PAL Support

[Daffodil21]

Support thread for pregnancy after loss @HalGem99 @treesall

And anyone else...

Oh @Daffodil21 I found it! Thank you for setting this up.

I hope I am still here this time tomorrow!! One day at a time that's my only advice xx

Hopefully we all stay on here! It's so hard isn't it. Getting a positive pregnancy test should full of joy, not fear. In some ways the weeks go slowly but then all of a sudden I realise where we are and seem to be going by quite quickly, so hopefully it continues that way and feels the same for you

Hang in there ladies. Take each day as it comes and never lose hope. Wishing you all complication free pregnancies.

I'm currently 14+5wk after 2 mc's at 8 & 9wk. Was an excruciating wait from bfp to my dating scan but all was looking good. Now counting down the days to a private scan in less than 2 weeks.

Thanks @Chelyanne , congratulations and welcome if you'd like to join!

I'm actually somehow 15+4 after 3 first trimester losses, but still super anxious and booking a ridiculous number of scans because they're the only thing that temporarily reassure me..🙈 my midwife is on hol atm but when she's back I'm hoping she'll do regular checks with a Doppler so I can stop booking scans..!

I was worried in my first pregnancy but it was a total dream. Pregnant first month of trying, zero issues and was all perfect.

It's hard to believe it was all so easy that time and now it seems impossible. I think my pregnancy test lines are lighter again than they were back then at the same stage which is why I am so worried this one will fail. I dread to think how much money I've spent on pregnancy tests in the last 7 months. Hundreds im sure.

Can I join you ladies? I miscarried November last year at 8 weeks. I've just got a positive test this weekend and instead of it being the happy tear inducing moment it was the first time, I'm just filled with worry. No happy announcement to my Fiancé either, I just cried. It seems so tainted now! I had some spotting this weekend so I think I'm going to ring the doctors tomorrow to request my bloods be done. Has anyone done this? Not sure if they will just fob me off!

@els10 welcome, and sorry you find yourself here. It's horrible isn't it, especially in the early weeks when it's too early for scans. Yes, I requested bloods from my gp, which they were happy to do. It kept me going until 7 weeks which was the earliest I wanted to have scan. I had pink blood when wiping at 5+4 and then a red bleed in my underwear at 6+5, which I then needed a pad for that evening and the following morning. I don't know what caused it but all was ok abs has been so far ever since (currently 15+4) so bleeding doesn't always mean bad news.

@treesall I found doing pregnancy tests too stressful so I stopped after getting a digital confirmation. Could you request HCG bloods from your gp?

Thank you and congratulations to you too.
I think I could have gin mad with scans if not for the financial impact. Hearing your babys heartbeat is magical, for me it's feeling good strong kicks when I can finally relax.

I'm on my 10th pregnancy 8wk and beyond, not counted how many chemicals. Had 5 healthy children from 1st, 4th, 6th & 7th so far so I know it's very possible to get a baby after mc. I think most people presume that because we have many kids we've not had problems, you never know what people have had to go through on their journeys. I also have friends who had multiple mc's and an ectopic but never got a successful pregnancy and gave up trying for one at 40. Despite the heartbreak we've had to endure we are very luck to have what we do and hoping this little one thrives too.

Congratulations and welcome @Chelyanne and @els10. I'm sorry for your previous losses. Everything crossed for you this time.

I think I'll be leaving you within a couple of days. I don't have much line progression which is a bad sign for me. It certainly has been the last 2 months.

@Chelyanne thankfully the scan place have them on at half price atm, and my mum also paid for one. I have no idea why they're half price but I'm not complaining! I've got one booked for Saturday but I'm thinking of changing it to Thursday evening as Saturday seems so far away and I can already myself getting anxious about it all 🙈 I'm hoping my midwife will check with a Doppler the following week, but I can't ask her until next Monday. I feel exactly the same as you about movement. Until that happens, if it does, I'm just going to keep booking regular scans 🙈

So lovely to hear you have 5 healthy children - it certainly gives a bit of hope!

@treesall I really hope that's not the case. Could you get an HCG test at your gp? Or would you feel happier waiting it out?

Well still hanging in there! Scan was perfect! Measured 11 weeks 3 days and I've been discharged from the recurrent miscarriage clinic but not sure how I feel about that! On the countdown to the NHS scan next Friday! After that I will pay for private scans as I won't be able to wait until 20 weeks! @Daffodil21 how often do you have scans? Xx

@HalGem99 brilliant news!!! What a relief!!! Did you see him/her wriggling around?

Erm, I've had 6 scans since 7 weeks, and I'm now 15.5 weeks 😳😳 how often varies - there was a time where I had once a week for 3 weeks. I'm trying to do a week and a half to two weeks ... I've already moved Saturday's scan to Thursday evening though because I know I'll be losing my mind in a day or two. My last scan was a week ago. Some of my friends think I'm ridiculous but quite frankly they can all f off because luckily for them they don't understand, and I hope they never do!

Yes it did a full on somersault then was constantly wriggling and kicking it's legs and waving! They let me take a video for my husband and we can't stop watching it!

Your friends can beep off! You just have to do whatever it takes to get you through! I'm going to try and space them out. At the NHS one next Friday, I should be 13 weeks so at the moment I'm thinking I will have 3 private scans from 13 weeks up to the 20 week scan but it may be more! Lol xx

@HalGem99 aww that's so lovely!

I'm always optimistic as to how long I can go between scans then I always end up moving them forward!

Ha yeah exactly, they're not horrible about it or anything, one of them laughs every time I tell her I've got another one booked so soon but that's easy for her to say! Again, she's not being horrible at all, and I do feel a little ridiculous going into the scan place so soon after the last time, but I can't help it so never mind! It's always the same person doing the scans so I'm always like 'hi, me again!' 😂🙈

@treesall how are you doing this evening?

@HalGem99 that's so lovely, I'm so pleased for you. Super lovely to have that video to be able to watch back too!

I'm ok thank you @Daffodil21. My test line was lighter this morning so I suspect I know how this is going to end up... I'm getting pretty used to it now. Wondering if we should have a break from ttc because the third month in a row of obsessively testing and staring at lines etc is getting hard. But I guess I have to try and retain a teeny bit of optimism that it might just happen one of these times. Today was my AF due date / 12dpo so it's still super early and I'm trying hard to be positive, after having a big old cry this morning!

If my tests are still positive tomorrow is it worth me ringing the EPU in the morning to ask whether there is anything extra I / they can do to help give this pregnancy a chance? Eg Would they prescribe progesterone in case it's that? Or would they just say I need to wait for my referral (which could be over a year away) ?

@treesall I think it's pretty difficult to get progesterone prescribed without a referral. I have a prescription on the NHS now but I had to go private first. It's worth an ask though, but I imagine you'll get fobbed off. I've just sent you a DM with details of the private doctor I went to for progesterone (you can do a video call)

@Daffodil21 I assumed that would be the case. Thanks so much - I've just replied

I still have strong positives but the brown has turned red. When will I catch a break 😞

@els10 I'm so sorry, that must be so worrying. Is it heavy? Does it feel like AF?

@els10 what's it like? I had a red bleed at 6+5 and it was ok. Red doesn't always mean the end

How's everyone doing?

I've got my scan tomorrow evening and struggling to stay focused on anything else. My delivery arrived for maternity clothes today, I tried them all on and it's nice to have some clothes that fit (I'm on various meds which make you gain weight so I look a lot further along than I am) but I'm leaving the labels on until we see what tomorrow brings 🙈

I wish this was more enjoyable...

@Daffodil21 my fingers and toes will be crossed for your scan. Al the positive vibes are coming your way!

I'm ok thank you. Sad I haven't progressed to 1-2 weeks on clear blue. If it doesn't do so tomorrow I'll know it's not going to. I did have slightly darker lines this morning on frer but this is following the exact same pattern as last month, and no sore boobs etc so I'm not hopeful. The only thing giving me a tiny glimmer of hope is that my heart rate has gone up, which also happened with my pregnancy last year. When it started dropping is what made me know I'd miscarried prior to the scan.

Thanks @treesall dreading it tbh.

It sounds promising that the FRERs are getting darker though! Did that happen last month? I've read that some people never get beyond 1-2 weeks in successful pregnancies. It's still early for a 2-3 though so hopefully that'll appear tomorrow 🤞