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Primary education

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Original poster

I'm too ill to take DD to school and now DH is unwell too -- can we just keep DD home for a day or two?

327 replies

SongsOfSongs · 02/03/2026 00:27

I have COVID or the flu or something and I have been absolutely floored with fever, congestion, racing heart, etc. since Friday. I've camped out in the bedroom all weekend while DH took care of the children. Now, he says he's got it too. For me, it came on very strongly, so I worry that by the morning he is going to be very unwell. If he is, can we just keep DD home for the day? She's in Y5.

Ideas I've considered that won't work: We live a bit far from the school so no other families near us that I know of. No good enough friends that I would ask this of them either. It's tube + walking and I don't feel comfortable sending her on her own. I have an older DD but their schools are in opposite directions, so she couldn't make the primary drop and then get to her school in time and would get detention. Don't think I'd feel comfortable sending her in a taxi. Is there anything else I'm missing? Hopefully it'd just be a day - maybe two - before I was well enough to take her.

Never had one of us become ill before the other was better before!

OP posts:
Boilingfrogatprimaryschool · 02/03/2026 00:39

If it were me. as long as she doesn't already have a lot of days off sick, I'd just call in sick for her. She is probably a carrier at least anyway.

ScoutOfTheSoftHeartsClub · 02/03/2026 03:06

Your elder daughter would not get a detention if you explain the circumstances to her school.

So, unless you think it’s likely that one or both of them is infectious, I would do that. It’s important that children grow up learning how to pull together in difficult times.

I do sympathise though. Hope you’ll recover soon.

THisbackwithavengeance · 02/03/2026 03:51

Are you both genuinely that ill that you can’t muster up a bit of energy to drop her off? I mean there’s ill and then ill isn't there?

beigeandcream · 02/03/2026 03:52

Where I work she would get unauthorised marks

drdee · 02/03/2026 05:32

If I were you, I’d try calling a taxi and taking her to school- if both parents are ill, it’s not easy having the child at home either. They need attention and you need to rest until she comes back from school. Hope you get well soon!

3luckystars · 02/03/2026 05:35

This is a crazy system. It’s a day off and you are all sick. What will actually happen if you call the school and say the whole
family is sick and your daughter won’t be in?

Bringemout · 02/03/2026 05:52

Take a cab and one of you drop her off and the other one can pick her up.

99bottlesofkombucha · 02/03/2026 05:55

THisbackwithavengeance · 02/03/2026 03:51

Are you both genuinely that ill that you can’t muster up a bit of energy to drop her off? I mean there’s ill and then ill isn't there?

Yes there is, and I believe she’s conveyed that she’s ill

AmandaBrotzman · 02/03/2026 06:08

You have to take her. I appreciate the flu is fucking horrible but someone has to get her to school. Send older DD with her in a taxi and the taxi then take her to school after?

tirednessbecomesme · 02/03/2026 06:12

Taxi for eldest to take youngest and then eldest on to school

TheChosenTwo · 02/03/2026 06:19

beigeandcream · 02/03/2026 03:52

Where I work she would get unauthorised marks

I would not be remotely concerned about this.
OP I think I’d also book a taxi for them; drop youngest first and then oldest. Call older ones school and let them know why she’s going to be in late.
Hope you turn a corner soon and start to feel better 💐

InboxOverload · 02/03/2026 06:19

Bringemout · 02/03/2026 05:52

Take a cab and one of you drop her off and the other one can pick her up.

Great idea. Pass the virus on to the cab driver.

InboxOverload · 02/03/2026 06:21

Call the school. Tell them she won’t be in because you and your husband are too ill to take her. Ask them to send work for her to do at home.

InboxOverload · 02/03/2026 06:21

TheChosenTwo · 02/03/2026 06:19

I would not be remotely concerned about this.
OP I think I’d also book a taxi for them; drop youngest first and then oldest. Call older ones school and let them know why she’s going to be in late.
Hope you turn a corner soon and start to feel better 💐

Show quote history

Sound expensive and not a plan everyone could manage.

Brewtiful · 02/03/2026 06:23

InboxOverload · 02/03/2026 06:21

Call the school. Tell them she won’t be in because you and your husband are too ill to take her. Ask them to send work for her to do at home.

Please don't ask school to send work.

Just phone and let them know she won't be in. If you don't have anyone to take her and you're both too unwell then one day off unauthorised in the grand scheme of things really doesn't matter.

She's old enough to look after herself sufficiently and hopefully by tomorrow one of you is feeling well enough to take her in.

PollyBell · 02/03/2026 06:23

InboxOverload · 02/03/2026 06:21

Call the school. Tell them she won’t be in because you and your husband are too ill to take her. Ask them to send work for her to do at home.

Teachers are not parents secretary's

MJagain · 02/03/2026 06:26

ScoutOfTheSoftHeartsClub · 02/03/2026 03:06

Your elder daughter would not get a detention if you explain the circumstances to her school.

So, unless you think it’s likely that one or both of them is infectious, I would do that. It’s important that children grow up learning how to pull together in difficult times.

I do sympathise though. Hope you’ll recover soon.

This. Phone her school.

or send them early to primary and Y5 can go to breakfast club or a local friends house?

TBH this is one of many reasons people should attend primary school within walking distance

Fridgetapas · 02/03/2026 06:27

Sorry but it’s just one of those things which you have to suck it up and take her in. It’s horrible when you feel so rotten but as a parent sometimes you’ve just got to get on with it. At least after you can have most of the day in peace.
And the suggestion someone gave about asking for work sent home…. There’s no way any school is sending work home to a perfectly well child if their parents are ill at home. Ill as in hospital ill or serious long term ill is different but not so much for the flu.

brunetteorblonde · 02/03/2026 06:28

I wouldn't worry about an unauthorised absence but if both parents are too unwell to get her to school, I think she would be better of at school rather than with the 2 unwell parents. At that age, I really dont see why she couldnt go in a taxi, you could request a female driver but otherwise the older sibling could take her in a taxi, is there a breakfast club so that the older one wouldn't be late?

ConfusedWriter08 · 02/03/2026 06:28

I had this once (I have Crohn’s Disease and literally couldn’t leave the bathroom), called school and explained and they sent a staff member from breakfast club to my house to walk him to school, albeit after breakfast club had finished. We do live in walking distance though, but it was very much appreciated from my point of view.

coldinearlyspring · 02/03/2026 06:32

I’d get a taxi. I think if you’re both this ill she’s safer at school.

InboxOverload · 02/03/2026 06:33

I’m a teacher. I’d happily take 2 minutes to send a couple of worksheets and a short message at some point during the day. Teachers who wouldn’t be happy to, or don’t have the time, don’t have to. Easy enough. It’s helpful if a child can crack on with some work they’d otherwise be missing out on.

Morepositivemum · 02/03/2026 06:35

I think it’ll be easier on you both to get better if she’s not around. You don’t know yet how bad your dh is, he might be able to get her in

Overthebow · 02/03/2026 06:40

Whoever’s the least unwell does the school run, unless you’re both completely unable to get up in which case you need to call for help as you can’t look after a primary age DC like that.

InboxOverload · 02/03/2026 06:42

Fridgetapas · 02/03/2026 06:27

Sorry but it’s just one of those things which you have to suck it up and take her in. It’s horrible when you feel so rotten but as a parent sometimes you’ve just got to get on with it. At least after you can have most of the day in peace.
And the suggestion someone gave about asking for work sent home…. There’s no way any school is sending work home to a perfectly well child if their parents are ill at home. Ill as in hospital ill or serious long term ill is different but not so much for the flu.

Flu can be incapacitating. It sounds like they’d have to get on a train which would mean spreading the virus. If you haven’t eaten properly for days, you might pass out on the train. Is that safe? If driving, even less so.

The school don’t have to send work but they could, and I have before. It can be as simple as - Read your book, practise spellings, write X. Here’s a maths sheet. It would take less than 2 mins. I’d rather a child was at school, but if parents were genuinely too ill to bring their child to school and didn’t have another option, that’d be fine.

I wouldn’t want to send my children on their own in a taxi. Some people wouldn’t be able to afford this option.