DRY 10!!!!

[CheesyNachos]

Welcome! This is the thread for those of us who want to abstain from alcohol. We are all at different stages of our journey, and many of us have some hiccups along the way, but we are committed to an exciting, fulfilling, joyful life alcohol-free.

Previous thread is here.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2485290-DRY-9?pg=1

Everyone is welcome!

Hello I have read these threads for some time. I have known a long time I am a problem drinker and I need to stop. I am not great at posting on mumsnet as I am a bit sensitive but I would like to join this thread for support.

I have had a horrible christmas due to too much drinking- every other night drunk and every other day hungover. I am moody, emotional, fat due to comfort eating and my head is a mess. I really need to stop this. However drinking is the only way I know how to relax . I know how crazy this is cos it messes my head and causes so much stress. I am hungover and sick today and desperate to get out of this cycle.

Good morning! Gladistopped, your posts sound SO positive! I've just been reading how having a structure for the times when you would have been drinking, is v important, and I need to do the same myself. Inspired by you, I'm going to look into yoga classes today. Hope AA goes well, I'm evangelical about it, and there's a theory certainly in the US that initially 90 meetings in 90 days is the way to go! I'm doing weekly and may do some daytime ones when the children go back to school this week.

Booradly77 I know exactly what you mea about the cycle, not relaxing etc. It's horrible and I was stuck there for a very very long time.

Hi Boo and Marry. The people here give fm far better advice than I do so I'll just say hi and hold your hand along the way.

Hey Cheesy how's things today?

Hi boo yes the relaxing bit is a tough one. I've associated the wine = relaxing for the best part of 12 years.
I turned to the wine when I had children becoming a daily drinker with the amount increasing as they got older.
This time last year I was probably drinking 1-1.5 per day (bottles) though when I met my OH I did drop it slightly.
The first few days I found terribly hard. But not impossible. I did it yayyy!
I found that the lack of demarcation between day and evening terribly difficult.
As marry mentioned I had to have a strict plan to pass the time in the evening. A complete change in routine. For example tonight I will collect children from school.
4pm is my hour of MN or a nap.
5pm - 6 cook and clean.
7- 8 is a dance class home by 830 shower and 9pm bed (but will read/mn until I feel sleepy)
I'm around 9 weeks in though I did drink on a few occasions over Christmas those occasions were with family not on my own wining it up by myself which I am terrified of going back to.
I never thought I would be terrified of the curse of wine o'clock. Its amazing.
It didn't take long at all to feel happy about not drinking in the evenings. No hangovers is such a joy.
I feel happier than I ever could have imagined. Its there for the taking for you too.
Socially I have a bit of work to do. However OH has a long standing hobby which I am starting to really enjoy which is very social and not particularly boozy so I will look forward to embracing that.
Good luck and when you take the plunge post as often as you like. Even if the board looks quiet I'm usually checking threads I'm on and I am sure every one else is too.

Hi,

I'm just popping in to tell you about an essay that I have just read. It was mentioned in the comments section of the Guardian.

Jonsleeper.wordpress.com

The writer was in the band 'Sleeper', not that that's particularly relevant.

There was also a long piece in the Guardian about him.

Apologies if this has already been mentioned but I found it very open and balanced.

Can't link on phone.

Cheesy that's brilliant, I MUST get around to doing that re. knitting. Was it hard?

Boo welcome to the thread. The good news is that just about every negative thing you wrote about how you're feeling will improve vastly once you cut out the booze. I know it feels as though we need the booze to relax but honestly it doesn't take long to retrain that thought pattern. Children and those who've never drunk do not need alcohol to relax; we have overridden the natural ability to listen to our bodies and relax in ways that we don't have to have 'payback' for later. It is such a good feeling to be freed from the prison which is needing the booze to help us feel 'normal'... when it is the alcohol which has us operating at sub-par in the first place.

I always found on addiction very poignant.

Cross-posted there. Frisk thank you so much for posting that link, I'm just ploughing through it. A lot to take in but as you say it seems very well-balanced and undogmatic.

dona you sound so positive and focused. :)

Hi everyone. So lovely to see new faces on the thread. :)

Teapot I am loving knitting. I am only doing the most simple of simple stitches, but it is a start! I also ordered off amazon this book which helped immensely with learning how to cast on. (I have not yet had to cast off!). She also has a brilliant hint that if you drop stitches or have some holes then you can sew a nice button or sequiny thing over it and it makes a quite unique piece of work!

www.amazon.co.uk/Knitty-Gritty-Knitting-Absolute-Beginner/dp/0713685425

I am making DS a lovely seagreen and turquoise scarf.

Hadron thanks for asking. Things are pretty draining. MIL in hospital. FIL very confused and with double incontinence. We are trying to sort out temporary nursing care for him today as even the two of us (DH and I) have problems lifting and moving him. Not sure what the future holds, but certainly the ILs are pretty frail and unwell. It helps that DS is back at school- some breathing space. I did drink yesterday, and regret it hugely. It makes me feel all scattered emotionally. I want to go to AA I really do. But I am afraid.... of being outed. Silly I know.

dona I like your evening plan... sounds good. I went to the gym this morning. :) That made me feel better too.

Off to read that link now *Frisk( thanks for posting.

Cheesy thanks for that link. I'm going to have a serious think about starting it - I know I'd enjoy it if I can get the hang of it.

You sound like you have so much on your plate; wishing you strength to get through it. Don't forget that everyone at a meeting has as much risk of being outed as you do - you're all there for the same reason.

Cheesy I work with in the area of older people's care (don't want to say too much on here but senior management) Pm me if you want advice on short term solutions or long term care. Help us out there but it's a mine field.
The impact on the carers is not to be underestimated. I've seen it tear families apart as some are the natural carers (me) and others have their heads in the sand (my sister).

Cheesy that sounds so very hard on you. Virtual strength coming your way!
Re AA can you go to one in the next town? You don't have to give your real name either. Someone laughingly said to me "most people are called John!"

Hello. This is me de-lurking. I stopped drinking as of 1st Jan. I've done dry January before (approximately!) but this time I'm intending to carry on. I was drinking at least a bottle of wine a day. I'm fed up with feeling crap, fat, poor, grumpy, lethargic and guilty. It's going fine so far, but of course the hard bit is yet to come - when I'm out with friends or we have people over who are drinking. I'm planning on keeping a low profile for now though I have a party in a few weeks which will be the test I think.

Hello MrsHudsontookmyskull! You're in good company here! X

Baths! What a great idea, I do love a bath. Knitting and crochet - I haven't done those for decades but can see they will keep hands and brain busy.

Thank you for all the suggestions. I suppose I could also give cleaning a go

CLEANING! Steady on!

Back from the seaside & wanted to wave to the new people and say congrats to glad 300 out of 365 days is bloody brilliant :)

Cheesy hope you get care/support sorted soon and please take care of yourselves too if lifting and moving

Hi x This looks like a great place to be right now... can i play!?

Oh my ive had such a crappy year (2015 ... not this year... yet!!). My drinkings changed from happy giggly weekend drinks out with friends to solitary binge drinking to momentarily escape my reality. Booze truley is a drug.

Anyway "D"H monumentally bollocked me the other day, told me i had to stop with the wine. I know he's right. Ive just been so bloomin SAD ive been drinking to forget. I lost myself somewhere along the way last year.... argh welling up again dammit... poor bloody me lol!

It will be strange not having a wine prop but im also v excited about getting myself back on track. Here goes.... ☺

Lovely to meet you all here x

3rd day today no booze ... I know it's 6:28am but I'm positive Pete!

Water in .....

Head down at work ....

Keep busy with toddler so it doesn't send me over the edge - that's my trigger point!!

Good luck comrades!

Well done Pete it is such a wonderful feeling!
jelly welcome I'm sorry you have had such a crap year. Stopping drinking IS exciting it truly is. Ok so it won't make all of your problems go away but I would certainly say a lot of them do.
Is today the 'day'? It gets so much easier and better.
I was a daily wine drinker - and not just a glass. More on social occasions.
I'll post again later but i have to do the school battle...

Joining :)

Your thread encouraged me to have my first booze free night in months.

Normally, it would be a bottle of wine at night. It would be a bad nights sleep and guilt, shame and anxiety the next morning. It would be worrying about my husband worrying about me.

Today I will not drink.

Orange - I am you.

Let's break the cycle