He's Locked Me Out

[FromDespairToWhere]

I posted a few days ago about wanting to leave H. Last night I went out with my best friend for a meal and a few drinks. H texted while out telling me not to bother coming home. Many more texts and phone calls followed and I told him I would stay at my mum's as it was late and I didn't want to get the DCs involved in a big row.

This morning he rang to say that he was not going to let me back in the house and if I tried he would physically remove me, chuck all my things out or call the police. He is refusing to let me near DS2 and has said he will go for full custody of him. He has allowed me to speak to DS1 but had already told him that I didn't care about him and DS1 seemed very confused and scared.

I've got an appt to see a family lawyer this afternoon but would appreciate some advice or hand holding.

previous threads

"The police can force H to let me back in but they will not always support me if I tried to remove the DSs from the property."

Well if he has no "right" to DS1, would they support the boys being seperated?

Can you not get back into the house while he is out OP? And then if he tries to physically remove you, you can report him for assault and then he WILL be removed from the house. This makes my blood boil and am so angry on your behalf. No court would split up the children, and as he has no rights to your son you would get the children.

WHF? Seriously, go and get counselling after this, you have not told your ds's dad that his son has been kidnapped as the kidnapper does not like him?????

You will end up in court with both men taking both kids off you at this rate OP!

Go to the farm / your house (farm is probably finished and a red herring now) and get your kids!

You also need to get the other father involved IMO. Who cares if P hates him or not? This is HIS child and you need as much support as possible.

Your children are at the centre of this...if he wants to play dirty then you have to play dirtier still. At the moment he thinks he can walk all over you; you nedd to square up to him (metaphorically speaking) and show him you will not take his crap.

Have you spoken to a solicitor yet? There are just TWO HOURS till the end of the working week, when everything will get more complicated.

The longer he has your son, the more it looks (to a court) like that is the status quo, and that he should have custody.

Get a Yellow Pages and phone a family law solicitor NOW!

Never mind GORGEOUS2 you'll be back to school next week :)

While he is out for the day, Get back into the house.

Its so important you stay where your DC are, if not, you could find yourself having the weekend visits etc

Get back into the house, wait for him to arrive, if he throws a fitty, then call the police, and get him removed, for unreasonably behaviour

Even if he does try to get back into the house, you will have your DC with you, whether you stay in the house, or leave with both children

Why did he lock you out?

just for going out?

he really is a vindictive piece of work, it seems from your more recent posts the ball is rolling to get things sorted.

Really worried on your behalf, please keep us posted

Do not worry about the house, just get them boys back

Excellent advice from takeresponsibility.

And as she says you cannot be charged with damaging your own property.

With the weekend fast approaching you should get back to your house immdiately, get inside if he is not there and phone the police to say that your H has threatened you and you are frightened (which he has and I assume you are). The matter then becomes a criminal one not a civil on.

Surely he has been abusive by telling you not to come home last night & by now refusing to let you in?

Do you have any proof that he told you not to go home & that he is refusing to let you in?

Otherwise I´m sure he´ll just say that you went out last night, stayed out & haven´t been home all day.

FromDespair,

Why aren't you taking the advice you've been offered here?

PLEASE, go back to your house (with someone you trust if possible) and get back inside, even if it means ringing an emergency locksmith or asking a neighbour to help you break back in. Just say you've lost your keys. YOU WILL NOT BE BREAKING THE LAW IN ANY WAY WHATSOEVER.

Once inside don't leave, whatever your husband says or does. Ring the police as soon as he threatens you or attempts to throw you out.

It you don't act now, your DH will have the upper hand in this situation and things could turn very nasty for you regarding custody of your son. .

Agree massively with MrsFlittersnoop, what a terrible situation your in OP, please realise how serious this situation is, and how much more serious it [with your rights to your DC] will become if you do not take this advice

Any news...? bumps

The police already know of the situation, if she then breaks in and says she's lost her keys, surely her husband can press charges, for criminal damage if she breaks a window, kicks a door in etc....

Or the police can charge her for breach of the peace as somone else said up thread?

She has as much right to be in the house as he does but not to cause damage to the property.

Not sure I'd be able to control myself to be fair.

I'd go through the window if I were you. I would also let the police know I was doing it. Dont let ANYONE keep you from your DC.

Mouseface, if she has to break a window to get back into HER house because she has been locked out she will NOT be charged with criminal damage! The house is jointly owned, therefore the OP has as much right to access as her husband.

People lose their keys all the time and have to force entry to their own property! It is NOT a breach of the peace either, especially if you explain to your neighbours that you have been locked out, so no-one will report you for suspicious behaviour.

Forcing entry while her H and the DC are inside would be a different matter, but in that case, she needs to ring the police and ask them to come round before she attempts to gain access.

If he's not there (no threat of violence), and there is an open window, and you informed the police of your intentions, that's different IMO.

This guy is so unhinged that I have little doubt he'd try and have her arrested, just to keep her away from her son/s. (DS1 is his only I think?)

Sorry but that's what I was told by Greater Manchester Police when my pyscho of an ex stole my house keys out of my bag and locked me out.

With MY daughter inside the house.

If I'm wrong, then I apologise but I remeber that day pretty clearly.

'remember'

OP - I hope that you and your children are safe wherever you are x

Oh my god this is just absolutely awful, please please please do whatever it takes, go and get your boys...please. If you don't take action NOW, you will regret it for the rest of your life, you owe THEM to do something...anything....everything you can possible do!

If he went out of the house then you could have just let yourself back in.....................with or without the help of locksmith!

Cut the glass out of the window...or employ someone to do it....not hard....they canremove a pane and you get in.

OR take a lockmith there and have him open the door and immediately rplace locks. Your house you can do this.