Unwanted advance made by a dad on the school run

[urbanIsland]

I talk to my son's(5 years old) best friend's parents often on the walk to school. Today the father asked if I would like to meet them for coffee after dropping them off. i said yes but when I got to Costa with my baby in the pram there was only him there. I asked where his wife was he said that she was not coming and he had a present for me but I could not tell his wife about it. I was now in catatonic shock as he handed the present to me. I managed to say I am going and just left. I didn't throw the present at him, I realised to my horror when I got home that I had it in my hand.

I do not know what to do now, I wanted my son and theirs to go to each others houses and play together etc and enjoyed talking to both parents on the school walk. The mother will surely think that I did something to prompt this advance if I tell her and I need to clearly get it through to him that he is completely wrong and never to do anything like that again.

Any ideas how best to fix this without losing my son's best friend?

Wrapping soft presents can be tricky so there's always a chance the wife knows about it because he might have got her to put her finger on it whilst he applied the sticky tape.

When did Relationship turn into AIBU?

But he won't be shitting himself if it is something perfectly innocuous Bogey.

If it was perfectly innocuous then his wife would mind and it would be ok for to know wouldnt it?

Oh come ooooon, pps! What married man with kids buys a woman who he finds beautiful a baby blanket and goes to the trouble of wrapping it up? Seriously? Of course he's trying his luck. He invited her to coffee with 'them' and then when she gets there the wife suddenly isn't able to make it. Riiiight

Exactly.

The use of 'catatonic' wasn't the best word to use but I think it gives the gist of the shock and surprise she felt and she walked out because she wasn't able to deal with it by pulling him up on it. Getting pedantic on the semantics of a word ignores the fact that she felt uncomfortable, taking the piss out of somebody worried enough to post on here for support really isn't very nice or helpful at all.

AIfuckingBU seeps into everything. It was the beginning of the end. It's just sanctioned bitching.

Can people stop doing the whole 'if the OP was genuine' shite, please? Can we just presume that she is?

I've been away a while and come back and it's still full of the same old troll hunting as it was years ago.

Enough.

Is the queen thing code for 'I suspect this to be a troll'? Tell me it isn't

Wrapping soft presents can be tricky so there's always a chance the wife knows about it because he might have got her to put her finger on it whilst he applied the sticky tape.

Hahahahahahahahahaha!

Do we still not know what the present is?

come onnnnnnnnn!

It doesn't matter what it is, does it? It's not about that. The context of the gift tells her everything she needs to know.

Opening it would give the impression that she cared what was in it despite the context.

The only sensible thing is to dispose of it or to give it back unopened. This isn't some kind of game show.

No, Patter, far from it. It is to do with 'rude' or threads when posters 'overshare'. It is a kind of 'clutches pearls' thing from what I understand.

Thanks for explaining. I didn't get the feeling this thread was rude or oversharing but that's perhaps personal interpretation.

cant you do what most people would do. Ignore him from now on, be short with him if you absolutely have to speak, and just pretend it didnt happen.

but also open the present

Who said we don't believe her?

Maybe the people who think she is writing a book!

Geeeeez patter

Actually I think what the present is does play a significant role in this thread. But obviously your right patter

How would opening it give the impression she cared? He won't actually know either way. And she took it, let's not forget. He could possibly have gotten the notion that she cared from that; even though she claims it was through shock.

It doesn't matter what it is, does it? It's not about that. The context of the gift tells her everything she needs to know.

I really don't agree with this for the reasons posted above. It is actually possible for normal sensible people to misread a situation and get the wrong end of the stick. It happens all the time. Intuition is wrong sometimes; humans do misread each other.

The point about "it could be a t-shirt with his wife's face on to be worn at her surprise birthday party" was slightly facetious but it's possible that "don't tell my wife" may mean something totally innocent. (eg. I'm getting rid of a jumper she bought me because I hate it).

If the gift is lingerie or anything intimate, then there is no question of any misreading. That illustrates that the content of the gift does make a difference.

If it's something else, then it may put a completely different complexion on the whole encounter. It may cause (legitimately) the OP to question her reading of the situation or on the other hand it could confirm it.

I would have to open the present to see what it was.

Hopefully it has multiple layers of wrapping paper with a Fun Size sweet hidden between each layer and then the final gift will be like a hairbrush or something.

I'm confused?! Am I missing something?

Random gives wrapped present, tells OP she's beaut, says don't tell my wife, OP shits it, OP hightails it whilst unknowingly carrying said gift in her hand whilst pushing buggy, hasn't unwrapped gift and OP's H wants to batter Random, OP posts about it on MN, drip feeds & abandons thread.

Is this right?

Weirdest and most unsatisfactory thread...ever.

"Weirdest and most unsatisfactory thread...ever."

Not much of a thriller either.

A more macabre and chilling plotline (if it is for book) might be that the son's best friend's parents are actually bird lovers and the OP's cat keeps killing the birds in their garden to bring them home to OP's doorstep as gifts.

So one day the man decides to set up a meet with the OP in a local coffee shop and hands her a 'present'; telling her she is beautiful.

"'It feels just like a jumper' she thought, wondering what on earth she had done to prompt this seemingly improper advance from the man. She was now in a catatonic state of shock. After making her excuses she fled wildly from the coffee house, her mind racing with thoughts about telling the wife and why she hadn't just thrown the present back at him. Upon arriving home, she realises to her horror that the present is still in her hands. Sweating profusely and with gritted teeth, she slowly picks open the brightly coloured paper concealing the present which had been given to her. It was only then that the true horror was fully revealed as she upwrapped the lifeless body of her bird murdering cat."

MadMan that is a much more satisfying narrative. Poor bird though

Maybe the Random Man has Op as high end drug smuggler and the wrapped present actually is a softish drug? op you might be being an inadvertent mule! Open it!

I think it was an invisibility cloak .... And she has opened it and is lurking here unseen

I agree with purplesky that is definitely the only reason for OP not returning! Great thinking

Does it feel like a jar of Nutella?? UrbanIsland

Just open the present already!!

Why, have you got something to fess up to, flatbellyfella?

MadeMan you have gone too far with the fictitious dead cat! Please write some more. What happens next?