AIBU for expecting a surgical abortion?

[Georgeoftheinternet]

Due to this virus I will have to terminate my pregnancy at home. This scares me because I don’t want the whole process and flushing everything down the toilet, plus bleeding for weeks. 3/100 don’t fully terminate.

Apologies if you are struggling to get pregnant. Everyone’s lives are different.

I don't think they do surgical ones unless you're past the point of a medical one, though I could be wrong about that.

If you're early enough for a medical abortion then they wouldn't normally offer you a surgical abortion anyway.
I don't want to be crass so I apologise, but at that stage is similar to a very heavy period. And you're right, there are risks but they are minimal and you will be ok if you need further treatment.

It sounds difficult for you and I wouldn't like to be in the situation, but if you're at the stage where a medical termination is feasible, it has a far lower risk profile for you than a surgical procedure.

I know someone who had a surgical one a few weeks back. Are you sure you can’t?

Surgical evacs for miscarriage and terminations are not being routinely offered due to the increased risk to staff in theatre. Your hospital may give you the option of a MVA which could suit you better, just enquire. Unfortunately you are choosing to have this procedure so you need to go along with the safest option for the staff caring for you.

@Bluetonic41 what is MVA?

@Fabpinky unless it’s medically necessary they won’t do it. Unless you are past a certain time as well.

Having suffered several miscarriages, two of which being ‘missed’ meaning I had to go home and take the Misoprostol - never had a choice, and then had to deal with what you’ve described. I think you need go home and crack on with it.

If it doesnt work you’ll then be offered a D&C. These are expensive proceedures as they require an obstetric surgeon, anaesthetist, and theatre time. I think others in more need of these services probably need to be prioritised first above yourself do you not?

Its not pleasant, but then many things aren’t. Make sure you ideally have someone with you, take the painkillers and follow the instructions to the letter.

Manual vacuum aspiration, you are awake with entonox if required and a local anaesthetic to the cervix, takes about half an hour. Some units offer this.

@WhereverIGoddamnLike I have heard reports that it can be brutal. Also I’m not offered a scan, even though it was 100% “necessary” before and I’m sure prevented women from getting treatment before.

@Bluetonic41 I would have to be sedated.

@Chuggington2 hey lady I don’t like your tone.

NHS is there to provide a service, I’m asking for this service. It would have been offered before and if I choose to have a service why should my needs not be considered. It’s a very fast and quick procedure. Cost isn’t a factor.

Poor you op. Some latent aggression on this thread. Of course it’s women’s health that gets deorioritised.

@MitziK it’s less risky to have a surgical IMO because more chance of complete removal and not weeks of bleeding which it’s bad for someone with low iron like myself.
Plus mental trauma for me.

[quote Georgeoftheinternet]@Chuggington2 hey lady I don’t like your tone.

NHS is there to provide a service, I’m asking for this service. It would have been offered before and if I choose to have a service why should my needs not be considered. It’s a very fast and quick procedure. Cost isn’t a factor.[/quote]
Why is cost not a factor? Are you paying privately for it? If no, of course it’s a bloody factor

I had a MVA (manual vacuum aspiration) at six weeks. It's what they used to describe as a 'lunchtime abortion'. Really rather unpleasant, they do exactly what the name says, whilst you are awake. It's quick though, it's all over and done with in a couple of minutes.

If you do proceed with the pills, maybe buy a couple of packs of those Tena pants that you can wear for a few days. That way, you can take them off without inspecting the contents, just put them straight into a disposal bag. Are you able to reach the loo flush whilst still seated? Flushing before you stand up might be sensible too.

[quote Georgeoftheinternet]@Chuggington2 hey lady I don’t like your tone.

NHS is there to provide a service, I’m asking for this service. It would have been offered before and if I choose to have a service why should my needs not be considered. It’s a very fast and quick procedure. Cost isn’t a factor.[/quote]
If cost isn’t a factor then I expect there’s a private hospital that would offer this service

Hey @Georgeoftheinternet

Sorry to hear you're going through this. Why would you prefer a medical? There is a risk that it could cause complications later.

If you can chose to have the pill and go home, it's better for your body. It's painful, like a bad period. You don't see anything - just heavy bleeding. You can also have the pill abs chose to stay in hosp, they can give you pain relief.

Hope you're ok.

Sorry, I meant surgical*

Also, you don't bleed for weeks. It's not like after having a baby.

It's 2 days of heavy bleeding and a day of pain - like bad cramps.

I agree with you 100% just being honest years ago I had a very early medical abortion maybe 6 weeks and I bled for maybe 6 weeks before needing a d&c? I think being extremely anemic and unwell and still having positive pregnancy tests so I would fight hard for a surgical if I ever ended up in that situation again. Sorry you are going through this

@farfallarocks I have no support structure generally and going through something traumatic I also don’t have a support structure. I just what a surgical because I also don’t have the means to be ill at home with the side affects. I don’t have mental health support. I don’t have a high pain threshold. I’ve been sleeping and feeling sick when I’m awake. I’ve been unable to go to the gym. I’ve been unable to get mental health referrals.
I’ve been unable to get anything apart from a guy shoot his load inside me when I was in my bipolar manic state.

Can’t wait to have a self administrated abortion whilst my housemate who wants me to keep the baby knows what I’m doing.

Such fab fucking great news.

I really don’t think you’re being unreasonable Op.
The hospital could ask you to self isolate for 2 weeks as they do for any other procedure.
You should be able to make the choices you could pre covid. There was an article I was reading the other day about the risks of non Covid and this is certainly one example of that.
Your mental health hasn’t been considered here. You should have had a scan and you should be allowed to choose in my opinion. You are not being unreasonable I don’t think.
I hope things go as smoothly as possible for you.

I had a medical, it was done at home. I had repeatedly told them I wanted it done surgically due to likelihood of complications. But they kept me waiting and waiting and eventually I had to take the medical or it was never going to happen.

If I hadn't had it in the hospital, no-one would have found me when I was collapsed, having haemorrhaged, and my two children would be without a mum.

It was touch and go for a few days following emergency surgery.

So it really isn't something I think people should do outside of a hospital, at least bot if they don't have someone right there with them, including in the toilet.

Sorry if this sounds upsetting - and by the way I've suffered multiple losses myself including late missed miscarriages, I do know how it feels.

Cost is a huge factor! The NHS are there to provide a service to people who need it, you don’t need a D&C to resolve your issue. You’re just being entitled and want one.

Services are limited at the moment due to COVID, an obstetric surgeon and associated surgery team members time needs to be reserved for people who are seriously ill and there are no other options but surgery.

If you want to pick and choose you can go private.

[quote Georgeoftheinternet]@farfallarocks I have no support structure generally and going through something traumatic I also don’t have a support structure. I just what a surgical because I also don’t have the means to be ill at home with the side affects. I don’t have mental health support. I don’t have a high pain threshold. I’ve been sleeping and feeling sick when I’m awake. I’ve been unable to go to the gym. I’ve been unable to get mental health referrals.
I’ve been unable to get anything apart from a guy shoot his load inside me when I was in my bipolar manic state.

Can’t wait to have a self administrated abortion whilst my housemate who wants me to keep the baby knows what I’m doing.

Such fab fucking great news.[/quote]
well then pay for it yourself like so many others do when they want something done a certain way that the NHS won’t fund?