He was fucking lying...

[ScarletLady02]

Some users on here are going to say "I told you so" but I said I'd hold my hands up if I found out he was lying to me.

He cheated on me with my best friend. He looked me square in my face and told me afterwards it made him feel sick and he would cut all contact with her.

He's been telling her he loves her and he left me for her.

I am literally shaking with rage as I type this.

Oh SF/AF is sweet and fluffy really, but don't tell anyone

What's you instincts telling you about this guy. My feeling is that you're uneasy, so hold back, and take your own time.

If he's genuine, he'll respect your space, and if it's meant to be it'll happen, but only when you're ready. It has to be on your terms.

You need time to chill, relax, get to know yourself, learn from everything that's happened.

If he's a decent man, he'll wait, and he won't expect a thing!

Scarlet, stay away from the bloke sniffing around you. Is he wanting to come around because he knows Fuckwit is out of the pciture ?

You don't need any more complications right now.

God yes, you're as vulnerable as fuck right now and he knows it. Steer well clear. It's like a bloody klaxon goes off in some people's homes when a man or woman becomes unexpectedly single. I've personally witnessed that sort of vulture behaviour twice in the past few months...and it's not a pretty sight.

You need to get yourself on a even keel right now, without a man in tow.

Spend a good amount of time on your own (with dc), love

It will be an investment in your future.

Letting creepy guys who smell your vulnerability from 100 miles away into your inner circle would be a huge mistake.

I know...I'm not planning on doing anything with him. He is a good friend and it could just be genuine concern...He's not creepy at all. I just don't know if I can let him be that friend right now...but I don't have many.

Ask yourself why he is putting pressure on right now.

I would stick with that fab female friendship you just rekindled.

If you are already "confused" where he is concerned, then it's a no-no. Full stop.

You're right...he'll back off if I tell him to and won't take it badly. I don't want to lose him as a friend, he has been a good one over the years. I just can't shake this feeling of "agenda"

Take it slowly and tell him you aren't ready to be visited yet but thank him and say you'll let him know when you arexx

You know he's got an agenda. You know this isn't just friendship to him. To be fair, if he's a decent bloke you could end up leading him up the garden path yourself, building his hopes up and hurting him. Because you're just too raw to get involved anywhere else at the moment and if you asked him to come round, you're so vulnerable to a bit of human kindness and being made to feel desirable again that chances are, something would happen. That wouldn't be fair on either of you right now and it could ruin a good friendship.

Stick with the old mate. Did you apologise to her by the way?

I did...I apologised a lot. She gave me a hug and told me not to be silly. She's a good 'un.

she sounds great. I am going to bed now. Hope you get a good night sleep Scarlet and look forward to her lovely lunchx

Thanks love x

Hello Scarlet, hope you had a lovely dayx

What a fucking shit day....just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, my Nan's been taken into hospital. She's 93, so it's unlikely to be good news. My Mum is getting worse by the day (she has terminal cancer that's spread to her brain). She's having fits now.

I can't take much more of this. I've heard through the grapevine that OW is loudly declaring "D"H her "new boyfriend" on Facebook. Her wall is public, we have mutual friends (as does DH) my family could see it. I was going to tell them what had happened today, but my Mum is sick with worry about Nan, as well as being terribly sick herself...I just couldn't bring myself to do it. Kept a brave face on round there and now I'm in tears again...

I really can't cope with this.

Ok..one step at a time. Life has a way of kicking you in the shins when you just don't need it.

Take a deep breath. Prioritise. The following might sound harsh but it's purely designed to get you through the next 2/3 days. Your mum is ill and now has your nan's illness to deal with. We don't know what's wrong with your nan yet and there is no point speculating until you do. So right now, support your mum. If there comes an opportune moment to tell her about you, do so. In a weird way, supporting you & being angry at your h might you something to unite over.

Ignore OW and her dramas. She clearly thinks she's living in a soap opera. Of course it will hurt if they are together but you have bigger fish to fry at the moment. Take care of the people that really matter - you, your mum, your nan. There is no shame in crying and it is a coping mechanism. Please make sure you eat today - you need your energy.

That sucks

so sorry about your Mum and your Nan.

It might be an idea to block OW and your DH on facebook so you don't have to see all that crap.

Delete and block them on FB, they're not decent enough people to know.

OP have you outed yourself by revealing DD's name !!

I've asked for it to be deleted, I genuinely didn't realise I'd done it.

I've blocked on Facebook, I really thought I HAD already blocked her but up it popped on my newsfeed. According to him he's now blocked her too as it's lies. Not my business. Going out tonight to see a friend. NEED WINE!

Oh lord - I thought you just called her that because of your name! Sorry.
have a nice evening, you deserve it

Your ex is still saying it's lies when OW has posted it all over FB ? I presume he has called the police and got an injunction against this woman for online stalking and harassment then ? Thought not.

Does he think you are completely stupid ?

I am sorry about your mum/mum's mum.