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Original poster

The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Head To The Summer Of Sobriety

1001 replies

Mouseface · 08/06/2011 22:32

Hello

I'm Mouse Smile

Welcome aboard The Brave Babe's Battle Bus. There are a whole host of lovely posters here who will support your journey to sobriety, however you choose to get there.

We are a Bus full of drinkers, non-drinkers and those who are somewhere in between.

BUT - we will never judge or leave a poster out in the cold. So, find a seat and settle down for the journey ahead.

And HERE is the last thread and those before it too. Just follow the links to read the journeys so far.

OP posts:
Fairenuff · 29/06/2011 20:28

Well done steering clear of the Lambrini ru. May be best to steer clear from the whole aisle to avoid temptation? I've deleted all alcohol from my Tesco 'favourites' Smile. Another sober day for me too (day 4).

Fairenuff · 29/06/2011 20:33

lucilastic also meant to say what a fab idea to look back at your old posts to remind yourself what you are doing this for. Also, I think some people here have said on here about seeing your evening as a movie and watch it all the way to the sorry end. I like your determination.

lucilastic · 29/06/2011 21:00

Thank you Fairenuff. DP said to me tonight that maybe I could just have one or two over the weekend. I can never have just one or two and TBH I have never wanted to. I have always drunk to get hammered. I think he knows this too deep down but he's worried and apprehensive about living with a boring abstainer.

He is a binge drinker at times too but to me they are socially acceptable. A drink with the boys, Xmas, New Year etc. The rest of the time he can have a beer or two in the evening or on a nice day in the garden.

lucilastic · 29/06/2011 21:02

In contrast I binge almost every time I drink. The only times I have drank in moderation is when there has been hardly any alcohol available. [shame]

Fairenuff · 29/06/2011 21:15

I am the same lucilastic except I don't actually set out to get hammered but just keep going when clearly I've had enough. Don't think about the weekend yet, just the rest of today. Do you have a favourite replacement drink ( I have buckets of lime and soda and bags of ice to keep me going for now). Soon be bedtime Smile

dementedma · 30/06/2011 09:38

I'm meeting Venus tonight. What a strange thing to write Grin
Can't remember if we said 7 or 7.30 though....d'oh!

Zanywany · 30/06/2011 09:40

HI everyone

Hope it goes OK today Mouse, am I right in thinking you'll get a few hours to yourself?

Hi Starmucks I was at Glastonbury at the weekend too, was amazing. I didn't manage sober but didn't have as much as I usually would - who wants to be ill at the long drops Grin

I had been managing to drink in moderation ish but have had a bottle a night the last few nights so feel annoyed with myself.

Oh well todays another day

NeverGotABabby · 30/06/2011 09:56

Thanks so much for the welcome. Hope you are all well.

Well I managed not to drink last night Grin There was beer in the house. I probably would have drank if I was on my own but DP was there and I didn't want him to think I couldn't do it. Instead went to bed early and he scratched my back which is a treat I love.

Didn't sleep until after 3 though. Does anyone else have trouble sleeping without booze?

Feel great this morning though. No hangover! Grin Thanks again.

I tried to go to AA once but the people were all very nosy and clingy which I hated. It's nice in here though.

venusandmars · 30/06/2011 10:03

ma I'm the same, I had to look at my messages to find out. We said 7.30. I'll pm you my mobile no in case anything goes wrong (or in case you peek in through the window, see me looking fabulous and tall and tanned and slim, and decide not to join me Grin).

Or in case you look in through the window and see that I am really a hairy-arsed trucker, and the uber-troll of uber-tolls Shock

MIFLAW · 30/06/2011 10:35

"he's worried and apprehensive about living with a boring abstainer."

He is assuming, therefore, that an abstainer is automatically boring.

Do you have any Muslim friends? Are all Muslims boring?

If you are anything like me, you are FAR more boring with a drink than without one; perhaps you need to point that out to him?

In my experience, most problem drinkers are quite full-on and unpredictable people, even without a drink in them; you are very unlikely to be a boring sober person.

I think what he probably means (but won't say) is that he is worried you will try to stop him drinking.

So just decide, right now, that you won't. And tell him that.

venusandmars · 30/06/2011 10:40

nevergotababby well done, for last night, but can you tell us what YOU really think about your drinking? Are you glad that your DP called you on it because it gives you the kick that you need to do something about it for yourself? The reason that I'm asking is that if you're a problem drinker (i.e. find difficulty controlling / moderating your own drinking), then there's got to be something really deep inside YOU that wants to change. You can try, and try fro the sake of someone else, but at the end of the day the desire to change has to come from within you. I know that in my own life, trying to stop 'for someone else' only made me resentful of his control and resulted in me being secretive and deceitful about my drinking.

venusandmars · 30/06/2011 11:27

Hi zany, glad you survived the mud of Glastonbury Smile. What you wrote is almost word for word what I could have written last year "drinking moderately-ISH Hmm" and then immediately going back to the bottle a night routine. I've got to be honest here and say that we all know that a bottle on one night is a lot, a bottle on several consecutive nights is pretty heavy drinking. If nothing else, over the last year I've learned that the majority of people drink no-where near that amount - ever. However much I tried to normalise my drinking habits (by comparing myself to others, or by deluding myself that I was functioning perfectly well) I knew that it was not normal. I aslo know that for now, drinking moderately does not work for me. I could do it for a short while, but always, always returned to my previous levels.

You wrote in a previous post that things weren't quite so fab with dp. Don't let life trip you up zany. Come back on here, post about what's happening. Stay with us.

rusmum · 30/06/2011 11:55

Same here for a bottle (or 2) a night. Done this for the last year at least!

dementedma · 30/06/2011 12:11

Grinat Venus
how do you know I don't have a thing for hairy arsed truckers?

lucilastic · 30/06/2011 12:32

Miflaw you are right, I am a boring bloody drunk. I repeat myself constantly, slur my words and eventually black out but not usually before I've initiated a ridiculous row with someone over absolutely nothing.
My problem is that when I am anxious and worried (my youngest DC has speech delay and I am obsessed that she may have autism) I crave the calming affects of drink, no matter how short lived they are and how much crappier I feel afterwards. I need to find some other way of switching my worries off for a while. I know getting smashed isn't the answer but my alcoholic mind is whispering "but just have one or two. It doesn't have to be like all the other times."
It's so hard sometimes...life.

lucilastic · 30/06/2011 12:34

Enjoy your meet up Ma and Venus.

jesuswhatnext · 30/06/2011 12:46

morning!!

Grin at the thought of venus being a hairy arsed trucker! i dont think they are quite so sensitive and kind!

catch up later!

love to all

L XXX

MIFLAW · 30/06/2011 13:25

"It's so hard sometimes...life."

Very true. Who told you it wasn't?

But a drink doesn't make it easier, or else you wouldn't be on this thread - you'd be opening up an off-licence to make money off a miracle cure!

Zanywany · 30/06/2011 13:58

One of the reasons I haven't posted much is because a while ago DP had a look through quite a few of my posts on here as he felt I was being distant and wanted to know why. To say I felt violated is an understatement, I must have mentioned my user name which I use for a festival site in passing never thinking he would look through it. He has said he will never look again but I have been very apprehensive about posting things (and annoyed that I felt I couldn't) .I also saw my XP at Glasto which was a big shock as I (and him) found it very upsetting to be reminded how much I loved him. Been feeling very confused but thats no excuse for drinking too much again so I gave myself a talking to this morning Grin

qo · 30/06/2011 14:38

zany that's happened to me too, twice. once (that I know of) by my sister and also by my ex. It's horrible isn't it, when you don't feel safe to post - I still dont feel safe posting even though that all happened years ago

Zanywany · 30/06/2011 14:55

I felt as if he had read my diary qo. The annoying thing is we have only been going out a few months and I have been very open with him about my drinking and other things and yet it still felt it wasn't enough! Think he was more gutted though as at the time I was posting about a neighbour (who I nkew before DP) who I had a huge bit of a crush on and was saying I wasn't sure I was that into DP! Hopefully he will think twice now. Right off to pick the DC's up but will catch up later

lucilastic · 30/06/2011 16:35

Zany, that's awful. I can kind of see why he did it (I am a nosy sod) but I totally get why you feel pissed off and that he's trying to invade your personal thoughts. As regards the stuff about the neighbour, you did nothing wrong so if he feels jealous or crap about it then it's his fault for snooping. Hope you're ok.

Original poster
Mouseface · 30/06/2011 18:37

Zany - for the love of Jeff, that is awful of your DP. Very intrusive.

I cancelled Nemo's respite today as my MIL and SIL were coming and Nemo's teeth are hurting him loads, he's got earache with it too poor little chap.

There appears to be a few issues with the respite too. We are supposed the have the same person so that Nemo can get used to them. No, sorry, that's not the case Hmm

So I now have to srot that out after waiting for years for it to happen. Meh.

Well done luci! I was thinking about you today, hoping you were okay. Smile

Rus - avoiding the booze ailse is never easy, my biggest wobble was passing that!

Been to the docs for my MRI (official) results, as the consultant said. He's upped my dose of morphine again so I need to get myself sorted because I now don't feel happy driving.

Anyway, Ma and venus - have a wonderful evening. Smile xx

OP posts:
Silver66 · 30/06/2011 19:27

Hmm Mouse you have to let someone else help sometime lovely - you have to let go a bit, just a bit at a time......Nemo will be safe..... you need some time out Wink

rusmum · 30/06/2011 19:29

another dry day/eve! YAY! Not even tempted today which is good.

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