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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

He was fucking lying...

205 replies

ScarletLady02 · 16/10/2013 15:46

Some users on here are going to say "I told you so" but I said I'd hold my hands up if I found out he was lying to me.

He cheated on me with my best friend. He looked me square in my face and told me afterwards it made him feel sick and he would cut all contact with her.

He's been telling her he loves her and he left me for her.

I am literally shaking with rage as I type this.

OP posts:

Report

ScarletLady02 · 19/10/2013 20:22

I've reported it twice now. First time was after a kind member PMed me to let me know I'd done it. A few times I've gone to write her name and kept going "shit no..DD!!" but always checked it, I just missed it this time.

OP posts:

itsmeisntit · 19/10/2013 20:19

Did it a while back Scarlet but MNHQ a bit slow tonight

ScarletLady02 · 19/10/2013 19:14

Thanks for the support everyone.

I might have to report that post again as I'm uncomfortable with the name there. Could other people maybe report too? It might get it taken down quicker. Thanks.

OP posts:

SmiteYouWithThunderbolts · 19/10/2013 19:06

Oh bloody buggering hell Scarlet! So you've either got a lying shitbag of an H, or a lying shitbag of a 'friend'. Or both.

Blocking them both on fb sounds like a good start. I have no pearls of wisdom for you. Just lots of rage.

cjel · 19/10/2013 18:55

So sorry to hear about all the illness around you Scarlet, but I'd also try and think about DM and the rest will take care of itself.(((hugs)))

KingRollo · 19/10/2013 18:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ScaryFucker · 19/10/2013 18:41

Your ex is still saying it's lies when OW has posted it all over FB ? I presume he has called the police and got an injunction against this woman for online stalking and harassment then ? Thought not.

Does he think you are completely stupid ?

I am sorry about your mum/mum's mum.

KingRollo · 19/10/2013 18:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lazarusb · 19/10/2013 17:59

Oh lord - I thought you just called her that because of your name! Sorry.
have a nice evening, you deserve it

ScarletLady02 · 19/10/2013 16:51

I've asked for it to be deleted, I genuinely didn't realise I'd done it.

I've blocked on Facebook, I really thought I HAD already blocked her but up it popped on my newsfeed. According to him he's now blocked her too as it's lies. Not my business. Going out tonight to see a friend. NEED WINE!

OP posts:

itsmeisntit · 19/10/2013 16:45

OP have you outed yourself by revealing DD's name !!

BooHissy · 19/10/2013 16:41

Delete and block them on FB, they're not decent enough people to know.

AmberLeaf · 19/10/2013 15:38

That sucks

so sorry about your Mum and your Nan.

It might be an idea to block OW and your DH on facebook so you don't have to see all that crap.

lazarusb · 19/10/2013 15:36

Ok..one step at a time. Life has a way of kicking you in the shins when you just don't need it.

Take a deep breath. Prioritise. The following might sound harsh but it's purely designed to get you through the next 2/3 days. Your mum is ill and now has your nan's illness to deal with. We don't know what's wrong with your nan yet and there is no point speculating until you do. So right now, support your mum. If there comes an opportune moment to tell her about you, do so. In a weird way, supporting you & being angry at your h might you something to unite over.

Ignore OW and her dramas. She clearly thinks she's living in a soap opera. Of course it will hurt if they are together but you have bigger fish to fry at the moment. Take care of the people that really matter - you, your mum, your nan. There is no shame in crying and it is a coping mechanism. Please make sure you eat today - you need your energy.

ScarletLady02 · 19/10/2013 14:03

What a fucking shit day....just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, my Nan's been taken into hospital. She's 93, so it's unlikely to be good news. My Mum is getting worse by the day (she has terminal cancer that's spread to her brain). She's having fits now.

I can't take much more of this. I've heard through the grapevine that OW is loudly declaring "D"H her "new boyfriend" on Facebook. Her wall is public, we have mutual friends (as does DH) my family could see it. I was going to tell them what had happened today, but my Mum is sick with worry about Nan, as well as being terribly sick herself...I just couldn't bring myself to do it. Kept a brave face on round there and now I'm in tears again...

I really can't cope with this.

OP posts:

ScarletLady02 · 18/10/2013 20:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cjel · 18/10/2013 19:50

Hello Scarlet, hope you had a lovely dayx

ScarletLady02 · 17/10/2013 23:25

Thanks love x

OP posts:

cjel · 17/10/2013 23:09

she sounds great. I am going to bed now. Hope you get a good night sleep Scarlet and look forward to her lovely lunchx

ScarletLady02 · 17/10/2013 23:06

I did...I apologised a lot. She gave me a hug and told me not to be silly. She's a good 'un.

OP posts:

Leavenheath · 17/10/2013 22:31

You know he's got an agenda. You know this isn't just friendship to him. To be fair, if he's a decent bloke you could end up leading him up the garden path yourself, building his hopes up and hurting him. Because you're just too raw to get involved anywhere else at the moment and if you asked him to come round, you're so vulnerable to a bit of human kindness and being made to feel desirable again that chances are, something would happen. That wouldn't be fair on either of you right now and it could ruin a good friendship.

Stick with the old mate. Did you apologise to her by the way?

cjel · 17/10/2013 22:29

Take it slowly and tell him you aren't ready to be visited yet but thank him and say you'll let him know when you arexx

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ScarletLady02 · 17/10/2013 22:24

You're right...he'll back off if I tell him to and won't take it badly. I don't want to lose him as a friend, he has been a good one over the years. I just can't shake this feeling of "agenda"

OP posts:

ScaryFucker · 17/10/2013 22:20

If you are already "confused" where he is concerned, then it's a no-no. Full stop.

ScaryFucker · 17/10/2013 22:19

Ask yourself why he is putting pressure on right now.

I would stick with that fab female friendship you just rekindled.

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