I found some porn in my bathroom

[Stupiditysquared]

.. and asked the DCs if they'd downloaded it.

This was a pretty stupid thing to do. Nuclear war has erupted. The trouble was that in 18 years of marriage, DH has never used porn (so far as I am aware). He never normally goes into that bathroom, whereas the DCs do. Also I did not know that he'd been at home. It never occurred to me that it was him.

Now DD is screaming at her father that he is a filthy pervert. He's screaming at me for being stupid, which in fairness it was. And I'm in shock really.

What next

Dittany - get your head out of your own arse and accept that people have a different opinion to you.

I'm not sure any of this is helping the OP any more. :(

Hope you're OK, OP.

loopy, it can't possibly be

Worraliberty - who funds the making of sexetera? You sound absolutely naive to believe all that chat about how it's all such lovely fun to work in the porn industry. Do you believe all the rubbish you are fed by TV? Coming from Eastern Europe as I do I have lived cheek by jowl with prostitution and seen the ex countries become a haven for porn makers. It certainly is not all jolly good japes. Next you'll be saying that Katie Price et all write their own books.

You guys need to start another thread and argue about porn over there. This thread has been totally hijacked and the OP's family's situation is now being used as currency in this pro/anti-porn debate, which is inappropriate and insensitive.

I for one do believe that there are some people who enjoy being in porn films but they would technically be exhibitionists and they wouldn't need to be paid to do it - it would be for their own sexual benefit - and it is at this point all porn would become automatically free because it would no longer be a commercial transaction

That's an interesting thought but there are free amateur porn sites on the internet where people/couples submit their own home made movies for fun. But the exhibitionists in properly directed movies want to make a career and money out of it. So although they may be happy to do it for free from a sexual point of view, from a business point it makes sense not to submit free videos on the internet.

A bit like an actor I suppose who might be quite happy to put on a free village show in a theater but really wants to make a living from acting.

I doubt the OP will be back thanks to the twitterers.

It's time for the ShellyLubben link again ..isn't it?

can't believe someone tweeted this thread either. it's prurient and completely out of order.

For those in the industry (Squeakytoy etc) does the porn industry have any kind of self-regulating award system where porn is labelled as having a morally clean provenance? I for one do believe that there are some people who enjoy being in porn films but they would technically be exhibitionists and they wouldn't need to be paid to do it - it would be for their own sexual benefit - and it is at this point all porn would become automatically free because it would no longer be a commercial transaction. Are any of your glamour models true exhibitionists or are they all getting paid for their photos? Isn't the thrill of having their photo taken and knowing people will be wanking to it enough for them?

Yes. There are regulations, lots and lots of them. I agree, those who are willingly in the films are exhibitionists. They would have to be really, wouldnt they! But they still expect to earn money for what they do. Just as any other actor or model would.

The porn industry even has its own Oscars ceremony.

As I said last night, I dont shoot pornography. I do make portfolios for models who are in the porn business. The work I do is not porn in any form. I also do lots of other work too.. it is not my main subject, but it has given me a far greater insight into how the business works than most people.

I will not deny there is illegal porn on the black market, and the women in many of those films are not paid good money, if paid at all, and are forced into it. That does not mean I condone it.

There are clothing sweatshops all over the world in which small children are abused and made to work every waking hour for no or little pay, does that mean I should not buy any clothes?

As I have repeatedly said, children should be protected from porn, most certainly hardcore porn. It is very difficult to do that nowadays with the internet making it very easily accessible to anyone.

I think the husband in the op was very much in the wrong for leaving his pornographic material in a place where it could be found, although I do truly believe the op that this was accidental on his part. Very stupid too and he is wholly to blame for that.

Eurostar Do you watch the series? I'm guessing from your post that you don't.

Give it a go and listen to the interviews yourself. I'm not saying all people in the industry like it or that none of them are pushed into it, but I was answering a question with my post and pointing out that some absolutely love their chosen career paths.

Dittany - not every woman in porn is being raped. What is it about that sentence that you find so hard to comprehend?

Dittany, I really have to say this..

For someone who is so vehemently opposed to, and disgusted by porn, you seem very very keen to type out the graphic description as often as you can in every post you make.

Is there a particular reason why you do that?

I really hope Op gets this thread removed

Chipping The OP's DD reacted the way she did, there's no changing that - she seems disgusted at her dad and wanted to know the worst. She lives in a house with her dad full time and her views of her dad had been shattered - many people would react in a similar way and want to know the worst to try and "touch the bottom" (no porn pun intended) before she can process how she feels about it. Understandably, she couldn't begin to reconcile her view of her dad with this new view she was presented with until she knew the depths of what she was dealing with. She could have felt the same way if it was scantily clad ladies as you say. I'm not sure I understand the point you are making - is that it is now the DD's fault she exposed herself to her dad's internet history? I think a lot of (technically savvy) 14 year olds would have done the same. WWIFN explained the DD's reaction better than I am but the fact remains that unless the OP's DH had not left the porn in the family bathroom, none of this would have happened. And if he had not been so convincing in his lies to the OP about his use of porn, or chosen to use a bathroom he doesn't usually use, this wouldn't have evolved in the way it did. But instead of stepping up and saying Shit big mistake, OP, we need to talk he turned shouty and defensive and blamed the OP.

Dittany that's certainly an about tail for you - not that long ago you were givng the OP a hard time for not protecting her daughter and for not doing enough about this

Popcrackle you can research porn and make sure the models are happy just as you can research and find that the clothes you wear were not produced by abusing children.

The bit which is so hard for you to comprehend is that women in the porn industry do get raped you idiot

Do you not realise that most of it is actually acting, you idiot?