Female perspective required (again)

[EngineeringMike]

I posted on this before, about my long term partner, but things have changed slightly and I'd still like to hear some thoughts

My DP and I moved in together 3 years ago, in a new town for work, where we didn't know anyone. Almost straight away, her father died and things were very sad. Neither of us were happy in our jobs or in our relationship (the sex died, we argued, etc), and we split up.

Now, in the mean time, I saw a few other women, but my (at the time XP) wanted me back, and with few friends of her own wanted me to visit, and I did. This meant stopping dating other women. The problem was that we're in limbo.

I thought to help me make a decision, we would go away for a week. We had a great week and got on really well, and if I'm honest, I do love her. But in the back of my mind I'm thinking of the adage that one shouldn't go back. On the other hand, I'm not really going forward.

I want to resolve this for both our sakes. I'm sick of this limbo. Am I just scared of commitment, or is it wrong to go back once you've split up? Or were they exceptional circumstances?

"I've had a pretty happy life so far, but I'd always be interested in additional insights into behaviours and relationships..."

yep, writing a novel, or at the very least, a shite "article" for the Sunday Mail or summat

buuuuuuuuuuuuuusted

LOL! its another boxroom.

This is hilarious
What a twit.
(I stand by every word I wrote btw!)

me too, gretl, especially where I called him a borderline abuser

He's a man in his late 40s with a receding hairline, living on his own in a house he inherited from his parents, in Pinner :(

Brilliant! And DOH!

LadyBiscuit I expect his parents are still living there iyswim.

OMG - so this is the same person who started the Muslim prayers thread!

it's kinda cruel to laugh, really

< changes wet knickers >

link please duelingfanjo?

his parents have been stuffed and placed lovingly in the attic

I wonder if that spate of threads from men about their relationships a few weeks ago was connected to all this?

the Musilm thread

I bet he's into am-dram and fancies himself as an artiste...do you think he's the same guy as the sex-toy-up-the-arse while he clenches away at the laptop "working from home"? Does anybody remember him?

What a dick. I, having read only half of the posts, had been wondering on and off all day how to tell Mickey he's just not that into her and to do the decent thing (from a manly perspective like, because I'm a man).

LadyBiscuit lay off the receding hairlines - we can't help the male pattern baldness, doesn't mean we're all weirdos who want to wind up Mumsnetters!

I bet he's got no friends and does that slashfic thing.

That Muslim thread really didn't bring out the best in people, did it? I feel like he's lurking around every corner now (dons tinfoil hat and retapes newspaper over all the windows). However he does have a very individual style which should make him easier to spot ongoing, unless he adopts some kind of cockernee sparrer thing, or starts typing with his toes.

I remember a sex-toy-up-the-arse thread but I couldn't say whether it was the same sex-toy-up-the-arse thread. Have there been many?

Damn! Just as I came across the perfect article to refer ''Mike'' to.

Well, just in case you're still looking ''Mike'', check out Shane Watson's column from the Sunday Times Style mag.

Peter Pan syndrome is what is troubling you...apparently it has afflicted Chris Moyles too, maybe you wanna have a chat with him in preparation for your book/article.

I remember that sex-toy-up-the-arse thread

oh no, it wasn't a thread...

< gets coat >

Chris Moyles is mainly afflicted by being a colossal wanker with an ego inversely proportional in size to his cock.

(I expect.)

Sound familiar?

Peter Pan syndrome ?

pray tell...

Moyles dumped his GF of 8 yrs because he was ''not ready to settle down''

The article starts:

If you are a woman, post 30, in a LTR and you think he's the One, and you're assuming that he feels the same way...then prepare to be scared.

You can see why I was so excited to share the wisdom!

And the rest of the article really just pulls together all the things that were said to ''Mike'' viz the man calling the shots re marriage/children til he is good and ready. Or not.

SW calls it ''extended adolesence''.
I am going to use this in response to ''Mike's'' next thread...