Pregnancy after loss part 3

[LER2023]

After the first 2 threads have gone really well in supporting others who are going through pregnancy after loss, ive now decided to make a part 3!
This is a safe space for anyone who wants to moan, groan, share your wonderful news or even share your experiences!

We welcome all even those who are trying after a loss!!

Oart 2 thread here - https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/pregnancy/5071488-pregnancy-after-loss-part-2

Part 1 is at the top of part 2's thread if anyone wants to read back.

Welcome all, thank you for being part of this amazing thread🩷🩵

@Lalalala77 I'm so sorry this pregnancy has ended, so difficult when it comes after an optimistic early scan.
There's still time at 35. I do appreciate the tick of time though. I've just turned 37 and trying for number 2. My age hasn't been much of a factor in my risk profile aside from ticking the over 35 box on the booking appointment. My risk profile from the booking appointments has been the same as when I had my daughter at 32. The only difference I have had is a referral to the reoccurring miscarriage team after 2 losses instead of 3. My nan had her 5th at 44/45 - complete surprise!

@Lalalala77 just saw your post, big hugs. I lost my first at 36 and will be 38 when baby is born. My sister in law had my niece at 42. Our midwives had said they are seeing more people in their later 30s and early 40s. I just want to say, don’t let age scare you. We had 9 months of no TTC after our first loss and our mental and physical health benefited from that time away. Take a step back but know that we’re here if/when you return.

@Lalalala77 I'm so sorry for your loss. It was the same for me, a positive first scan at EPU then no heartbeat at the second. I hope you have lots of support around you xx

I popped back to see how you were getting on @Moosey898 and I am so, so sorry. I admire your pragmatic approach and consideration of other paths, I hope one of them brings you the joy you deserve ❤️

@Lalalala77 I’m so sorry to hear your news, I will be thinking of you on Monday ❤️ To give you hope and reassurance, my mum had me at 40 so there is still time although it doesn’t feel like it right now. Sending you lots of love x

I’m sadly out as well and now I don’t know what to do with myself. Hope everyone is doing ok.

@Cosycore if you want to chat please feel free to private message me xx

Me too I had my 3rd d&c on Friday. I'm nearly 43 it's not going to happen for me I have to try and make peace with that. Hope your doing as well as you can xxx

I need a rant ladies, im seething.

I had my telephone appointment with the recurrent miscarriage clinic booked in for 2 yesterday and its not happened.. no phonecalls or anything... i got upset, its draining mentally, ive been trying to keep the appointment to the back of my mind and then yesterday i just absolutely broke over it.

I cant believe ive not even had the appointment so now i have to put myself through even more stress by calling today and finding out exactly what has happened!!!! How do people stay so calm with these appointments hanging over their heads?😪

@LER2023 im not any help because I have an appointment today that I am completely dreading. Every time I’ve been to one of these appointments someone has done something incredibly inappropriate and insensitive and I have made a complaint for every one of my miscarriages, as if that’s not bad enough on its on.

so simply here to hold your hand and say that I’m right there with you.

@LER2023
I'm sorry you didn't get your appointment. Have you been able to get hold of anyone?

I was meant to have an appointment on Monday with a support worker for my MH. I knew something was up when the receptionist went to talk to her supervisor when I tried to sign in. Yep she was on leave and not there! I could have done with talking through my last loss but it will have to wait a couple of weeks.

I had the opposite yesterday though when the HV tried to book me in for an antenatal visit and I had to inform them that it wasn't necessary as I lost the pregnancies. So frustrating when things are passed on. I was having a good day so i was ok but that wasn't a given

I think I’m potentially going through my 4th loss, I’ve had some slight spotting since Tuesday and a bit of reduction in symptoms. I’m at epau later today but I’m not feeling hopeful. I feel so sad because it’s the first time I’ve done aspirin and progesterone and changed my vitamin regime pre-conception to support egg quality and my partner did the same for sperm quality, also had a positive first scan at 6 weeks. I should be 7+5 today by LMP, but scan dated me 2 days behind although saw heartbeat. Might be a long shot but does anyone know anything about getting a referral to Dr Shehata on nhs and if he would still do some immune testing? We have the money but partner is reluctant to go private until we have tried nhs option first.

Good luck at the epu, I'm sorry you are spotting. Leaves love
Sorry I don't have experience of referrals

Happy galentines day ladies!! How is everyone getting on, seems as though its gone V quiet lately!

I have my actual appointment next week for the RMC! which is scaring me a little!

Thought it was our month this month! Had a VVVV faint line which my OH didnt see🙄 (of course he didnt even with his glasses on hes blind as a bat) but AF had decided to show since its valentines day🤣 so now hes constantly saying 'stupid fanny'😳🤣🤣🤣

Its pyjarma day at work and im on.. so im having to wear like 4 layers underneath my pj bottoms because im quite heavy today🙃

Hi @LER2023, I hope your appointment goes well! I’m currently waiting for a date for mine (they said about 6 weeks 3 weeks ago so hopefully not long). I have no idea what to expect to be honest! Let us know how it goes if your comfortable with that ☺️

My DH is also unable to see faint lines 😅 at the moment I’m testing waiting for a negative post surgical management of MMC and he said ‘oh good it’s negative’ to the test I left on the side but it’s not quite. Hoping by Monday it will be negative then it’s just waiting to get my cycle back!

Currently struggling a bit. It’s my birthday today so not only is it a reminder that time is ticking but also I look back at this time last year when I was so hopeful and excited having not long started ttc. 3 losses since then has absolutely killed any excitement I have. Hoping there are some answers about the RMC and we can do something to change the outcome..

Hi ladies - I was on this thread last March/ April time and you were all such a huge support when I was in early pregnancy. It was my second pregnancy but unfortunately ended in another MMC, this time at the 12wk scan. I then later found out it was a partial molar pregnancy. So last year was a tough year.
But I’m now just over 4 weeks pregnant. I’m under the care of recurrent miscarriage clinic, so need to call them to book in for a scan.

I’ve had a look back at what I have missed on this thread since I left, and I am so pleased to see healthy babies be born.

@LER2023 I’m sorry AF has arrived. But I hope your appt goes well. I found the RMC good, they diagnosed me with pcos & put me on metformin and for the first time ever had a regular length cycle. They seem good for support in pregnancy too, with extra scans

@Confusedmermaid1 i’m sorry you are struggling. I found once I had my appt with the RMC that I felt better. Even knowing I was being supported made me feel a little weight had been lifted

They told me 6 months, which would have been september... i got my appointment through for january which was a telephone appointment and theyve said i cancelled it... i didnt they just didnt call.. i now have a face to face appointment on thursday next week.

I had the argument that more women are having to go through the bullshit the nhs are giving to people 'dont have clinicians, dont have the time, dont have this and dont have that' its a pisstake.

Im hoping to find out some answers!! Also happy birthday!! It is very hard when you go through 3. Think majority of people have that feeling in this thread!

I hope you get your negative soon @Confusedmermaid1 then you can start a fresh

So pleased to see you here @Figtree11 all the best over the next few weeks

I'm sorry you are being given the runaround @LER2023 it's not fair

I'm here again, today I got a positive test, I'm not sure how far along I am as I haven't had a period since my miscarriage in December and haven't tracked ovulation. That was 9 weeks ago I started with nausea in the last week which prompted the test plus lack of period. My positive came up quickly in the middle of the day so I guess 5+ weeks but I'll get a dates test next time I'm in the shop. It's bittersweet news as today I also made redundant.

That’s great news @Superscientist so pleased you’ve got your positive so quickly. I’m really sorry about the redundancy though 😔 What a day to find out about both of those things

I'd been waiting to find out about my job to take the test. I was in a pool so they could have let me go even if pregnant as long as the reason wasn't pregnancy so I didn't want the extra stress.
At least I don't now have to worry about working and pregnancy sickness but it puts a bit of pressure on finding a job quickly! I'm going to speak to the GP next week about antiemetics

@Superscientist i hope you manage to sort something soon.

I’m a little over 4 weeks and only symptoms I’ve had so far is sore boobs! So I don’t feel pregnant at all. I have a scan booked at the recurrent miscarriage clinic on 4th March when I’ll be around 7 weeks

Are they still doing scans at 7 weeks through RMC? i only ask because all mine have been early mc's. Like 5/6 weeks so 7 weeks is a little late for me.

My OH mentioned IVF journey last night. Had to explain you had to be a certain BMI, have all this medication that you have to be on them for months, then the egg retrieval and then the sperm retrieval which can easily be done from himself and then they gotta put them together and put it back in and hope it sticks. He knows someone who is on their last round of IVF and thats a positive as shes now a few months pregnant! But then quickly changed his mind and said i didnt know it was so difficult hahahaha yes babe it is..🙄🤣

Gentle congratulations to you though! 4 weeks! Lets hope this is the one!!🤞x

@LER2023 i thought the first scan would be at 6 weeks, but she said she was booking in for 7. Tbh i didn’t think to ask, as my losses have been around the 8/9 week mark. But as I’ve had a couple of appts with them already, if they find anything, you will be put on a protocol of medications etc before those scans. I’ve already started progesterone & I’m on metformin too.

IVF does sound tough, I was starting to think IVF might be what I need, and I’m not ruling it out. Hopefully once you have your appointment you will get some answers.

Thanks for the congratulations- I’m relieved as I was worrying about my fertility, but I am now very scared of another MC or partial molar again

I got a scan through the epu after my first miscarriage. They said to call at 6 weeks and they booked me in for a scan the following week at 7 and a half weeks.
I'm going to give them a call next week.

Hi everyone, just an update to say our little one arrived a few weeks ago. It was a long labour resulting in emergency c-section which I think made it even more surreal. It's still hard to believe she is really here. I want to say a huge thank you to you all for the understanding and support through a time that we hope to be purely exciting but we all know can be just as nerve wracking.

Gentle congratulations on the early positives 💕 Wishing you all the best on your TTC and pregnancy journeys and hoping for a year of rainbows 🌈