I found some porn in my bathroom

[Stupiditysquared]

.. and asked the DCs if they'd downloaded it.

This was a pretty stupid thing to do. Nuclear war has erupted. The trouble was that in 18 years of marriage, DH has never used porn (so far as I am aware). He never normally goes into that bathroom, whereas the DCs do. Also I did not know that he'd been at home. It never occurred to me that it was him.

Now DD is screaming at her father that he is a filthy pervert. He's screaming at me for being stupid, which in fairness it was. And I'm in shock really.

What next

Stepson was about 18/19 at the time.

I am not defending, I am reasoning. There is a difference.

As to the "porn den"... I remember myself and a few friends stumbling upon one too when we were kids... it was where my friends older brother and his mates had been bunking off from school... and they had chosed a questionable choice of wallpaper...

You dont see my agenda at all.. simply because I dont have an agenda. I dont dislike all porn, I dont like all porn.

I said "very female" as a tongue in cheek sort of post really... you know, like the Hilda Ogden quote "all woman"... it was irony.. get it..

I am a woman though.

yeah

the Hilda Ogden quote was "Woman, Stanley, woman "

FYI

she was referring to her lipstick

is that what you were referring to ?

Dittany.. read carefully.

I am not a porn maker.

I take glamour shots of individual models.

That is not porn.

How "glamorous" are we talking?

Tits or fanny?

Ah yes, old school glamour..

Firstly, I am shocked by a lot of this thread, but mostly Shiney's ridiculous assertion that the biggest issue here is DD getting away with shouting at her father. Please ignore that nonsense.

Anyhow, more importantly, OP, would you mind answering a few questions please?

*Have you asked DH why he used that bathroom? What did he say?
*Have you asked DH how long/often he has been using porn? What did he say?
*Is there a bath in his bathroom?
*Have you explained to DH, after this event, how you feel about his porn use?
*Has DH apologised, either to you or the children?
*Is DD OK? Is she just embarrassed or actually freaked out?

DH really needs to talk calmly to the children (and you) and explain himself. If they are old enough to happen across hard core porn in their own space, they are old enough to hear their parent's views on porn use.

Please don't apologise for his behaviour or try to change your views on porn to lessen the impact on his relationship with DD. She feels how she feels about it - you telling her that it is all fine and normal will make her think less of you, not more of him.

Please don't blame yourself for this. He left it there. They are lucky not to have seen it.

Lets just say my camera does not do legs akimbo shots falling... lol!!

I like to go for the subtle look....

I think people who have said 'So what? Teenagers are likely to see porn with their mates' are missing the point. This is about finding porn left lying around by your Dad. And knowing he's been wanking to it.

I can't imagine any teenager being happy with that. So am not the smallest bit surprised that the DD has gone into meltdown.

No Dittany. it isnt...

This thread is fucked up.

It was a clumsy situation, it was dealt with clumsily.

Move on.

Am I the only one who's impressed with how many bathrooms the OPs got?

she has 2 bathrooms yes ?

is that impressive ?

and really, fucked-up family relationships have no link with how many bathrooms you have

squeaky may have a point.

the photos s/he is talking about might be more the stuff guys put up on the wall at work to show they know what bits a woman has and they might even have, y'know, done it. But I imagine that pictures of tits and fur usually come down to be being wank material for a significant number of consumers, even if they couldn't also be used for medical education.

anyhow..

OP sorry for the thread hijack. Your DH is in the wrong - not sure I am adding much there!

3 bathrooms (DD has one she doesn't use) and yes, I was impressed too. Not sure there's correlation between facilities and oddness though...

The images that I do are glamour shots, but are not porn, there is a huge difference..

Side views, soft lighting, body contours... subtle arty shots.. not porn..

If someone wants to wank over it, then fine... but that is not the market it is aimed at.. most of it is private work for clients own personal viewing only.. or models for their portfolio

Ohhhhhhhhhh I see toy's motive become clear.

I for one usually am in the camp, ofgs dittany rolls eyes, so shoot me. But here she is 100% spot on.

But seriously people can't see a Dad going into his childrens personal space basically, which is important to teens, to wank and leaving the material behind. They can't see the issue with that? Use his usual bathroom fgs not the one allocated to the kids.

It's beyond perverse and the people justifying it have beyond fucked up bounderies of what is normal.

All those saying ahh it's different as it's the Dad you can't compare it to a teacher. Yes you can, it's a person of responsibility wanking and leaving sexual material in an area which childen use, to find.

This is why sexual abuse in families is covered up as it's family so it's different. It's always talked away.

Exposing children to sexual material is a form of sexual abuse, accident or not. It's only luck the op found it. So it cannot be classed as that this time, so I'm not saying that is what has happened.

Some seriously fucked up people on here who can't see why this is an issue and why the dd is upset her dad has wanked in her personal, intimate space and left the evidence.

And Dittany.. I wouldnt be out of a job, as it isnt the only type of work I do, it is just a small part of it..

< applauds emmy >

< cannot understand the people who don't think it is a big deal >

< thinks that the row with squeaky is totally irrelevant and wishes she hadn't engaged with it >