The Dating Thread - Part 12. How NOT to lose the will to live. Sense of humour essential!

[TimeForMeAndDD]

Good morning everyone! Had to start a new thread as the old one is no longer receiving posts.

Fill yer boots!

Morning Time my lovely how are you? :o

Hey Lubey! I'm jolly good thank you! Still happily single and still smiling! How are you doing?

Still single, very happy with that, grinning a lot - Mr Datetheotherday seems to think we DID have a spark. Hmmm. He is hot but I couldn't date him properly... maybe just a teeeny bit of fun though... ;)

Oh and I have another date next week... from RL again what's going onnnnnn man?

Following on from the last thread...

Hi Hiding! I don't think you've been "emotionally unavailable". I just think you've pretty much got your shit together and have a clear idea of what you don't want. Are you sure 16,000Km is too far away for an LDR? :)

Hi Time and Lubey!

I don't do LDR's personally i need more sex I want to see them more than once every few weeks.

I was supposed to have a date this weekend if I could get s baby sitter, but things changed Wednesday night.

lubey am loving your idea of not dating I wouldn't mind not dating like that. If I'm being honest I would much prefer to meet/date men from real life than a dating site. The two 'experiences' I have had proved how easy it is to fib when behind a computer screen.

Hiding I went through a phase of thinking I must be emotionally unavailable too, but after thinking about it further I know I'm not, I just know what I want and what I don't want and I'm not prepared to settle for something that stresses me rather than soothes me. I will quite happily spend the rest of my life single than be with someone who doesn't compliment me, and me him. That's not emotionally unavailable, that's just sensible

Hi Rob!

lubey - rl dates? what? i thought those things were fabled myths :)

notsure - so - how did it go?

Im not seeing the builder this weekend, he has his children... and then im not free for 3 weeks. so thats that.

Lubey well done on the dates!

So, an update on my text situation: I sent a reply to the Scot along the lines drafted by Watch and Time on the last thread.

He replied, literally within minutes, to say he was having a terrible week. A couple more texts were then exchanged in which I said 'there, there' and that's pretty much where it's at - I sent the last text to which haven't yet had a reply.

However, I'm not sure if that text was delivered, as I should get a delivery receipt and havent...but it didn't bounce back either, so not sure one way or the other. But don't want to resend in case he did get it! Honestly phone calls are much simpler :)

sponge, weird, isnt it.

The buddist and my date from last wed are still contacting me on pof every few days, general chit chat, bit like your texts. strange behaviour...

one of the men i deleted off my fb messaged me on there to find out why i had deleted him, i told him i just had, and he saifd he was sorry and he guessing it was probably doing that ' stringing along nonsense that men do' dickhead!

Sponge if he is having a 'terrible week' bless him then I think you can cut him a bit of slack. If you want to that is? It seems you have his interest, it's just real life getting in the way at the moment, so you have pulled . Don't let that stop you from pulling some more though, you might just come across one that's having a fantastic week!

Watch how very dare he contact you to ask why you deleted him! The cheek of the man. You deleted him Because You Can!

Morning all, I will try to keep up with this thread, but you are all so quick, one minute of absense and I get quite lost...

So German Dr being married and father of big family, we had a long talk, and I feel sorry for the guy (best sex I ever had) so we are now FWB...I know, I should feel guilty, but I don't...

Anyway, there is also Mr. Computer Wizard, who has now been renamed...droopy....won't bother getting into contact again...

Grenoble Nuts (in French it is very funny) very interesting, excellent in bed, but only gives me news when he wants to see me, well, I'm ok with that really, but a little bit more interest would be nice. But then again I could seriously fall for him if he lived nearer and gave me more news, so it's perhaps just as well.

Italian Motor biker, very sexy, very italian, touchy, cute, nice....but one thing that really spooks me is that (sorry very OTT) when he, ahem, it's with no outer signs, if you see what I mean....But he's very romantic and invites me for breakfast on my way to work sometimes...

Mr Accountant, disappeared, pity but there you go...

I'm 57 and still learning.....

I'm with Hiding from DD in the fact that I now know (more or less) what I would eventually want from a relationship and I'm not going to put up with anything less that my expectation (which are getting higher). My self esteem had grown and my critical inner eye is getting acuter by the day.

Must admit that if Mumsnet hadn't been here God knows in what (sexless) state I would be in.

I always text, its easier and I am no good on the phone anyways. And also means I can keep my minutes to ring ny bestie too.

Morning all, love the new thread title.

Lubey - top news on all the dates.

Watch - thought the buddhist had dropped of the radar completely. I never understand the ongoing random contact either. Bit like what me & Mr NI are doing. To my mind it is them hedging their bets. Personally, I'd rather they either asked me out again, or dropped the contact completely.

Sponge - I'm sure he'll be back in touch. If he's having a crap week, he is probably preoccupied. Men (other than PoppaRob of course) aren't as good as us laydies at keeping multiple issues bobbling around in their heads.

Hello Hiding - I'm also emotionally unavailable - to any kind of fuckwittery or messing about. I've realised that I would honestly and truthfully rather be on my own than be putting up with any kind of dysfunctional rubbish.

noluck your dance card is full! :)

Well, I was getting rusty and I need more exercise and after years of being ignored (and stupidly accepting that) I now lead the walse (so to say)..

re emotional unavailability, I concur with everyone else on this..

I suspect the criteria for being emotionally unavailable are someone lower for women than for men, ie it's another way of saying that a woman is in control of her feelings and doesnt act like a lovesick puppy just because she had sex with someone

I'm pleased to say that internet dating (with all it's horrors) has worked wonders for my emotional unavailability

Wow noluck - what a line up! Are you meeting all these men via the internet - or just through real life?

Morning all!
Time I thought we were going to include the 16"er in the thread title?

Sponge hope for you The Scot is being genuine, I'd give him some breathing space if he has said his week is tits up he's having a stressful week!

NoLuck at Mr Droopy. Also you are better off without the accountant, they are on my list of profs. not to date ever and I am one

So, I've hidden my pof profile yesterday Only hidden mind, not deleted! So far Mr lovely is saying all the right things, but I am not stoopid enough to believe a thing any man says these days that on my very first pof date I have met a man who might actually be worth my time & heart! It does make me wish i'd considered pof earlier before wasting money on shitty paid for sites
Its all a bit quick, and I've had myself re-read some old red flag threads, (nothing there as yet) as I've never been known to make the best choices in the game of lurve. I also spied the thread about good relationships & how you know it is a good one. It made my stomach flip, but tis early days and I don't want to get my hopes up. But for now, I am officially not dating anyone else, and I'm happy about that!

MLM I'm crap on the phone too,in rl I only enjoy yacking with the besties & family etc. Hate making professional capacity calls etc. Or even ones to bank, school and everyday shizzles .

Its vair weird, but I know at least one or two others the same. Think I'd have been on my own forever, no dating or anything without texts! I'd have been rubbish in the olden days as a single mum. I used to hate sitting in the hallway (why were phones always in the hallway??) talking to bf's even when I was a teen. Just spooked me out and I am a rl chatterbox . I'm sure in my younger days I lost one or two potential bf's as I never ever called.

I say yippee for text messaging!

watch the chitchat I do find weird, it's what Barbour did to me as well. We went from a bit of mild flirting to just general conversation! although he then switched back to attempted sexting as well Men are odd.

time the Scot's job is pretty awful, I don't think he had any idea what it would be like before he agreed to come here - he has to spend a good few hours every day driving on the M25 (which is a pretty hellish experience even if you're used to London traffic) plus he's starting work any time from 1am-7am each day.

Tbh it suits me that he's too busy to see me atm cos I have loads going on this week much as I would like a repeat of last weekend I do actually feel much more relaxed about it all now I've heard from him, even though he hasnt mentioned seeing me again (yet!).

Morning everyone. I tried to update last night but the thread was full.

Well we did chat I didn't get my note book of questions out. He came round spoke about work for ages and told me he has been very stressed out and he has lost weight poor him blah blah blah and I felt like he probably wanted someone to mother him which I can be good at but I just don't want to.

I dont feel like much has changed and feel like he is boring and I am more Into the drama then him which is a massive concern on its own. And if I was going to be in a relationship with him I would be settling for much less then what I need and deserve!

So I left it as I will think about things although he did ask if we could do something together this weekend so wow massive improvement! Anyway I really feel like getting with him would stop my chances of meeting a guy I actually want. I don't want to have any guy just because I am lonely as I think being with someone that cannot give you even half of what you want will make you more lonely thane being alone!

So I'm off to meet fwb which is a whole different drama but at least the physical side is very good

I will be back to catch up later

I couldn't MrsKL, I just couldn't, it stuck in my throat

Sponge good attitude . I would hate his job, he has my sympathy.

As far as I am aware I am very emotionally available. But not a love sick puppy.