Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Just found a condom wrapper

582 replies

KissMyShineyRedA · 20/12/2011 14:54

I'm freaking out. As some of you know my DP went on a business trip. He borrowed my bag for hand luggage. I've just found the corner piece of a condom wrapper. I don't know what to do. I need to ask him face-to-face. Is there any way this could be innocent?! Help

OP posts:
ClaraSage · 21/12/2011 09:16

Are you going to ask him to explain?
The best thing to do really as all this speculating will drive you mad.

Original poster
KissMyShineyRedA · 21/12/2011 09:18

I don't feel strong.

Woke up today like it was a dream. I'm going to call him when I finish work at 2pm and ask him to come over and sound as normal as I can manage.

Then I'll just say I found this, how did it get in here?

I feel like I don't even want to ask him today, I want to ignore it but I know I can't.

OP posts:
PeppermintPasty · 21/12/2011 09:22

You'll go mad if you don't, and you deserve to know. Good luck chick.

dreamingbohemian · 21/12/2011 09:23

You may not feel strong, but you ARE strong. You can do this! It sucks so much, I know, but you will get through this.

This may sound stupid but -- do you have any kick-ass music that puts you in a feisty mood?

There's been many a time when I've put on some old school punk, or Hole, or Wu Tang, just so I can feel all RAWR and able to deal with dodgy men.

We are all here for you!

Original poster
KissMyShineyRedA · 21/12/2011 09:23

I was lying awake at 1am and I suddenly remembered I had put two handbags inside the bag beforehand to store. I remember pulling them out before giving it to him. Maybe they fell out of there. But then I thought but there wouldn't have been condoms in those bags as I haven't used one in years in my room. Also I got a new bed last year and hoovered all under it and pulled everything out.
Plus I remember opening the bag before and showing him the straps it has inside, surely I would've noticed the wrapper then? But what of it was down the side of the crease as its a small corner?

This is my mind last night^ as you can imagine I'm not looking my best today!

OP posts:
imaginethat · 21/12/2011 09:24

Good luck, I hope you get answers and a happy ending, even.

Let us know how you get on.

Original poster
KissMyShineyRedA · 21/12/2011 09:25

dreaming I've been playing Florence's new album which has helped, I never usually listen to music but had it playing last night and it made me feel stronger

OP posts:
Collision · 21/12/2011 09:28

oh dear. Am sad for you but I do think he has cheated.

Condoms in bag, gone floppy, asking for space - it does not look good.

ClaraSage · 21/12/2011 09:29

You are strong and you'll be fine wathever the outcome but it's best to know so you can move forwards (whatever the explanation)

dreamingbohemian · 21/12/2011 09:45

Oh Florence is ace!

What else makes you perk up? Exercise? Hobbies? A favourite film?

Be kind to yourself...

Robotindisguise · 21/12/2011 09:51

Kiss - I advised you to dump him on the other thread because you said he makes you feel like shit.

Chances are tonight he'll swear blind you're being paranoid and you'll start to doubt yourself. But you know, don't you, that this relationship is not right?

momnipotent · 21/12/2011 10:05

'Chick empowerment music' I call it. Works wonders. :)

999HELPMYPUDDINGSONFIRE · 21/12/2011 11:18

Any update on this one?
I'm new to this site but this for me would be worrying, especially as he was away.
I'd say it was a 1 nighter but then i always think the worst,
Hoping he was just having a posh wank!
My other half admits to doing these but when he was a lot younger!

BecauseImperfect · 21/12/2011 12:02

Posh wanks do exist. I imagine if you are heading towards your 50's this might be a difficult concept to grasp. It's a relatively new thing. Like musical tastes and fashions change, same with sex.

The public sector do in fact share rooms now, budget cuts and all that. Just done it in London. No I can't reveal the job so don't ask.

Could it be one of these two? Only you know that.

PeppermintPasty · 21/12/2011 12:11
Biscuit
ImperialBlether · 21/12/2011 12:13

You're so funny, BecauseImperfect. Why do you think someone heading towards her 50s would find a posh wank a difficult concept to grasp? Are you trying to be offensive and patronising?

And why do you think the OP is nearly 50, when she lives with her mum?

Oh and nobody would dream of asking you about your job.

BecauseImperfect · 21/12/2011 12:15

I wan't talking about her. I was talking about the older posters who don't seem to have kept up with what happens nowadays.

It is a possibility, he did have a posh wank. Seems to be a hard conceot to grasp for some.

PeppermintPasty · 21/12/2011 12:16

Oh and nobody would dream of asking you about your job Xmas Grin

PeppermintPasty · 21/12/2011 12:17

Uh? Where did we all clock in our ages?

member · 21/12/2011 12:19

If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck then....

Sorry OP

BecauseImperfect · 21/12/2011 12:20

Got one of the many Christmas cookies stuck in your throat pp? Could only start to find your voice with another?

I don't have time to join in with wagon jumpers. It's obvious who are older, who are single, who has been cheated on. You all give it away so easily.

Have another Biscuit

PeppermintPasty · 21/12/2011 12:21

Thanks. You're a bit strange aren't you.

Saturdaynightbeaver · 21/12/2011 12:21

I'm 93 next May. I INVENTED the posh wank

ImperialBlether · 21/12/2011 12:23

Now there's no need to talk about BecauseImperfect like that, member.

ImperialBlether · 21/12/2011 12:23

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.