bit of a joke on mn that we say: 'Get counselling!' But you need it. You really do. It's the fact that you seem so distanced from your own immediate responses that concerns me. That kind of response doesn't happen overnight. It suggests that there is history here, that you may not have noticed. And it takes time to undo.
In the meantime, well, he needs to stop. But your problem is that you don't seem to have the means to make him. Consent, clearly, has no traction with him here.
Good luck.