I think I might be pregnant. Fuck.

[Jayable]

And I'm panicking. I haven't taken a test yet because honestly I don't know what the fuck to do if I am and I'm freaking out a little.

Me and DH are going through a bit of a rough patch at the minute. I know, because he's told me...multiple times... that he definitely does not want anymore DC (we already have one son).

Admittedly I've been a bit lax with contraception since our son was born (2 years ago) because frankly I hate hormonal contraception, it messes with my body, bleeding constantly, migraines, mood swings etc. So instead we have done a mix of using condoms or just tracking my cycles and using nothing if its supposed to be a "safe" time. Stupidly I didn't think it was a massive issue because to be honest we barely have sex these days.

Anyway now I'm sat here with really painful boobs, over a week late and having had a tiny bit of brown spotting 4 days ago and nothing else.

Our house is too small, we don't have the money, my husband doesn't want another child and I'm not even sure if we'll be together much longer but I still find the idea of getting rid of a hypothetical pregnancy difficult because I'm really honest with myself I do want another child at some point and have only reluctantly accepted not doing so because of DH.

I'm so scared to find out for sure. I don't even know why I've posted in aibu but is anyone around who's been through this or who can just talk to me!!

go and buy a test. The sooner you know for sure, the sooner you can decide what you are going to do. Also, if you tear negative, you can stop worrying.

You don’t need to tell your DH where you’re going or what you’re buying. Do the test away from home so you can find out the result on your own, in case you need time to do some thinking on your own.

I’m sorry you’re in this dilemma, but would say that you must do what you want and not feel coerced. If you terminate against your will, your marriage is over and if you don’t, it may also be over. So unfortunately for you, either way it doesn’t look great for your marriage, so do what you need for yourself in terms of the pregnancy. Good luck

You need to do a test OP. There's no point worrying until you know for sure. If it comes back positive you need to have a serious think as to what you want. I don't think our opinion matters on this. Best of luck 🙂

Take the test. If it's negative I'd still be taking a long look at your relationship.

Handhold OP.
Take the bull by the horns (so to speak) and pee on that stick. x

Second doing the test. It’s far better to know so you can properly consider all the options rather than worry about possibly hypothetical ones.

Get the test. It might be negative.

If it's positive, deal with it then. It takes 2 to make a baby. I didn't get on with hormonal contracteptives either. If you want the baby, have it.

Oh yes I definitely am. Things aren't great at the moment.

I'll try and nip to tesco this evening and just bite the bullet.

I've been there OP. Marriage going down the pan, DC1 months old. Dtd once. On the pill. Breastfeeding. Got pregnant. Didn't realise for ages. Months. Had the baby, ditched the husband. Its been hard. Still us if I'm honest. But it's great.

I just don't know how I'd afford it

At least then you'll know.

If you're not, and he's adamant he doesn't want more children, will he consider the snip?

If you choose to stay together, you'll need to have a conversation around this anyway because even if you're not pregnant now, at some point there's a high chance of an unplanned pregnancy without contraception and he needs to understand how you feel about that.

No point worrying about it until you know for sure what the situation is so I would go get a test as soon as possible.

You can't decide anything yet,take the test and one step at a time x

Go buy a test, if you are and a affordably have it yourself do it

Please take a test so you know where you stand. I imagine it is a horrible and lonely place to be right now. Especially with such a rocky relationship.
Sending hugs x

Do a test. If it's positive, get the abortion pill. Don't tell your husband.

Until you know if you’re pregnant or not, there’s not much you can do. It must be very stressful for you.

I echo everyone else and say buy a test so you know for sure.

If you are, you split and want to keep the baby you will get benefits for 2 children, child benefits, universal credit and your partner will have to pay maintenance for both children.

Things don't need to cost much, free sites, charity shops, car boots, Facebook, borrowing from friends. My dds only really started getting expensive when they got to secondary school.

That's really shit advice.

Gosh this was me two years ago. I actually posted my own thread panicking and asking for a handhold whilst I tested.

I was shitting myself. Flat was far too small. Relationship wasn't in the best shape. I had some health problems. DH was clear that he didn't want any more children.

It was positive. Cue huge panic. DH moping around for two weeks. I reluctantly booked a consultation with Marie Stopes to discuss a termination, to be honest I don't think I'd have gone through with it regardless.

The day before the appointment DH says he wants us to keep the baby.

Fast forward to now and that baby is a rambunctious 20 month old and the apple of DH's eye. We're muddling on, relationship wise, but neither of us regret having DS (#3)

We have a bigger home, finances are better.. things are OK.

I hope you get the result you want OP x

Test first then make any decisions that may be needed.

@CurlewKate WTF?!

You need to do the test. I know it's scary, but knowledge is power. Plus you might not even be and you could be stressing over nothing.
I'm sorry things are tough at the minute. We are all here to listen to you.

Do a test?