Do I tell DP I'm bisexual

[hedleylamarre]

I've known that I swung both ways since I was 16, and it's never been a big deal for me, although I've usually been quite discreet about it, and I've only had a few same-sex couplings. My last relationship ended, however, when I told my then-DP that I felt was attracted to men as well as women- this seemed to freak her out, and she ended things not long after, saying she wasn't comfortable going out with a bisexual- I think she may have misinterpreted that I was asking for permission to 'play around'- which I wasn't and wouldn't do in a monogamous relationship anyway.

Fast-forward 2 years and I'm now in a relationship with a woman who I care for deeply and with whom I can see things developing. She has some trust issues though (her previous 2 boyfriends both cheated on her, and the last gaslighted her to cover it up), and she wants us both to be completely honest with one another about everything. And I really want to be open with her and tell her about the way I am, not because I want to play around, but just so she knows who I am, but I'm worried that it'll put her off as well, because she might also be worried that it's part of me she can't satisfy (when it doesn't matter)

You aren't bi you are just confused what an apt user name you have.

just finding both men and women attractive - to be fair I find men and women attractive but I'm not sexually attracted to women so I'd insert a "sexually* in front of "attractive"

I grew up in South Africa when AIDS first started to emerge, and although back then those who came out to talk about it were predominantly gay/bisexual and many of the stereotypes emerged from those days, the message was always that you could catch it from having unprotected sex with someone who had come into contact with it. And in africa blood transfusion was as much of a factor as sexual transmission.

I was though when we came home and a relative who had recently split from her h talked about how she had never had protected sex and when my mum said to her that she surely should be concerned about e.g. HIV she said "well no, because only gays get that." and that certainly seemed to be the predominant view over here and that was in the early 90's.

I'm assuming the "just confused" comment is a joke If it's not, then we're doing very well on the biphobia bingo - confused, promiscuous, and HIV thrown into the mix too!

Vashta!

I'm assuming the "just confused" comment is a joke oh wouldn't that be a nice assumption... mind you having searched for crazy's previous posts and judging by the deletions... I'm kinda veering more towards the "not"!