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Pregnancy choices

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Original poster

Abortion scan please please help desperate

514 replies

tryingtobestronger · 09/08/2016 10:07

I went for a scan yesterday, assuming Id be having my abortion on Wednesday and Thursday of this week.

My lmp dates suggest im just over 7 weeks.

My scan showed I was around 5. They said I need to go back in two weeks time to redo the scan as they need to see a embryo and all they saw was a pregnancy sac (normal for 5 weeks).
I am so upset. Will I be over 9 weeks when I go back? Nurse said no- I will be around 7 weeks.
What date did your scan go by?
I'm really struggling, have no one to talk to and I'm so confused . Please someone help im begging you.

OP posts:
fusionconfusion · 09/08/2016 17:28

Trying do you think you might have depression or anxiety that is making this so particularly terrifying? You sound terribly terribly alone and in distress and the abortion seems to have soaked up all those feelings. I think the suicidal thoughts and feelings warrant a trip to the GP about that, to discuss these things.

madgingermunchkin · 09/08/2016 17:29

With the best will in the world, you need to take a deep breath and get a grip. You have a small child who will have noticed that his mummy is hysterical, and he's going to be feeling insecure.

Stop googling, stop thinking worst case scenario. Trust the medical professionals who do this day in, day out and focus on the child you do have who's daddy isn't around. There are reasons they do it the way they do it; to minimise risks and complications .

I get that it's scary and a worrying time, but winding yourself up and becoming hysterical isn't going to help anyone.

Original poster
tryingtobestronger · 09/08/2016 17:32

I'm normally fine. I missy husband yea and it's hard. But before this I managed well. I'm usually confident, happy and calm. So what the hell is wrong with me now. Is it because my fears are right and this is going to be dramatically painful and I won't cope.

I know he needs me and I'm so sorry I wish I could give him to someone who deserves him

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Original poster
tryingtobestronger · 09/08/2016 17:33

I won't commit suiicide I know I won't

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Original poster
tryingtobestronger · 09/08/2016 17:35

I've just given him a big hug and told him I loved him and that he look cute in his Paddington pjamas and that I'm going to get him more cute pjs. Wven though he's a big boy and likes cool grown up stuff, no one knows if he weRs babyish pjs. He laughed and liked that. So now I put the tv on for him and come to the bath to cry instead so he won't know

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Original poster
tryingtobestronger · 09/08/2016 17:36

I know I need to get a grip

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Original poster
tryingtobestronger · 09/08/2016 17:39

I am so sorry

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TheMshipIsBack · 09/08/2016 17:47

No need to apologize to anyone here! You're distressed and panicking, and this is a safe place to get it out of your system until you can access real world help. It's probably too late to ring your GP today, but that's what other helplines are for. Samaritans are there to listen to anyone who needs it, maybe give them a ring after your son's tucked up in bed.

Original poster
tryingtobestronger · 09/08/2016 17:49

Why is there so much bad stuff on the Internet .

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CrazyDuchess · 09/08/2016 17:55

Please listen to everyone telling you to stop Google ingredients whilst you are in this frame of mind. It won't help you.

SirVixofVixHall · 09/08/2016 17:56

OP could your GP refer you to someone to talk to to make sure this really is what you want? You sound so distressed and upset- try and separate it out, e.g. Are you upset because deep down you want to have the baby but feel unsupported? Or are you upset because you are really frightened of the procedure,( but feel it is what you want)? Either way there will be people out there to help, support, and reassure you. If you do want to keep the baby then asking your health visitor for details of organisations that might give you a bit of support might be an idea? If you feel really sure you don't want to go ahead with the pregnancy, but are terrified of the procedure, then I'm sure your GP could make sure someone talks it all through with you properly beforehand and deals with all your worries. You have a two week wait and that is quite a while to go on feeling this anxious, all alone. I think you need a bit of real- life help, and if you don't have friends locally then getting some help through the GP/health visitor/local women's groups etc, might make you feel less alone.

Original poster
tryingtobestronger · 09/08/2016 17:58

I don't want the baby. I want this over. I'm scared the longer it goes on the worse it'll be. I can't stop crying please help me stop

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Original poster
tryingtobestronger · 09/08/2016 18:02

What is samaritAn

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CrazyDuchess · 09/08/2016 18:03

You sound really distressed - if you have no one irl you could talk to have everything you considered the Samaritans that was suggested up thread. You really need to speak to someone and it doesn't seem like this thread is helping you?

CrazyDuchess · 09/08/2016 18:03

You sound really distressed - if you have no one irl you could talk to have everything you considered the Samaritans that was suggested up thread. You really need to speak to someone and it doesn't seem like this thread is helping you?

Original poster
tryingtobestronger · 09/08/2016 18:04

I just called Samaritans but it didn't help I just cried.

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Original poster
tryingtobestronger · 09/08/2016 18:04

They sounded scary

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Original poster
tryingtobestronger · 09/08/2016 18:07

They were just silent . And I just cried on the phone

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CrazyDuchess · 09/08/2016 18:10

I think they were probably waiting for you to explain - it's a listening ear type service.

CrazyDuchess · 09/08/2016 18:10

I think they were probably waiting for you to explain - it's a listening ear type service.

alltouchedout · 09/08/2016 18:13

Oh OP. A lot of the scary stuff on the Internet is put there by anti choice people who want to terrify and mislead women into not aborting. If you possibly can, stop reading it.
I had an abortion at 9 weeks (scan and lmp agreed, so it was 9 weeks since my last period and 7 weeks since conception). It was by MVA, not pills. It was quick and there were no difficulties whatsoever. Not one. Abortion services in Britain are very, very good. The care is excellent.
You sound like you have an awful lot going on. You can email the samaritans if that would be easier for you.

Original poster
tryingtobestronger · 09/08/2016 18:16

The surgical method frightens me even more I am petrified

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Original poster
tryingtobestronger · 09/08/2016 18:17

What if they make me have the surgical

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CrazyDuchess · 09/08/2016 18:29

No one is going to make you do anything you don't want to

Clearly you had an expectation as to how today was going to go, and that didn't happen and are now in a bit of a tailspin. You need to try to calm down and focus. You can't do that if you keep ruminating.

Try to dis tract yourself for the evening and tire yourself out so you can try to get a decent nights sleep and try and tackle this tomorrow with a little bit more of a level head and less anxious.

MrBoot · 09/08/2016 18:30

They will only do a surgical procedure if that is the best thing for you. The same way they would do a c section if you went ahead with the pregnancy ie if you needed it.

I understand what an unwanted pregnancy is like. But you simply have to calm down and treat it like a hospital appt.

I strongly advise you to get counselling.

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