what do you do with a husband who ..........

[bella1968]

Marks a cross on the days on the calendar that we don't have sex! He d to do it in a diary a year ago and I felt really pressured now this calendar is on the kitchen wall for everyone to see.Admittedly no-one knows what the crosses mean but does anyone else's husband do this??

Er, no.

What a twat

I'd fill the next month with crosses just so he knows he's being a dick.

No they don't. At least no one that i know has admitted to it, and I have some pretty frank chats with my mates.

Pull the calendar down and throw it in the bin, tell him that if he carries on there will be a cross on every single day.

you do not OWE him sex.

I'd stop having sex with him.

Actually, just do what Gold says - much better idea

Gold- brilliant.

you felt really pressured........to have sex I assume ?

Why are you with this juvenile, self centred, entitled cretin ?

I was about to suggest the same.
Cross off tomorrow for a start.

Wtaf is he thinking?

I agree with Justice. Get a pen and cross off every day for the rest of this month.

Go back to the days he's crossed off and write underneath those days things like:

No foreplay provided by you
Weight of your expectation made me feel defensive
You didn't ask in a nice way
I was tired
My vagina was still sore from the meaningless pounding I got last time
I'm to angry with you to relax
We don't communicate
You do not get sex as of right
My body is not a vessel to be used by you

Gold's idea is great. He has no right to make an issue of you not having sex on any particular day! And the calendar thing is completely strange and intended to make you feel bad. Not good.

Oh em gee.

Unbelievable.

What is he like otherwise? How did you find out this is what it was?

I'm trying not to jump straight in with ltb.

Ugh...what a tasteless dickhead.

I agree with Gold, and just put a big D on the day too, just so he knows he a dick.

What. The. Fuck.

To be perfectly honest, I would question whether I was happy with a person who respected me so little as a person and sought to publicly shame me into doing his bidding.

Life is too short for shit like that. I am incandescent on your behalf. What an utter twat! I hope he has some truly stellar redeeming qualities.

And what Gold said too. Cross off the whole damn year while you're at it.

not only would i cross out the whole of next month - i would cross the entire rest of the year with a note saying until he stops pressuring you the crosses mean exactly what he made them mean!
tell him to stop being such a prick.

My first thought was: can you get a 5 year calendar and cross off everyday.

But my second (and probably better) thought is: why don't you want to have sex with your DH?

Because he's a massive Arsehole?

That is well beyond bonkers. I can't think why someone would do something like that but surely any explanation would have to contain words like "selfish", "entitled" and "twat". And the solution would need to refer to sex and (one-way) travel. What an arsehole.

Consider why I still live with him!

Instead of crosses for next month you could tick everyday! Far more positive approach

Was about to suggest the same as Goldmandra.

He would never have sex with me ever again if he was my partner!

What a twat.

'Why don't you want to have sex with your DH'?

Because he marks the calendar with a big cross if you don't?
That in itself would put me right off as it would feel like he was pressuring me/emotionally blackmailing me.
Why does he feel the need to do this?

Bloody hell, really?

Wow he sounds terrible.
I agree that the next month should be a dull month of crosses.
I would also be tempted to go back to the days that aren't crossed out & grade his efforts from 1-10.

Not dull! Full! Stupid bloody phone.

Buy my own calendar and put a gold star on every day I didn't have sex with the idiot.