Abortion scan please please help desperate

[tryingtobestronger]

I went for a scan yesterday, assuming Id be having my abortion on Wednesday and Thursday of this week.

My lmp dates suggest im just over 7 weeks.

My scan showed I was around 5. They said I need to go back in two weeks time to redo the scan as they need to see a embryo and all they saw was a pregnancy sac (normal for 5 weeks).
I am so upset. Will I be over 9 weeks when I go back? Nurse said no- I will be around 7 weeks.
What date did your scan go by?
I'm really struggling, have no one to talk to and I'm so confused . Please someone help im begging you.

No no family. I'm not close enough to them and if I tell them they will make me feel worse and call me stupid which I am

I conceived around 5 weeks ago. Which would make dating scan right.

I read horror stories of the further along you are the more medical avprtions hurt. And I'm so scared.

Will I be over 9 or around 7 weeks

Have you spoken to Marie Stopes? I'm sure they have an advice line .. I'll have a Google

I spoke to bpas yesterday and the operator lady was nice and put me through to a clinic and said they would probably be happy to answer any questions that are worrying me. That lady she put me through to said she didn't know, all the nurses are busy and they she hung up on me

By lmp dates I should be taking the first pill tomorrow

Please don't go

The dates are confusing, because they date a pregnancy from your last period, so a five week pregnancy would normally be an embryo that is actually three weeks old (so when you are around a week late for your period). That would be the stage you are at now, and why it is to soon to see a heartbeat. With my last baby I had a scan at five and a half weeks because I'd had some spotting, I had a result like yours, sac but no heatbeat, so they couldn't say at that stage if it was a viable pregnancy or not. I had to go back a week later and by then there was a heartbeat and they could confirm the pregnancy. I'm not sure why they are making you wait another two weeks, I would think a week would be enough, and obviously the waiting must be very upsetting and stressful. In two weeks time you would have a pregnancy of seven weeks, if it is viable , but the actual embryo would be around five weeks along, depending on the date you ovulated/had sex. See if you can get seen again more quickly. I'm sorry you have no support around you.

I have never had an abortion, but I can obviously imagine how distressing it is. You sound very very upset and unsupported though- are you certain this is what you want to do? If you are absolutely sure that this is the right choice for you, then I think pushing to get seen sooner would be the best thing to do. Could you go back to your GP?

I begged and begged. She said even if I come back next week there is a strong chance that nothing will be picked up on scan. And the sonographer advised two weeks as that's when they will be able to see what they need to to go ahead. I begged and I begged and she was very nice but said there is nothing they can do until they see what they need to. She said she can tell me exactly what they need to see before they can go ahead but it might upset me. It needs to be a viable pregnancy and as it was dates T around 5 weeks that it was far to early. I last had sex around 4 and hLf weeks ago. So that would be conception date

Can you ask if they would scan you again in 1 week instead of having to wait for 2?

I understand the wait is horrific and you want it all over but if it's any reassurance I had a termination 10 days ago at 9 weeks and it really wasn't bad, I was dreading it and thought that at 9 weeks it would be worse but I had about 10-15 minutes where the cramps were bad and I was going to take the offered painkillers but before I got the chance I passed the tissue and the cramps almost completely disappeared after that.

I honestly feel like ending it all but I'm even to scared to do that

Were you 9 weeks from your scan or from your period?

I've read it's like labour and it's horrid an bloody

I don't know anything about terminations so I'm not going to advise you on that but wanted to offer you a virtual hug. You're not stupid; unlucky or careless perhaps (and most of us have been careless sometimes,it's not a crime). Now you are in a bad situation but you are being strong and facing it. I hope you can find strength and peace over the next few weeks and that things work out in the future for you.

Thank u all for being so lovely to me

I was 9 weeks on the scan.
I passed clots/tissue twice while I'm the hospital, I only know this because I felt them, I didn't look. The nurses were amazing, they gave me a pan thing to put over the toilet and everything went in there and they examined it and told me when I had passed the pregnancy. I had a day or 2 of bleeding a bit heavier than a period and it gradually decreased over the first few days. I had the first pill on the Thursday afternoon then returned on the Saturday morning. I had this email pills at 9am and some more at 11am. I had passed the pregnancy before 12 and was home before 3pm

It's nothing like labour. It's like a bad period if you're not admitted to the clinic.

I've never gone through labour so can't compare but I get bad period pains and it wasn't as bad as some months I've had. There was literally 15 minutes maximum where I was in pain and it wasn't as bad as I had expected. There was also no pushing or anything like that. I literally had the cramps and went to the toilet and it came out like a blot clot during a normal period

Did u ha e someone with u on hospital

HVe

My boyfriend dropped me off but couldn't stay as there were no private rooms and there was another woman on the ward also having the same procedure. We both had curtains around the bed the whole time. I was given a buzzer if I needed a nurse though I never rang it. My boyfriend came back at 1:30 for visiting but everything was over by then. The other woman was alone the whole time. The nurses were excellent though. I didn't want to be alone and considered discharging myself so I could be at home with my boyfriend but in the end it was totally fine and I didn't need to spend so much time worrying about it all

My husband says I've changed since this happened and he's been at boiling point for weeks . And I have changed. I can't be happy when I talk to him . He's so upset and disappointed at me. I feel I need to let him go live hom life. He's only almost 24

He has had a rough few weeks hisself, trying to get more money for yet another visa which will probably be refused . Making himself broke for something that will never happen

Your home situation sounds like it's making things more complicated. He's obviously detached from it all because he is not physically there with you and because you are the one going through it all and I know how much it takes over every thought. I can understand as I felt like I was a different person and I was horrible and all these things are happening to your body and in your head and you need to have medical appointments and be the one going through the procedure alone, it seems so easy for the man compared to us. But already I am feeling myself coming out the other side and getting back to normal. It's not taking up all my head space any more and I'm the last few days I've started to want to make plans and feeling so much better physically and emotionally. I thought it was going to change me forever and the weeks it was happening seemed the longest ever but it's getting better and I really see the light at the end of the tunnel and am feeling like the old me again.

Should I let him go.

That's how I feel. I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. I feel they wil keep pushing it back and back and I'll be stuck with a pregnany

They really won't keep pushing it back. As explained upthread, there are good reasons for waiting a couple of weeks. Put it out of your mind and concentrate on your son for now.