💀 Archers thread #132: The Grim Reaper joined the cast; The Bard of Ambridge breathed his last. Discuss The Archers here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed. We don't all agree on all points and most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you think Shula will make an excellent vicar, or other unusual things.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/4197199--The-Archers-spoilers-thread-6-Cant-wait-for-7-02pm-Join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed.

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Thanks to many of you for title suggestions. @JanglyBeads said that this thread had to be a Bert tribute so needed a rhyming title. From an excellent field, I chose the suggestion from @BorsetshireBanality (who also has a cracking username).

Check out the last thread for the other suggestions and various poetic offerings inspired by Bert Fry's passing. www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/4349822--Archers-thread-131-A-time-to-plant-a-time-to-reap-Discuss-The-Archers-here

So, who'll get the bungalow? Rex, Stella, Pip? If Rex has to move, will he doss down beside his pigs at Lower Loxley? Or will Rex be a resident at Her Majesty's pleasure, having bumped off Trevor for being the world's most boring man? Now Freddie's on the case, are Russ's days at LL numbered? Will we ever hear Jill again, or was Bert just the first of many older cast members to be dedded?

Over to you!

Except that Hazel is actively malicious; Lynda is a complete PITA, but capable of perceptiveness and kindness.

Active malice that inconveniences that godawful little pillock Tom Archer must be a Good Thing, although Hazel is an even more poorly conceived character than the Snell-beast. Her reappearance honks of 'we're a bit stuck for ideas, what do we do now?'
At least they resisted the siren lure of another yoghurt sprayage/spillage. Small mercies, eh?

Dunno what T&N are making such a fuss about. Bridge Farm isn’t exactly rammed with people …

Where else? Only two + Ruby at the Dower House.

The Bungalow might soon be empty.

Glebe Cottage only has a phantom tenant.

If Home Farm House comes back into play, then maybe Willow Cottage might be free.

And we know how much Tom loves Joy. She has a big empty house …

I asked a while back but everyone ignored me- who is living in Cutardgate Cottage these days?

I predict Hazel will take a header down those steep stairs.

Here’s a page from The Ambridge Reporrter, KimikosNightmare:

ambridgereporter.org.uk/Blossom_Hill_Cottage_History.html

@KimikosNightmare
who is living in Cutardgate Cottage these days?

Who indeed? I suspect the ghost of Urshula lingers. Clad in black, sitting in her creaky wooden rocking chair.Endlessly rocking back and forth.

Creak, creak...

No, Bore that's not rocking you hear. It's a gentle squeak as the shade of Urshula ceaselessly scrubs at her son's blood and shit, engrained in the floorboards.

You're probably right 23.
Accompanied by rhythmic denture-clacking

I did enjoy the Hazel part of tonight's episode. Hazel is appalling but not as appalling as Gnasher and Tom.

But as for the Bridge Farm Christmas card nonsense- why? Just why?

@echt

I predict Hazel will take a header down those steep stairs.

especially if Kate greases the steps with some of her lentil stew!

How much money do we think Hazel has actually got?

Her evicting tenants in order to have a temporary “bolthole” was frighteningly realistic!

But as for the Bridge Farm Christmas card nonsense- why? Just why?

A group picture of J, K and S in hairnets won’t make a very festive Christmas card. Nor would one of Susan wrestling a yoghurt pipe. Possibly they could be used in a Bridge Farm calendar, which would require 12 shots, but not for a last-minute card. If the shoot was taking place in May/June, I might have forgiven this scene but it’s pointless as a countdown to Christmas SL. Sigh…

I did enjoy hearing Tom and Natasha being evicted, however. Only because I love hating Natasha and not because I like people being made homeless. I’m afraid if Hazel wants her flat back, that’s her prerogative. They are both earning and don’t live in central London so it must be time for them to buy or build.

but hazel has to give 2 months notice... or it would be an illegal eviction. t&n are 'safe' until mid feb.

www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2021/dec/07/charlotte-higgins-on-the-archers-its-party-time-in-the-cider-shed

A not very up to date round up.

@purplesequins

but hazel has to give 2 months notice... or it would be an illegal eviction. t&n are 'safe' until mid feb.

Hazel gave verbal notice in the ep.

I've had this happen twice to me in Australia , where many laws, etc. are near-identical to those in the UK.

One knows it is the case, but it's still a shocker when it happens.

Hazel gave verbal notice in the ep

I think she handed them a letter at the same time. She doesn’t seem the sort to leave any thread untied. T and N are hardly going to end up in the hide with Blake. I wouldn’t worry about them - they will sort themselves out.

Title suggestion: Evictions (Tom and Tash), depictions (Bridge Farm Christmas card), convictions (Philip) and addictions (Alice) - what are our predictions for 2022 in Ambridge?

I like that, slight edit how about “Evictions (Tom and Tash), conniptions (entire cast and crew of the Mysteries), convictions (Philip) and addictions (Alice) - all sure to make this the Best Ambridge Christmas Evah”

I love the proposed title, LillianGish.

I've not bought into the idea that a wealthy lady like Hazel would choose to live above the village shop. Send her back to "Daddy's hotel"!

I'm still cross about Bert's funeral (and lack of village gathering).

Thanks all. Later today or early tomorrow for new thread, I think, at the current rate of posting.

@Madcats

I love the proposed title, LillianGish.

I've not bought into the idea that a wealthy lady like Hazel would choose to live above the village shop. Send her back to "Daddy's hotel"!

I'm still cross about Bert's funeral (and lack of village gathering).

But she's not even planning to live there after her house is finished, just have it as a bolt hole. I did like her being deliciously horrid. And she did mention the law about this, accurately I think (not going to listen again).

Of course she might have lying about the house.

@Madcats

I love the proposed title, LillianGish.

I've not bought into the idea that a wealthy lady like Hazel would choose to live above the village shop. Send her back to "Daddy's hotel"!

I'm still cross about Bert's funeral (and lack of village gathering).

I suspect she's not as well off as she's making out and will be trying to get Daddy's money off Peggy.

Agree it's a great title.

I didn't hear last night's episode to be fair but in the 2021 reboot of Hazel Woolley what terrible things has she actually done? She owns a flat that she would like to have back for her own occasional use and is following due legal process for the eviction; and has suggested Jack Woolley's name is recognized somewhere by the rewilding project. ,(Though I do recognize that second home owners are viewed as evil in certain quarters).
I am still irritated by listening to a week of Lynda hence my partiality at the moment to any character who isn't Lynda.
On a different note, why didn't Helen and Tom buy their own properties, for investment purposes if nothing else, when they made that money selling off the land?

@ButtonSister

I didn't hear last night's episode to be fair but in the 2021 reboot of Hazel Woolley what terrible things has she actually done? She owns a flat that she would like to have back for her own occasional use and is following due legal process for the eviction; and has suggested Jack Woolley's name is recognized somewhere by the rewilding project. ,(Though I do recognize that second home owners are viewed as evil in certain quarters). I am still irritated by listening to a week of Lynda hence my partiality at the moment to any character who isn't Lynda. On a different note, why didn't Helen and Tom buy their own properties, for investment purposes if nothing else, when they made that money selling off the land?

It's the insincere, frail, poorly voice going on about Daddy and how Ambridge is the only place she was ever happy that makes me think she is lying and has some dastardly plan up her sleeve. I think that is what we are supposed to think.