AIBU for expecting a surgical abortion?

[Georgeoftheinternet]

Due to this virus I will have to terminate my pregnancy at home. This scares me because I don’t want the whole process and flushing everything down the toilet, plus bleeding for weeks. 3/100 don’t fully terminate.

Apologies if you are struggling to get pregnant. Everyone’s lives are different.

@GabsAlot I’ve wasted two weeks being sick and tired all the time. I’m actually thinking I will get the pills as a few days of sickness meaning I won’t be in bed constantly would be great.

@EmeraldShamrock I’m also considering her feelings. Some people are against abortion so it’s good to consider your behaviour around them.

If I were you I would push for a surgical, they might have said no now but that could be subject to change as others are being given that option.

If they don't budge then you could wait it out until medical is no longer an option.

If you go for option two then you may change your mind by that point anyway.

@Chloemol women have always had the option of surgical or medical abortion. Guess what, all women had to have scans before terminations, now they don’t. If the nhs was really that concerned it would have put that procedure in place before.
65 million people in the country. Everything we do pays tax. Nhs can stop wasting money.

@Floating662 yes that’s my risk that I may change my mind. :/

I have had surgical before I was only 7 weeks and I told them I did not want medical and I wouldn’t have had medical for some of the reasons you stated.. pain blood not working etc. Mine was through BPAS and you are given a choice .. some providers I know don’t give you a choice if you are not over a certain amount of weeks.

The wait was longer though for a surgical and yes your right in saying it used to be that they wouldn’t offer you treatment without seeing a viable pregnancy on a scan.. I was to early at first and I had to wait.

I had the vacuum method under conscious sedation.. I was awake and it wasn’t painful but it was not a nice experience they injected my cervix to numb it which was the most painful part to be honest. Everyone is different but I saw a PP saying after this procedure they were in agony. I had no pain whatsoever Untill a few days after when I could barely walk I had to call the help line and was told it was my uterus contracting back to original size.

My friend had an abortion with BPAS. A few weeks ago and it was tablets at home only due to Covid.. maybe you could try and push for it but I don’t know

@MitziK

“STOP carries a significantly higher risk of infection, blood loss at the time and damage caused during the process, unfortunately. As does MVA, which many people find traumatic due to the pain.

I'm sympathetic, but I do feel that they're making the right decision in providing the safest option for you, even if it doesn't sound particularly pleasant.”

No it doesn’t. www.nhs.uk/conditions/abortion/risks/

Just read your update. I wasn't aware you're only around 5 weeks pregnant. Yeah I don't recommend waiting another 5/6 weeks.

When is your medical planned? As at this early gestation, I really don't think it will be as bad as mine or other posters.

But also just to add surgical does come with risks too just different ones.. It can cause serious damage to your cervix etc in rare cases but they do warn you

@Roselilly300 could you remember the procedure? That sounds awful. Why didn’t they fully sedate.

I'm sorry you're going through this insist it is what you need.

@Georgeoftheinternet yes I remember all of it very clearly.. they will definitely not ‘put you to sleep’ unless your over a certain amount of weeks .. I think it is 12 it’s not even an option. I had the conscious sedation option it was either that or the pills.

@onlie I have got the appointment tomorrow for the chat. I’ll just ask them to send the pills I’m feeling ill and sick of not going to the gym (which was helping My mental health).

It will be 5 weeks on Sunday since I last had sex so I think that means the scan should show a pregnancy,

@Roselilly300 conscious sedation sounds stupid. Either sedate fully or don’t sedate. General isn’t needed. My friend had a sedation termination and she also got that for the coil as well. That’s what I’m expecting.

At BPAS it’s 3 options pill conscious sedation or general. Not to mention I had about 4 nurses pushing down on my stomach through the whole procedure and whole ordeal is an entire day in the clinic. I’ve had friends who have said taking the pill was just like a heavy period.

I’ve had a surgical evacuation of a missed miscarriage . I bled heavily for several weeks afterwards - including ( and sorry for TMI) a torrential toilet bowl filling incident . I’ve also had several miscarriages - I lost far far less blood with these than after the D&C . Obviously everyone is different and my circumstances were different too BUT I mention this so you don’t think that having a D&C is necessarily an easy option. I’m sure you will experience at least some bleeding even if it wasn’t on the scale I had. I think it will be pretty hard to hide from your housemate that you have had some sort of medical intervention.

@Georgeoftheinternet
Thank you for your kind comment. It really sounds like you have an awful lot of things going on for you right now.
I’m not trying to pry but have you talked to anyone about your Bipolar- mental health should form part of the assessment of risk etc for any patient. I personally knew that because of what happened I could not go through the distress of managing a medical miscarriage at home.
Have you got a midwife or doctor managing your care? Is there anyone who you could talk to and they could advocate for you. It sounds like an awful situation for you.

Oh yes and the bleeding you still get that with a surgical. Sorry for the info but I had blood and and huge clots pouring out of me a few Days after the procedure.

@Roselilly300 there are three options depending on your gestation*.

However I’m concerned by why you had all the nurses pushing down on you?!?!?

And re: all the comments about sedation I had a GA and stayed in overnight.

Hi Op
Just dropping by to say I’m ashamed at some of the responses you’ve had on here. I get you. Stand your ground on what you want and yes it’s gonna be hard.
To others on here, you really need to review your statements and decide if this is the thread for you and if you might need some counselling going forward.
FWIW I’ve had both, they sucked a lot, one wasn’t worse than the other. They were shit in different ways. I was a kid.
I suggest getting advice from an independent charity, not here. There’s too much emotion involved.
Good luck to you

@Thisisconfusing hi I’m sorry you had a bad time.
It would be a a D&C it’s vacuum.

@Thuglife why did you have a general?

@Thuglife I’ve missed all the appointments so I haven’t spoken to anyone lol. Tomorrow I will. The thing is, if they aren’t offering it, not a lot I can do.

Hi so I thought it would actually be sedation. Wtf is conscious sedation.... it sounds awful!