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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Mortifying preganancy stories!

237 replies

VirtualPA · 07/06/2010 08:45

Can I have your's please?

I had one this weekend...

I was staying with my parents and coughed.
My knickers were flooded and I thought my waters had broken.

Legged it into my parents bedroom in the middle of the night. My mum leaned over, felt my wet pants, sniffed her fingers and said

'go back to bed, you just peed yourself'

OP posts:
Original poster
VirtualPA · 10/06/2010 10:03

How strange is this.I started the thread and now have more too add!

My midwife sent me to hospital yesterday as she was concerned i had a ruptured membrane at 34 weeks (I didn't)

I was very carefully walking back to my room, with a bowl of wee in one of those disposable cardboard pots. Trying verrrry hard not too spill it.

Who do I walk into? My ExH and his new gf who is in labour and screaming!

I just stood there with my wee!

OP posts:
thedogwalker · 10/06/2010 10:28

I am 30 weeks and as yet have had no embarrassing wee, poo or vomit moments, but I must admit, I've been pretty close to weeing myself reading all these fabulous stories. This thread should defo be a permanent thread on here as it cheers everyone up so much.

thanks to everyone for the great laughs :0

NewbeeMummy · 10/06/2010 10:35

Have a few...

At about 6 months pregnant we were staying at my PiL's, we were eating breakfast and I was still in my PJ's and all of a sudden my boobs started to leak (I'm not talking a drip either, more like someone had turned on a tap!) I was so embarrassed I poured my glass of juice over myself and pretended I had spilt it so I could go and change - needless to say I bought breast pads asap after that.

Rather late on in my pregnancy I was doing a large shop to stock up the house with everything we'd need, half way round I suddenly had this really bad urge to pee, and suddenly had that horrible warm wet feeling, I left my trolley in the middle of the aisle ran back to the car, thinking "thank god I always carried a spare pair of pants and trousers" only once I had discreetly removed my lower layers in the car did I realise I was in the DH's car and didn't have my change of clothes. Rode home naked sitting on a reusable shopping bag

I was two weeks later so had to go in to be induced, during the early stages of labour I suddenly felt my slippers were wet and looked down to find I had peed myself and it was running down my leg. (I still have the slippers - they have been washed, and the DH decided to take a photo at that moment, and still reminds me of it everytime he sees me in my pee slippers)

NewbeeMummy · 10/06/2010 10:38

I knew there was another one....

During labour I reacted quiet badly to the stuff they give you after the G&A and before the epidural, so was throwing up everything I was drinking (couldn't even think about eating anything) anyway, I suddenly had the urge to be sick again, and having filled up all the cardboard sick trays I noticed a big plastic bowl in the corner of the room and asked the DH to pass me it. Once the midwife returned she explained that it was actually the bowl they used for aroma therapy oils - oops!

BelQ · 10/06/2010 13:02

G&A sent me a bit loopy in labour. On my hands and knees after one particularly painful contraction I said to my husband 'right, that's it, I'm off home, I'm not having another one of those, you can stay here and deal with it' thinking seriously that if I left the room, the contractions would somehow stay where they were.

Original poster
VirtualPA · 10/06/2010 14:24

lol BelQ

OP posts:
LynneAB · 10/06/2010 14:24

I was about 37 weeks pregnant and out shopping. A man had parked really close to my car and I couldn't open the door very wide... I had to stretch my leg out to get in and as I did I farted very loudly. To my mortification I realised not only was there a man in the parked car.. but his window was open. Luckily my fart had sounded like ripping cloth so he probably just thought I'd ripped my trousers!!!

choxanwine · 10/06/2010 16:40

.... just wet myself laughing so much!!! (not pregnant btw but these bring back so many memories..!)

Rozi77 · 10/06/2010 18:03

Haha That was v funny!

This happened to a friend of mind whilst giving birth! Had her first poo in front of DH, 4 doctors and 2 MW's as it was a teaching hospital! Fortunately they just whisked it away but how mortifying!!

Mercedes519 · 10/06/2010 18:29

Its a good thing I'm pg already but OMG these have made me laugh.

outnumbered - your story especially rang true. Had a section with DS1 and they came and checked the scar every day. Doctor comes in with two med students "can we check your scar?". I pull up my nightie. Doctor says "shall we pull the curtains round?". I was on a four bed ward at visiting time but hey I had NO dignity left by that point

c0lette · 10/06/2010 18:50

I think my worst moment was (3rd trimester) throwing up on an 8-hr flight from Toronto to London - the puking made me wet myself and I then had to sit for 5 hrs in the plane in wet knickers...

Either that or (1st trimester) throwing up at 8.30am in the street on my way to work, with people throwing me shocked glances, assuming me to be some kind of tramp/alcoholic disgrace...

c0lette · 10/06/2010 18:58

RuthChan that's such an amazing story - love it! It's funny, but also kinda beautiful too... and clearly not every breech baby needs a C-section!

rh5528 · 10/06/2010 20:15

At about 10 weeks I had some bleeding when I went for a wee. Feeling rather panicky, hubby drove me to the local out-of-hours clinic to get checked out. Rather embarrassing when it turned out that I had eaten beetroot crisps earlier that day - apparently it can stain your pee red. Oops.

RuthChan · 10/06/2010 20:57

C0lette:
Yes, I was extremely lucky. My doctor told me AFTER the birth, that she had decided that I needed a c-section.
I was so glad I hadn't known that while actually giving birth. I would have panicked a bit more.

swandivingprimadonnas · 10/06/2010 21:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MayfairMummy · 10/06/2010 21:16

Had home birth mostly in a pool. Really didn't want to poo during birth, but was convinced by fact that had done about 5 massive poos that day, that there really couldn't be anything left.

Midwife arrived and told me my waters had already broken. Proved her wrong when I gushed all over her when she was doing an internal exam. Laughed at the time but she didn't think it was so funny.

Spent 4.75 hours in the final stages of pushing. Midwife in charge wasn't a believer in G&A so did it without. Kept telling me I was 'pushing wrong'. Did my best to push out my bum (like I thought i had read to do). Managed to poo about 5 times in the pool and on the towels while she kept repeating her internals. Through lovely trick of change of shift, managed to have 4 midwives plus one in training to see most of them. . Like to think that it was karma against her being mean to me with no G&A, but suspect it was poor trainee who did most of the cleaning up (i was too busy looking the other way and wondering whether emergency c section was a good thing after all)

EyeoftheStorm · 10/06/2010 21:53

Normasknockers - must be a prem labour thing.

Second evening of premature labour with DS2 at 30 weeks, doctor came to check my cervix. Labour ward quite dim, so she heaves what looked like a miner's lamp onto the bed.

She looked embarrassed and mumbled a bit of an apology about the size of it.

Me, being the soft-hearted lass I am, tried to put her at ease with a joke and said, 'ha ha anyone would think you were going caving!'

She never cracked a smile and I had my stupid comment ringing in my ears all the time she was fiddling around in my fanjo

EnglandAllenPoe · 10/06/2010 21:55

apparently i did a poo that was bigger than the baby.

I told DH not to look....

HarriedWithChildren · 10/06/2010 22:17

How nice to see that the incontinence isn't mine alone.
Coming home from work one day, in early pregnancy, I had to take the bus instead of the train because of flooding or somesuch, and by the time the stuffy, damp, overcrowded, lurching bus stopped near home my back teeth were seriously awash. I got off and, proud of my cleverness, thought I'd roll up my newspaper into a cone to discreetly catch the vomit. So I rolled and puked (and wet myself of course) but I hadn't done it properly in my haste so the vomit just gushed out of the bottom all over my coat.
In pales into insignificance with what was said and done when DS was unexpectedly born at home. DH has been sworn to silence.

noodle6 · 10/06/2010 23:38

I had a planned home water birth for DS1 and it all went very smoothly. Baby was born with just 2 pushes. "It was a textbook delivery!" the midwives commented after the baby was born. Right after the birth, I cradled DS1 in my arms whilst in the birth pool, staring into each other's eyes and falling in love with each other, being oblivious to everyone around us - i.e. hubby, doula, and 2 community midwives. Suddenly noticed some tiny brown stuff floating around the birth pool and my doula came straight away with a net to scoop them out. Turned out they were lumps of poo which must have came out with the baby during the pushing stage. My poo. That is.
I then muttered something along the lines of "oh dear i'm sorry you had to see this" and the midwives said something along the lines of "oh don't you worry, you get used to seeing things like this when you're a midwife..." I still felt very embarassed though!

noodle6 · 10/06/2010 23:51

Oh yes, I once ended up in A&E due to a heart attack/chest pains, shortness of breath, and palpitations ... spent hours waiting in the A&E for them to perform all the necessary chest x-rays, ecgs, blood tests, etc... only to be told that what I had wasn't palpitations, because the doctor took a stethoscope and listened to my heart beating whilst I took deep breaths, and she said "What you're saying is that your heart beats faster when you breathe in, and slower when you are exhaling. That is perfectly normal." And the worst was waiting for the results of all the tests - everything showed there was nothing wrong with me! Eventually I was told what I had was probably just "stress-related".
I felt like such a time-waster, and not only that, I felt like such a hypochondriac.

Was amusing too that during my one and a half day stay at hospital, I overheard a lot - after all what else can you do when you're stuck lying on a hospital bed with nothing much to do... An old lady in the bed next to mine had come in with suspected blockage in her bladders or something because she apparently hadn't wee-ed for a day, but then was told to drink lots of water during her one day stay in hospital and ended up going to the loo a lot. Then to hear the doctor's final diagnosis of her symptoms before sending her home - "You were just a bit dehydrated. Drink more fluids".

Nellybell · 11/06/2010 10:09

A few hours after birth and epidural, it was early morning and people were starting to wake up in the ward around me. Baby had been tightly packed in and it was like all my digestive tract was stretching in to the big space available now baby was out. This however was acoompanied by a non stop stream of farts that i had no control over and were so obvious because the ward was really quiet.

fluffyandpink · 11/06/2010 11:57

after being in long early labour for a long long long time I got to hospital, was examined (and nearly shot off the bed in horror at how far the midwifes arm went up in to my bits!) and on being told I was 3cm said '3 fcking cm? you couldn't squeeze a fcking pixie out of there, I'm going home!'

I didn't go home. Continued with the worlds longest labour and eventually gave birth!

foodista · 11/06/2010 15:48

After properly crying with laughter at this thread last night, I kept remembering snippets on the bus this morning and chuckling to myself...

Thanks all for the fabulous stories (although at 3 months pregnant, I'm now appreciating every day of continence while it lasts...!)

BabyGiraffes · 11/06/2010 16:38

Had to stop reading this thread last night because I was crying with laughter so much my dh got a bit concerned...
I've been pretty okay through two pregnancies but after dd1 was born I did once wet myself because I managed to sneeze while trying to sit down on the loo to pee. Not good!! I did something to the muscles I think and it took a couple of weeks for things to work normally again and I got pretty worried at the time. Reading this post makes me realise I got away lightly!!