Trinity, hello.
I really know what you are going thoruhg because, after approaching AA for the first time, I had a year of what you're now going through. Still, I got off lightly - I know people who took ten years to get it!
Do yourself a favour - forget the risk of poverty, incarceration, insanity and death; forget about the risk of social services getting further involved in your life; just imagine a whole year of the nightmare you are currently living through. Stopping drinking; feeling shit; getting better; thinking you can drink again; drinking again; being unable to stop until you feel shit again and things you don't want to happen have happened; stopping drinking again. Imagine how that is going to drag you down, physically, mentally, emotionally. Imagine what this winter is going to be like.
I can assure you that, if you get away with only a year of it, you will be one of the lucky ones, because this is not going to fix itself. If you want the madness to end, you need to stop drinking, and then you need to make a daily effort to stay stopped.
The good news is that, if I can do it, anyone can do it, and there is no magic trick or special attribute that you need to make this happen.
If not, I will do my best to be around for the next year, any time you need help, and so, I'm sure, will everyone else.