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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Carry On Past The Brewery!

1000 replies

Mouseface · 28/09/2010 19:33

Hello.

I'm Mouse and I've been on the bus for 2 months now and not fallen off it as yet. It's much more comfortable than The Wagon! Grin

Anyway, this is thread number nine!

Everyone is welcome to join at any point of the journey, drinking or not, wanting to stop or just to cut down.

Jump on board, you won't be judged, just supported whatever you decide. Smile

Here is the history of The Brave Babes if you want to have a read.

JWN's original thread

Thread two

Thread three

Thread four

Thread five

Thread six

Thread seven

Thread eight

OP posts:
Fortheverylasttime · 09/10/2010 05:43

DO NOT INDULGE NEGATIVE THOUGHTS.
Force yourself to be positive and practical just for the next few hours. Do what you really have to do. This need not ruin your weekend away. I bet you have pulled yourself together quickly after a heavy night before and it would be a real shame to let it spoil your time away.

I think you are going to Fr and Sw for 4 days, aren't you? Don't drink for those 4 days. Remember how you feel now and decide with your dp/dh not to drink whilst you are away. And then it gets easier.

Fortheverylasttime · 09/10/2010 05:44

4pm!!!!!!!!!!!!

I thought you were leaving in hours or something. That's tons of time. Are you going back to bed?

Fortheverylasttime · 09/10/2010 05:45

Refused to let it be broadcast?

Fortheverylasttime · 09/10/2010 05:47

He just ignored all the panelists completely mocking him and carried on talking as if he was in a little bubble. I feel mean for not liking him because it feels like a sort of bullying but he is such a berk. How can he make a living out of this spoon lark?

Silver66 · 09/10/2010 05:56

Forthe - I am fine in my mental state - have just given myself a BIG reminder why I stopped in the first place - and my lovely and patient DP stayed out tonight so basically it was as case of 'I can so I will' . So fucking stupid but we've all been there. I think my major problem is that I need a nurse maid - no problem not drinking if I know I can't. Soon as I'm left to my own devices I drink - because I CAN and no-one will know .......except for the stink of stale booze and the bloodshot eyes - FFS

Silver66 · 09/10/2010 06:00

Uri Geller = complete weirdo - BUT all the shit he does is genuine - FFS he was Michael Jackson's best friend - and we think we've got problems......!

Fortheverylasttime · 09/10/2010 06:05

But what is so good about bending spoons? What use is that? It's not alchemy.

Silver66 · 09/10/2010 06:07

and when Noel watsit jumped out with the statue thing they gave to the celebs we set up - he went fucking balistic - ' do not mock my psychic abilities etc' - very very strange man - do you see how i have cleverly moved the conversation away from my drinking - I am very good at deflecting anything that might rock my little world...

Fortheverylasttime · 09/10/2010 06:11

He must be entirely used to people mocking his psychic abilities by now. Did your ex-h die of alcohol related illness, or am I confusing you with someone else?

Silver66 · 09/10/2010 06:14

No that's me - he died last year - got off a plane in Greece and basically (I think) went into alcoholic fits and died - bit complicated - the Greek death certificate said he died of a broken femur - you don't die from a broken bone at 37.......

Fortheverylasttime · 09/10/2010 06:22

Was he intoxicated with spirits?

Silver66 · 09/10/2010 06:24

and now I am in a position where I am taking his girlfriend to court as he had just inherited 150 thousand from his Dad and in a very bogus will (hand written from post office in his GF's handwriting and not his usual signature) to try and get a better settlement for my DD - in the will he left DD ten thousand and rest to his GF - and I KNOW that despite his alcoholism he would not have wanted that - he would have at least left half of the money for DD - he was ill not stupid....so things will be easier once that is sorted - whatever DD ends up with will be a bonus but I want to kill that cow -0 she has forged a will and is basically going to get away with it. Police won't investigate because, rightly, why should they spend the public's money on that. Can't afford to pay any more solicitors fees so just want it all to be over and sorted ... god good to get that off my chest - you still awake???Hmm

Silver66 · 09/10/2010 06:31

I don't know what happened in any detail - only what his brother has told me (who is BTW a very good Uncle to DD and a good freind to me) - it's all a bit of a mystery but in his GF's witness statement she said I earn £120 a week but I buy Paul his cigarettes and Vodka out of that so I basically deserve all his money for looking after him for the last 5 years....erm - he has one child who he loves to bits - despite his illness - don't you think she deserves some help........and why were you buying an alcoholic bottles of vodka - never thought of helping him into re-hab or anything....

Fortheverylasttime · 09/10/2010 06:32

How can she get away with it if it is forged? How can it be that the police don't investigate? That was how they caught Shipman, a forged will. If it were that easy people would be forging wills all over the place.

Fortheverylasttime · 09/10/2010 06:34

I thought that even the wills you can buy from whsmith were not watertight. Did he have a previous will? What does his brother make of the will business?

Fortheverylasttime · 09/10/2010 06:36

I am going back to bed now. Have a good time in France. Smile

Silver66 · 09/10/2010 06:41

have you gone Forthe - one more cup of tea then back to bed - next door neighbor reving up his motorbike - WTF is he up at this time - lovely man - feeding cat while we are away - but FFS it's 6.30 in th morning and a Saturday....Grin

Silver66 · 09/10/2010 06:46

Sleep well lovely. Thanks for letting me off-load - bed for me too - the will thing is all very wrong but if I can't prove it (which would cost thousands for hand writing experts etc) there's not much I can do....hey ... for the next few days at least I WILL NOT BE DRINKING xxxx

Fortheverylasttime · 09/10/2010 06:51

Silver, we will leave it for now, but I think you have been badly advised. The probate courts do not like these whsmith wills and you can contest it on a no win no fee basis. I am not a lawyer but you need to take advice on this. To be continued...

ChristianaTheSeventh · 09/10/2010 07:11

Morning everyone

Silver and Lasttime hope you are asleep!

All OK, DD slept a bit better, came into my bed at 2.30am and woke me up again after 6am by spilling entire full enormous glass of water all over my bedside table...

Dark here.... When will I get used to winter

DH back tomorrow night

RageAgainstTheTeen · 09/10/2010 08:49

Right night one under my belt,it gets easier from now eh

Hope you have a lovely time in France silver Smile

jesuswhatnext · 09/10/2010 09:38

morning!! thats really good rage!, dont think about tomorrow, or next week or christmas, just concentrate on today!, try and enjoy your day, do something usful, something fun, something that works your brain a bit - the day will fly by and before you know it, its bedtime and your sober! Smile (no, its not always that easy, but drinking wont make a shit day any better!)

i have had a 'wonderful' reminder of what getting pissed is like, dh has, in between snoring like a fucking warthog,been puking his bleedin guts up all bloody night! this morning he has gone of to his art class looking and feeling like deep fried dog shit! Grin, ha ha!, serves the drunken git right!, he was right bloody annoying last night and i feel terribly self-rightgous and very sanctimouninous, i think he hated my smug, cats bum mouth face this morning! Grin (i may not be able to spell those words but i can bloody feel them! Grin)

hippychicky · 09/10/2010 09:40

Morning all. Not sure if you are already up and away silver but make sure you don't spoil you trip by beating yourself up about last night - that's only going to make you feel worse and you need to feel good about yourself now. Have a fab time!

Just a few thoughts for luci and looking and anyone else who doesn't know who they are any more when they are not the 'party girl/boy drinker' and who is feeling sad that that person has gone

  • Even when we make changes in our lives for the better, there is loss. Our identity is made up from how we see ourselves and how others see us, and how we see ourselves in the future. If any major change happens, negative or positive ( divorce, moving house, having a baby, giving up alcohol, partner giving up alcohol)then what's called our assumptive world dissappears.

When that happens we experience the feelings of bereavement and loss - just the same as if someone has died. Some of the losses are tangible - loss of friends, loss of status - but also there is loss of identity - who are you? were do you belong? What does your future hold?

We have to work through those feelings, in the same was as if someone died, to come to a point where we attain a new identity.

What you are feeling now is part of that process, you are grieving for the old you, now matter how much you disliked parts of yourself and your life, it was who you were. Feeling sad, angry, lost, is all part of the process. By being able to experience those things you will eventually settle on a new identity and a new assumptive world.

This is a very long post for a Saturday morning - apologies to those with sleepy heads on! Later in the day it is much harder for me to get on the computer as I have to fight my way past 2 teenagers.

Silver66 · 09/10/2010 09:40

Blush Blush Blush

shit x

hippychicky · 09/10/2010 09:42

Hi silver - you OK?
x

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