Wet sex.....

[Ohbother5]

I've enquired with dr google but don't seem to come up with much (unlike in the bedroom!).

The problem we have is I get.... Over lubricated shall we say. I don't know what I can do to stop it, or at least tone it down.

DP has his own issues on and off too, obviously when I'm too wet, he isn't getting the feeling and sometimes loses his erection or has to bang away hammer and tongs.

We have a good sex life in general, but this issue means certain positions always fail.

Help!

Actually, reading that again, from what I can gather she manages to avoid actually having to shag him.

Go her.

a judgement needs to be made if embarking on this course of action.

It's like trying to jump onto a ferry that is just leaving the docks...

A digital alarm clock at that, picnic.

It all sounds like very hard work.

Tears and judgement calls. And squirting.

Bloody hell, we just have a shag in this house.

What the heck?

I am crying here,crying

Are they tears of joy and contentment, FrigginRex?

And here I was thinking digital penetration was referring to a good old-fashioned joystick, taking technology to hand, so to speak.

is your real name Brian by any chance?

Crying and snorting with laughter here.

Should've gone for "flicking the bean" like in the good old days. I think that was followed by going at it "like a jackhammer", but my old memory could be failing me here.

I find myself in urgent need of TenaLady.

Think Mrs AlwaysOptimistic* probably does too

*Am I the only one singing 'Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life' to myself?

"time for church"

That has to be Brian from Hull, non?

headless arf at Brian of 'Ull

What were the reasons she needed encouragement to embark on sexual liaisons again?

And 'ample vagina'!!

Maybe some more "clench" was needed pmsl - what an apt name on this thread, SirRaymond!

Tawdry joy at having livened up a boring Sunday and contentment that I will probably never read something so cringeworthy ever again.

Ample vagina [grins]

Evidently she'd gone into retirement but he made her ample vagina a digital offer she couldn't refuse.

And that's not a sentence I expected to write this morning.

Ah McNameChangey it was the memorable sexual technics thread!

Really ought to be in Classics

On a Sunday morning as well

Maybe he puts that on their Christmas cards:

Happy Christmas!
from Optimistic, Partner and her Ample Vagina!
xxx

Oh I've just read the first post in the sexual technics (sic) thread and nearly cried...dare I read the rest?

"took me a whileto work out what 'digital penetration' was."

Me too ... for a moment I thought Apple had started making dildos.

Oh Boreof, that's the one. It harks back to a more innocent time