💀 Archers thread #132: The Grim Reaper joined the cast; The Bard of Ambridge breathed his last. Discuss The Archers here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed. We don't all agree on all points and most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you think Shula will make an excellent vicar, or other unusual things.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/4197199--The-Archers-spoilers-thread-6-Cant-wait-for-7-02pm-Join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed.

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Thanks to many of you for title suggestions. @JanglyBeads said that this thread had to be a Bert tribute so needed a rhyming title. From an excellent field, I chose the suggestion from @BorsetshireBanality (who also has a cracking username).

Check out the last thread for the other suggestions and various poetic offerings inspired by Bert Fry's passing. www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/4349822--Archers-thread-131-A-time-to-plant-a-time-to-reap-Discuss-The-Archers-here

So, who'll get the bungalow? Rex, Stella, Pip? If Rex has to move, will he doss down beside his pigs at Lower Loxley? Or will Rex be a resident at Her Majesty's pleasure, having bumped off Trevor for being the world's most boring man? Now Freddie's on the case, are Russ's days at LL numbered? Will we ever hear Jill again, or was Bert just the first of many older cast members to be dedded?

Over to you!

It's all daft at the moment.

Gnasher is pure poison.

Bert died on 25th October, and the funeral was on 4th December. So that's just over six weeks from death to burial.

My mother died earlier this year and the funeral took place almost a month later. We could have opted for an even later funeral, and indeed had we wanted to insist on around 10 or 11 a.m. we would have had to wait at least two more weeks.

Bert is presumably having a church funeral, which may make the waiting time even longer. At least a crematoria you're not fighting for space in amongst weddings and christenings.

It's usually the crematorium that has the pressure on availability Platax. That was certainly the case when my DM died. Church was less of a problem. They don't do so many weddings or christenings these days and the latter are usually part of the main service.

6 weeks does seem a bit excessive for Bert though. I thought it had been ages ago - or did the SWs just forget?

Totally agree that it is ludicrous that it's only on 5th December that the Bridge Farm team even start talking about ordering Christmas gifts and, even more stupidly, idly wonder about designing a Christmas card from scratch. Does nobody on the production team have any common sense, never mind any experience of working in an office or business?

Is Hazel going to turf Tom and Natasha out of the flat and take up residence there herself? I don't believe in this change of heart at all.

What's that stuff about rent on the new unit for Summer Orchard? Wouldn't it be the norm to negotiate a rent-free period?

or maybe it's because the family wanted a weekend service?

I wondered whether, finding herself in reduced circumstances, Hazel is about to offer T&N the opportunity to buy the flat.

(Though outchucking is more her style. Or doubling the rent …)

and for christmas cards & give-aways - in any company I worked for planning started in january with most orders around september time. customised items produced even earlier (photo shoot prime time was may).

(Presumably, with her dodgy health, she wouldn’t want an upstairs flat - unless a lift could be installed?)

Thread title, something about the writers' Woolley thinking and plotting? 🤔

@ButtonSister,

Nice, ButtonSister!

Very nice.

@Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g

Totally agree that it is ludicrous that it's only on 5th December that the Bridge Farm team even start talking about ordering Christmas gifts and, even more stupidly, idly wonder about designing a Christmas card from scratch. Does nobody on the production team have any common sense, never mind any experience of working in an office or business?

Is Hazel going to turf Tom and Natasha out of the flat and take up residence there herself? I don't believe in this change of heart at all.

Ian might start thinking about the Christmas menu at Grey Gables soon.

Bit early for that, Captain. Best to wait till 25th December and see what the suppliers have in stock.

Woolley thinking is a great idea!

Oh my god! Most companies have already sent out their Christmas cards let alone thinking about designing one. Are they going to lovingly write them all out as well? I’m getting secondhand stress just thinking about it.

They only have seventeen customers for Bridge Fresh so it won't be an enormous labour.

also how bout “Wooley socks it to them”

Assuming Hazel has no "loved" ones, do we think she's going to go around touting a huge inheritance and bending people to her will with it for the next few years?

Oh no, is Hazel going to be a permanent fixture now, wanging on about ‘daddy’ to all and sundry? Don’t trust her at all.

And Natasha is deeply unpleasant and manipulative isn’t she? I don’t think she ever wanted her business to be on the farm so she sabotaged the idea, making Pat look like a baddie. The Bridge Farm Archers are woefully unprepared for someone like her and I love it.

Well the Bridge Farm Archers, treated Hayley and Kirsty badly,, so karma is biting back with Gnasher!

…not to mention Sharon

so she sabotaged the idea, making Pat look like a baddie
Pat has no one to blame but herself. It was she who let slip that the ghastly bunch had been discussing moving Summer Orchard to Bridge Farm without reference to Natasha and that they saw the move as a done deal. I think most people would have been just a teeny bit awkward in the circs.
Mind you, Natasha must have designs on the farm as a whole; nothing else could explain staying married to the pathetic Tomtit.

Last minute Christmas arrangements are a standard soap trope. I gave up on Corrie some time ago, but it was always a source of wonder the way they all invited each other round for Christmas a couple of days beforehand and had no trouble with catering.

Having listened to the omnibus today and endured Lynda in full directorial onslaught give me Hazel any day.