Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Help i have no idea how to deal with this... Regarding dp beyond drunk, A bit gross

449 replies

Close2breaking · 04/03/2012 00:51

Im so upset right now its beyond belief.

Bit of background, Me and Dp have been having 'chats' now over the last couple of weeks about how im getting seriously pee'd of with things around the house. Things like clean clothes and washing being dumped on the floor, shoes coats etc being dumped anywhere, stuff not being put back where it belongs. Im masssively pregnant and have pgp so ive explained things are getting much harder and more painful for me to do. He agrees yes ok fair point he will be more aware to try not to make more work for me to do then needed

Tonight. He goes out 'for a few' with friend we shall call X instead of me and him going for a meal. Thats fine in itself but i no when X and him are together it tends to turn into a few hundred drinks. Left me sat up waiting as he wouldnt be late. He left at 6 maybe and has just strolled through up to bed. Saw him getting out of the taxi walking rather strange so i think wonderful his drunk.

He gets in bed and i think wow he stinks of alcohol and well... crap. Say have you trumped? No. ok awesome walk down stairs to get a drink this smell is horrific. I find his tshirt on the conservatory floor with shit smears all over it. His jeans full of crap in the washer. Have a cry and go upstairs to get him out of bed. Stands up obviously hasnt been bothered to wash or even wipe theres now crap all over half the bed and some on myself. Im mentally breaking down at this point. His obviously sat on the sofa too as it stinks. Send him for a bath which he apparently has had and cleaned himself and i then find 'it' all over some towels. the downstairs toilet looks like both ends have exploaded and stinks beyond anything ive ever known.

Ive tried to get anything out of him like WTF has happened, why didnt he do anything about it, where the hell his boxers are, why the hell did he get in bed next to me like that. apparently he didnt know. which is bollox because if he hadnt known he would have got undressed upstairs and he wouldnt have put his jeans in the wash.

I dont know what i ever expect anyone to say but obviously i dont feel i can rant about this in RL so even if no one says anything its off my chest a little :) . Seriously where do i take it from here? What am i suppose to say to him.

And no i am not the poo troll unfortunatly this is what my sat night has become and i have name changed

OP posts:
garlicbutter · 04/03/2012 00:55

Argh. I'm assuming he's so utterly drunk he's completely lost control of everything? No good talking to him until tomorrow afternoon, then.

Have you got somewhere to sleep?

VelcroFanjo · 04/03/2012 00:56

That's one "shit" night!! I had a BF who used to wet the bed when pissed..you have my sympathies. When he is sober you need to try to talk to him. Getting so bladdered that he soils himself is not on, disgusting and unhealthy. Is there a reason he gets so bad?

YankNCock · 04/03/2012 00:59

Have you got other kids? If not, I'd say take yourself to a hotel and leave a note saying you'll be back when he's sorted it all out and done something spectacular by way of apology.

Tortington · 04/03/2012 01:00

it is disgusting and wrong

but you can't reason this - he got drunk and shit hmeself - he wont remember tomorrow

there is no reason why he got into bed bnext to you with shit on himself - he was drunk

no reason why he doesn't know where his boxers are - he was drunk

if he neds to get so drunk he shits himself - he need to stay at X's hosue

Fakeblondie · 04/03/2012 01:06

Is he actually ok ? Sorry to have to mention it but he hasnt been hurt down there has he ?

oldqueenie · 04/03/2012 01:10

yuk yuk and double yuk. this is completely unnaceptable. do not clear up. can you sleep somewhere else? wake him up bright and early then go out until he has sorted it. if this is what happens when he drinks then he has a problem.

Selks · 04/03/2012 01:13

Oh my goodness...poor you and Angry at your DH!

I'd be tempted to go out and leave the mess exactly as it is for him to clean up on his hangover. Beyond gross.

lovesineffable · 04/03/2012 01:14

how utterly horrific for you.
might he have been using other substances..some illegal drugs have laxative effects

LesserOfTwoWeevils · 04/03/2012 01:18

Gross.
Don't clean up his mess?leave it for him to do in the morning so he can see exactly how bad it was and hopefully be so embarrassed he'll never dare get that drunk again.

AThingInYourLife · 04/03/2012 01:19

Oh Jesus, that's so fucking vile.

Being in a bed full of shit because someone was so drunk they soiled themselves and couldn't manage not to get it all over me would be the death of romantic love for me.

I would be making other plans for my life than sleeping in a shitty bed in a shit smeared house with an incontinent dipso.

Original poster
Close2breaking · 04/03/2012 01:19

hello thank you for reading such a vomit inducing thread.

no I have no where to sleep because after leaving him to bath i went downstairs to try and sort well anything. try to contain the smell by shutting the conservatory doors etc and he went and got in the kids bed. while he still had it on him. lovely! thankgod his son was here yesterday and not today. so its on the beds and on the sofa im currently sat at the kitchen table.

how much i would love to bugger of to a hotel unfortunatly i dont drive so am pretty stuck and limited as what i can do at gone 1 :(

i have no idea why he gets this bad seems to start and cant stop apparently. we have had issues regarding this in the past. well the drunk bit not the crap.

no idea if he is hurt physically his ego might have taken a bashing though

OP posts:
oldqueenie · 04/03/2012 01:22

is this your first baby? poor you.

AThingInYourLife · 04/03/2012 01:22

Get a taxi to a hotel.

Nobody should be expected to spend the night in a shit-covered house with sn animal like him spreading filth everywhere.

You can't bring a baby into a house like that.

carernotasaint · 04/03/2012 01:24

Could you go and stay at the in laws. That might shame the arsehole enough into bucking his ideas up especially when they find out the reason.

Original poster
Close2breaking · 04/03/2012 01:25

xposts.

im pretty sure i guess about no drugs or whatever. ive phoned x and his GF answered who i know. she thought he was still out in town with them he had told them he was off to the toilet and they werestood waiting around the corner for him.

asked what his been doing and it was drinks at x house then the pub then town. she said his pretty drunk but thats about it and very grateful i had phoned or they would have been there all night!

OP posts:
Original poster
Close2breaking · 04/03/2012 01:27

No chance of the inlaws or my mum being awake at this hour.

Yes this is our first baby and he already has a son who comes on the weekend.

Think ill have a google of hotels close by now im pretty bloody tired.

OP posts:
Fakeblondie · 04/03/2012 01:35

I don't think you understood. What I meant was are you sure he hasnt been Assaulted ?

lovesineffable · 04/03/2012 01:36

his ego deserves a bashing, if he cant stop he shouldnt make the decision to start in the first place.

His behaviour is utterly abhorrent, vile beyond belief no-one should have to put up with something like that.
I dont know what to suggest, except that you must at the very least insist that he addresses his drink problem, if he drinks again then he is deliberately risking a repeat performance.
What is he, regressing to babyhood because he feels threatened that a new baby will take up too much of your attention.
Sorry to be so harsh but it does all seem rather freudian

Original poster
Close2breaking · 04/03/2012 01:36

sorry fake. what do you mean been assaulted down there?

OP posts:
YankNCock · 04/03/2012 01:40

Yes, definitely get a taxi to a hotel, hope you get some sleep.

Fakeblondie · 04/03/2012 01:43

well it's not normal to be be incontinent of your bowels even when very drunk.I've seen many drunks in a and e over the years and many pee but never poo.

StEmmenthal · 04/03/2012 01:44

I'd kick him out in the morning. Totally unacceptable.

NatashaBee · 04/03/2012 01:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

garlicbutter · 04/03/2012 01:45

Another supporter here! Taxi, hotel, leave Shitty with his shit. He'll figure it out when he wakes up

Sorry, but this made me cackle: sleeping in a shitty bed in a shit smeared house with an incontinent dipso.

After you've had a nice kip in a lovely CLEAN hotel room, come back and talk to us about drinking and stuff. Sweet dreams!

garlicbutter · 04/03/2012 01:46

Fake, it happens.

Swipe left for the next trending thread