PAL Support

[Daffodil21]

Support thread for pregnancy after loss @HalGem99 @treesall

And anyone else...

@Daffodil21 you are so lucky not to have any nausea! I have suffered so bad. My weight is also out of control, I already look 9 months pregnant but it's just fat and looking bloated!

How many weeks will you be when you stop the progesterone? I've been told to take it up to 16 weeks then stop xx

@HalGem99 I'm so glad to hear you say that! (Sorry 😂) I'm so huge it's ridiculous. I'm in proper maternity clothes now as I can't get my normal trousers over my huge thighs.

They said 16 weeks but I could take it until 20 if I wanted (but she basically said it wouldn't do much!) I'm going to take the full dose for another week as I don't want to stop everything all at once then I might just take half a dose for a week or two after that. I'm also going to ask if she can test my progesterone levels once I stop, although I don't know if they can once the placenta takes over??

Do you think your weight gain has been to do the progesterone? I think mine has been a combination of that abs the steroids. I honestly didn't expect my body to change so much so quickly. Plus I've got stretch marks already 🙈

@Daffodil21 the struggle is real! 🤣🤣 The midwife said that the progesterone will be to blame for weight gain however I know that mine is also due to the fact that I have done no exercise at all since I found out I was pregnant because of worrying it may cause or contribute towards another miscarriage. My mum said it's worth trying so I have! If the scan next Friday is ok, I'm going to start walking again after work and build it up. Also my nausea has contributed to the weight gain as I'm so hungry all the time to the point where I'm heaving and my stomach feels like it's eating itself but at the same time I can't face any food so I lived off crap basically for weeks! Up all night eating whatever I could stomach! The midwife said as long as I'm eating even if it's crap carry on for now!

I'm worried to stop the progesterone suddenly but I wasn't left with any choice! Although I was assured it was safe and no risk involved! The doctor said they used to stop it at 12 weeks but due to the PRISM? Trial, they changed it to 16 weeks. Xx

@HalGem99 I also haven't been doing any exercise for exactly the same reason. Plus I'm so knackered after even a short walk!

Did she say if the weight would start to even out after stopping the progesterone, or are we stuck with it for the foreseeable? 😂🙈

That sounds really tough with the nausea but yeah just eat what you can!!

I'm scared to come off it too. I have some progesterone left over from my last pregnancy so I figured I may as well drop down to one pessary per day for a week or so before stopping, but normally I think you just stop

@daffodil21 she didn't say but I'm hoping the second trimester is good to me and it balances out!

If my scan next Friday is ok a place near me does 4 private scans for £120 so I'm going to book them and spread them out between 13 weeks and 20 weeks xx

@HalGem99 I guess we'll find out!

That sounds an absolute bargain! Mine are normally £90 but they've had them half price for months which I'm not complaining about! I imagine we'll end up booking one the week after next, if not before 🙈

It's such a shame it's always 'if the next scan is ok' isn't it. We say that all the time and also 'if we do have this baby then we'll need x/y/z' 🙈

@Daffodil21 that is expensive! A single one is £49. So the bundle is a real bargain!

I know it is such a shame. I feel like I've been robbed of my pregnancy experience and it upsets me but just need to keep thinking what's actually important is the fact that it's progressing.

I think after next Friday I might try to treat it as a normal pregnancy! Xx

@HalGem99 it's also over an hour's drive away but never mind. It's all been worth it so far to stop me losing my mind!

Yeah I feel the same too. I with I could think 'when the baby comes' and really believe it but I just can't. Literally everything is followed up with 'if we get that far' or 'if we end up actually having this baby'. Any time we talk about something baby related we're a bit weird and turn it into a bit of a joke like 'go on, I dare you to think about how we could decorate the hopefully future nursery' etc etc 🙈 we've also accidentally chosen a name because we 'dared ourselves' to discuss them before we found out and ended up only liking one 🙈 so now we're just like, well we've already named him, we may as well do/think about xyz 🙈 i wanted to do something normal like discuss names just like most other people get to do without a second thought. It felt a little early to but then we found out he's a boy shortly after so I'm glad we had the big/girl discussion when we did

@HalGem99 £120 for those scans is amazing! So good to have that reassurance.

I'm sorry both you and @Daffodil21 are still feeling like it's "if" the baby arrives. That's so hard to be robbed of the enjoyment of pregnancy. I do understand though, and i feel exactly the same. It's weird being unable to plan for anything. We need to get a new car in the next few weeks and would get a bigger one IF we have another baby but I don't feel I can make that choice based on a child that may not happen!

I'm sorry for my panic yesterday. Anxiety is just through the roof at the moment. I have of course tested again this morning and the line looks good, so I'm going to try and step away from the tests for a while now.

Tomorrow is the point at which I had the teeniest bit of spotting last month and knew it was all over, so tomorrow feels like a big milestone / hurdle to get over. 🤞

@treesall I say get the bigger car and plan as if it's definitely going to happen!

Do not apologies, my anxiety is through the roof everyday as well and unfortunately there's nothing we can do to stop it but for me it definitely helps posting on here so carry on!

That is amazing news about the test line!! Do you have pictures of your test lines that you can post? Only if you want to. Don't forget all different factors will affect the strength of the line like if you test at different times, if you've been for a wee already in the night or that day or if you've drank more, if you're using different tests etc so there maybe a valid reason for the discrepancy.

Tomorrow is definitely a milestone for you. Wishing you lots of luck! I remember passing my milestones and it gives you that little bit more hope xx

@Daffodil21 we are exactly the same but we say "when we are lucky enough to have a baby" etc etc it's so sad!

On the flip side however, I do want to be as prepared as I can and I want to try and think positive so today I might look at the pack the midwife gave me! Eeeeeeek I wasn't going to do it until next week after the scan xx

@treesall I would say go gett the bigger car. We bought our house based on having a family. I worry that it will be empty forever but I hope it won't be! I'm SO glad your line is getting darker. Do you think you'll be able to stop testing yet?

@HalGem99 you both sound a bit more normal than us 😂 I think this whole thing has sent me a little loopy! It just seems to be the only way we can discuss actual baby things. I'm not sure we'll ever be able to confidently plan tbh. I was the same with the midwife pack, she told me to read the leaflets before my booking app, so I waited until the day before to look at them, after I had a scan, and I only looked at the earlier pregnancy ones. I still haven't looked at the later ones. It's weird because when we were TTC I would research so much and read all the books, and now I'm actually pregnant I just can't look at the pregnancy stuff!

Don't apologise @treesall we've all been there, and unfortunately as you can see we still are! We are just fortunate enough to be at the point where we can have a scan to check things out x

Thank you @Daffodil21 my first mmc stopped growing around 6 weeks and I never saw a HB so if I can get through the next week and a half I think I might be able to breathe a tiny bit more.

I want to see a 3+ on a CB and then I will step away from the tests fully. I know after a certain point they are meaningless anyway as my hcg kept rising after I'd miscarried the first time x

Two of mine stopped at a 6+3 measurement (although I should have been further along) getting past that point without bleeding was a massive milestone for me too but then I had a red bleed in my underwear at 6+4. Thankfully all was ok

I really hope you get a 3+ soon!

@Daffodil21 do you know what the guidance is on pregnant women and work? My understanding is that we are on the clinically vulnerable list and therefore should stay at home as much as possible which would include working from home if your job role permits? Any ideas xx

@HalGem99 I don't I'm afraid but yeah if your clinically vulnerable then I think you should be wfh whether you're pregnant or not? I think after 28 weeks there are different rules? I've been wfh since March last year and we're not going back into the office until everyone has been vaccinated so I haven't really looked into it. Are you wfh?

Sorry I misread your post as saying you were on the vulnerable list and also pregnant. I'll have a little look and see what I can find

@Daffodil21 @HalGem99 sorry to barge in on your conversation. Was just having a read and wanted to say I stopped progesterone at 16 weeks - I went down to 1 a day for 3 days and then just stopped. It was fine - no bleeding or anything and my tummy which had been very upset settled quite a bit over the next few weeks. I read loads of posts about this before stopping and almost everyone was the same - no effect whether they phased out or went "cold turkey". From what I understand testing your progesterone level won't help much - by this point the placenta is making the progesterone for the baby. It was tougher stopping the pessaries mentally as there was this nagging feeling that maybe the progesterone was the only thing sustaining the baby - even though that makes no sense medically! Good luck to both of you.

During the first lockdown I worked from home full time but this one i'm working in the office full time and seeing clients face to face on a daily basis. I was doing home visits but I've said I'm not doing them anymore! (I'm a solicitor).

My work hasn't carried out a risk assessment which they should've done. But I have told them that I'm happy to work in the office as I actually prefer it but now they are asking for a letter from my doctor saying I am ok to continue to work in the office. I don't really want to waste my doctor's time asking for this! Xx

Hi @BlueberryPancake21 and thank you! You're right, mentally I am super paranoid about stopping it. I actually think it was the steroids that got us to this point rather than the progesterone but I'm still really scared to come off it. I've emailed a consultant I spoke to early on to get their advice so hopefully they'll get back to me soon but I'll probably just keep taking it in the meaning (even though I am desperate to come off it!!)

@HalGem99 I wouldn't say that was wasting your docs time, it needs to be done and yes they absolutely should be assessing if it's safe for you to be there x

@treesall how are you doing?

@BlueberryPancake21 thank you! That is reassuring! Xx

Thanks for checking in @Daffodil21. I am ok thank you. I was bleeding by this time on this day last month so no matter what happens, I've made it further than the last time!

5 weeks today. My total lack of symptoms is making me really doubt there is a chance of this working out. I don't even have sore boobs! But the fact it hasn't happened yet is giving me the teeniest tiny glimmer of hope!

@treesall don't worry too much about lack of symptoms. I don't have many and I think the ones I do have are down to the side effects from the meds rather than actually being pregnancy symptoms