Call #111 for Archers advice: Is Hilda breathing? Should Joy be breathing? Could Nelson Gabriel be in cryogenic suspension? Discuss The Archers here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed. We don't all agree on all points and most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you'd like to be Joy's best friend or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please. We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3439443-keep-it-to-yourself-the-archers-spoilers-thread-4, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Thanks for all the input on title suggestions. I'd missed the significance of 111, but @R4 and DDD, our resident numerologist, were right on to it. Strongly tempted by Bore's suggestion but couldn't resist the chance to mention my favourite ever Archers character, Nelson Gabriel. Have not managed to incorporate a cricket reference, so you'll have to read up on that for yourselves. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nelson_(cricket)

I wonder if this thread will last till Joe's funeral.

Calling her, or anyone a ‘rancid little bitch’ seems deeply unpleasant

Not sure whether you are trying to police my language or my opinions. I am happy with my choice of descriptors for your sister's daughter Given your chosen board name I doubt we are going to see eye to eye on the RLB.

She has been brought up to consider herself outstandingly clever, at the expense of her brother's confidence and encouraged to be smug and vain. Remember her boasting of the number of friends she had and her incredible maturity? She's someone who needed mud flicking at them regularly and the occasional reminder that her shit also stinks.

And recently this charming young -floozie- damoozle seemed only to realise that Mrs Russ was a person in her own right when she discovered her to be relatively young as opposed to some tedious non-person in her forties whom she, the RLB, had a positive right to supplant without a second thought.

Even more recently, she has had the blistering hypocrisy to suggest with horror that Bella might even have taken the faceless man (shades of the Duchess of Argyll?) home with her that night. And that's really shocking behaviour, is it, Lily? For all your supposed brains, you lack the critical thinking skills to see that your own relationship is equally dubious.

Mind you, with a mother who pounced on an employee and the husband of a friend simply to verify that her nethers hadn't completely atrophied, I suppose once can't expect much from dear little Lily. (Roy is of course a slimeball - I'm not exclusively blaming the woman: sorry to disappoint)

That's actually quite a fair summing up of Lily.

Lily likes being a big fish in a little pond where everyone goes on about how clever and talented she is. And she managed to capture the sophisticated older man.

She then went to uni, Small fish, teeny, tiny fish- big pond. Failed miserably and ran home to mummy. And lied about why.The glamour is rapidly falling from CMR- he's an unemployed loser whose wife couldn't care less.

Lily is now big fish again- swanning around "helping" to run LL (aren't there employees to do that?) and being queen bee at the call centre.

Even Heather wasn’t (Isn’t) a RLB.

Apols - has to consult my amazing hand drawn archer family tree my late ma and I did a few years ago - I meant Hazel !!

I meant Hazel Was wondering what Heatherpet could possibly have done to upset you.

Even as I typed it I heard erroneous north east accent !

In fact Call Me Russ were Mr Jones’ words to Freddie in his office at the college where he was deputy head and shagging Freddie’s twin. It was some weeks before Mr Jones had the utter joy of meeting the rest of the family.

@Motoko I think in days of yore people spoke so little about sexual matters few people would know whether older couples of their acquaintance were at it every night or not.

OMG - so that’s what Joy is!!!

what? what have I missed?

Nothing concrete - but my 🔮 is certain Joy will turn into a totally terrifying stalker.

(And not for the first time ...)

what? what have I missed?
High on a hill was a lonely goatherd
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
Loud was the voice of the lonely goatherd
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

There's even a line about "Men drinking beer cider with the foam afloat heard ..."

Excited for the first time eva about TA or so it seems - currently listening to the 15 min serial. Harrowing but good. Now I can hear TA.

Alf has gone - yay!

Joy - a stalker?

How did you reach that conclusion, SSD?

I must be missing something

A stalker of Tony. Who will attempt to lay waste to his family.

Didn’t you hear how often she called him lovely?

And (another OMG - sorry!) the MG. She got it deliberately to reel him in. And she had it break down so he would offer to work on it. And ... and ... and ...

I fear something rather worse - that Lynda Snell is stepping back not merely from the Xmas show but audible Ambridge life in general. And that Joy has been drafter in to fill the resulting vacancy for 'irritating outsider with distinctive voice who turns out to be a Good Egg under the irritatingness'.

errol not Lindy ! Say it ain’t so !

Do you know what, Errol, I think you might be on to something there....☹

Steady now SurpriseSpar.

... You wait ...

Yeah, Carol Boyd aka Lynda hasn’t been on for a while. I hope she’s okay.

I'm here - can do new thread in an hour or so when we've caught up with David Attenborough. Hold on and don't get in a posting frenzy!

Alf has gone, but he was trying to do what he has done twice before and leave suddenly without saying goodbye to anyone.

What has he taken with him, and who did it belong to before he packed those bags?

Alf's comedy pirate accent is even more annoying than Joy's dim Northerner.