AIBU for expecting a surgical abortion?

[Georgeoftheinternet]

Due to this virus I will have to terminate my pregnancy at home. This scares me because I don’t want the whole process and flushing everything down the toilet, plus bleeding for weeks. 3/100 don’t fully terminate.

Apologies if you are struggling to get pregnant. Everyone’s lives are different.

So someone who has a serious mental illness and is experiencing something traumatic and isn’t thinking clearly doesn’t deserve any empathy or support because they aren’t thinking clearly?

@Bluetonic41

Surgical evacs for miscarriage and terminations are not being routinely offered due to the increased risk to staff in theatre. Your hospital may give you the option of a MVA which could suit you better, just enquire. Unfortunately you are choosing to have this procedure so you need to go along with the safest option for the staff caring for you.

Op I"m not sure that AIBU is the best place for this thread. It doesn't tend to attract the most reasoned of replies. Could you go to your GP and explain your living circumstances and mh condition and say that you are very anxious and unsure about having to go through this in your own? I hope you get the support you need.

Bluetonic1 while I understand the need to protect theatre staff, surely there are some instances - a serious mh condition such as bipolar for example - in which the patient's needs come first?

Really sorry for your situation. I heard bad things about medical abortions but if its any consolation à surgical one was almost impossible to get even before the pandemic.

Sorry, couldn't see full screen. Apologies, I realise this isn't in AIBU.

sorry to hear that vharvey-but some people do recall it it depends on each individual its not a GA

I hope you’re ok OP, that this can be resolved and you’re better supported in the future. MH services are shit, so are NHS abortion services

[quote Georgeoftheinternet]@Chuggington2 hey lady I don’t like your tone.

NHS is there to provide a service, I’m asking for this service. It would have been offered before and if I choose to have a service why should my needs not be considered. It’s a very fast and quick procedure. Cost isn’t a factor.[/quote]
No.
They provide medical care, if deemed appropriate.
In your case, you've been given the option that they deem appropriate.
Let's be honest, your level of entitlement is shocking and to be blunt if being pregnant was going to be such a problem for you, you should have taken appropriate precautions or better still have abstained.

And if you want a different service/provision, pay for it privately.

YANBU OP

You are legally entitled to have an abortion, for any reason you like, up to 23 weeks and 6 days pregnant. You also have a right to access suitable medical care. It seems clear from what you have said that a home medical abortion with little at home support and having just weathered a period of mania, would put you at greater risk than a surgical one.

These things have a way of seeming insurmountable when we’re stuck in the middle of them, but time is on your side. There is no rush and you do not have to be pregnant if you do not want to be

Pregnancy sickness is bloody awful, but do you think you could manage a walk, outside or maybe even a slow stroll on a treadmill at the gym? Just to bolster your MH?

Try not to put too much stock in signs either. I think we all do it, especially with tough decisions, but you are free to ignore them and do what’s best for you

Take care of yourself

[quote BoggledBudgie]@SoloMummy how lovely to know that there’s people like you out there. The ones that know jack shit about bipolar and mental health issues but somehow still deem themselves competent enough to comment on a situation involving mania and the brains reasonings during mania. Away and boil your head love.[/quote]
Funnily enough, her MH didn't stop her dtd. And presumably haven't negatively impacted on her intellectual ability.
Yet she seems to have not taken precautions and then thinks the world should jump to resolve her issues.

You get the bleeding even with a surgical one, but talk to your provider to see if a local anaesthetic procedure can be done, takes around 15 mins and doesn't need sedation, it was my midwife who did mine (she was also a women's health nurse practitioner)

@Georgeoftheinternet
You don't need sedation at all, as I said I've had one.

@Chuggington2

Having suffered several miscarriages, two of which being ‘missed’ meaning I had to go home and take the Misoprostol - never had a choice, and then had to deal with what you’ve described. I think you need go home and crack on with it.

If it doesnt work you’ll then be offered a D&C. These are expensive proceedures as they require an obstetric surgeon, anaesthetist, and theatre time. I think others in more need of these services probably need to be prioritised first above yourself do you not?

Its not pleasant, but then many things aren’t. Make sure you ideally have someone with you, take the painkillers and follow the instructions to the letter.

This

At four week post conception, even six weeks past, a medical abortion is fairly straightforward and there is no reason to think you'd be bleeding for weeks afterwards. At most it would be like a bad period. I do know people who've had them.

Don't waste any more time.

Hey all be spoken to the clinic and they are fine doing a surgical. It’s general. I don’t need to have a medical should I not wish.

Such misguided information on here and also the phone line.

Thanks all that gave support.

@movingonup20 you mean to write... you were comfortable to have a termination with just local

@movingonup20 not everyone bleeds with surgical

@Georgeoftheinternet glad you’re getting what you needed in the end. Do you have anyone at all you could turn to for support? If not, please feel free to PM me. I’ve been where you are (although not during a pandemic!) and I know what it’s like to be completely alone so definitely understand what you’re going through

I'm glad it is all sorted.
All the very best.

@BoggledBudgie thank you. I have no one. I’ll be fine as they are sending me home in a taxi. Thought I would need someone with me.

@jessstan1 I’ve read horrific side affects. Plenty of people on here have said it’s terrible. I choose not to go though with it.