Husband going AWOL

[ladybird69]

Hi Newbie here, I just need some advice :-( going through a bad patch and husband of 26 yrs keeps going away to get his head together! BUT he takes no clothes with him or brings any back, plus now he doesnt even take his shaver etc!!!! what do you think? i know what my gut feelings are but should i give him the benefit of the doubt as per usual? thanks

me thinks they are trying to tell you something??

Am confused - who hates him? And do they not live with you then?

i am not sure whether to feel v sorry for you op or to suggest that NO ONE is that gullable, surely?

Sorry but if he takes no clothes and brings none back he must have another home, flat elsewhere.

I can't see the point of saying he is in charge for the weekend - what would that do? If he had made plans he may get annoyed or just go anyway.

Why don't you look out the window and write the reg number down?

Have you checked any paperwork?

I would be inclined to get kids off for the weekend next time he does this. Get a few sleepovers at your under your belt then call in a favour when you need it.

Get a friend or neighbour to look after the dog - cats can be left Ok for a weekend with one of those feeder things if you have cat flaps.

Free yourself up and follow him.

Can you afford a PI?

He bought car around the same time as he started disappearing sept. he hides it sorry keeps it at his friends house behind closed gates. he away usually every other weekend but can just turn around and say I'm off!!! He swears he just needs space to think!!!!

Mid life crisis anyone??? Sorry you are going through this.. I thought ny STBXH was a crap liar (didn't need to be a body language expert to know he was hiding something in his phone) but yours is just taking the piss .. He doesn't think you will do anything so not even trying to hide it! x

Divorce on grounds of unreasonable behaviour, methinks?

Lol sorry animals hate him!!! would love to hire a PI anyone know a good one? sorry I am so trusting, I judge others on myself and would never hurt another human being the way he's hurting me.

Liars wife my hubby has 3 phones!!! his computer is always locked and I never know where he is!!! OMG

Quin, do you really think so?

I know I sound a tad unsympathetic, but you don't sound very upset!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

dont your children ask him ?s??

Your husband has a new car, which is out of bounds to you.
Your husband goes away without notice, without luggage, and you are not welcome.
Your husband has no mobile connection while he is gone.
Your husband takes no clothes and no toiletries, yet returns clean and showered.
Your husband cannot explain where he has been, and has not spent any money on b&b.
Your husband gets all upset and hurt if you dare question him, mainly because he has no answer that can sound plausible.

This is not reasonable behaviour.

Unlikely, I am Hun, but I've been living through this since sept and need answers, but he still comes out with the line'I need time to think'

I dont know any PI's but google or yell.com them.

I would just hire one asap and get them onto the case if you are that concerned.

I cannot believe you have not been more suspicious before now and started digging.

Can you not get him to take you out in his new car?

Just get a PI to track where he goes. It will cost you but you'll have answers after just one weekend.

Op I think you know the answer and just wanted it confirming.

Its half term in a week or 2. I would tell him you need space and fuck off for the full 9 days, untraceable and see wtf he does, says and thinks.

He goes out with no change of clothes or shaver, comes back clean as a whistle. Has just bought himself a sportscar. How obvious does it have to be?

I think you need to have a serious talk. Tell him this is unreasonable behaviour and you won't tolerate it any more.

How old are your kids?

Quin, maybe he went to friends? switched off phone............
scrap that he tells me he's away sight seeing! without me, all on his lonesome, and yes no luggage etc!!!!
stupid huh

Is he there now or is he 'sightseeing' at the moment?

Well, if he went to friends, or to sight see, he would not really have a problem telling you who he was staying with, or what he has seen.

Next time he is back, tell him to show your photos....

kids are 23, 21, 16 and 13

he wouldnt let me go away and leave him with everything, he'd go mad!

Onion rings he's away at mo, thats why I'm on here. and Quin no gossip or photos when he comes back and no washing or luggage too!!!

but it's ok for him to go away and leave you with everything?